So does anyone have any jokes?? | Page 13 | Squat the Planet

So does anyone have any jokes??

outskirts

I ain't getting any younger.
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"This was in the Netherlands, as I recall, and was setup by the firemen as a joke."
Thanks, glad to hear the origin of the pic. My uncle, who was a firefighter, gave me the pic. It must have been passed around the department as a joke in itself when he was still there.
 

GhostWithTheMost

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What's sex with hippies like?
Fucking intents.

How many activists does it take to change a light bulb?
Activists don't change anything.

How many tour kids does it take to change a light bulb?
One to change it and 300,000 to follow the new one till it burns out.

and finally an offensive one....

How do you get a crusty girl pregnant?
Cum on her ankles and let the flies do the rest.


How do you know when a hippie is on her period?

Shes only wearing one sock
 

Hobo richard

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Hahaha these are great!
Here's my contribution...
Its late and patients and staff have left the dentist office for the day. The dentist remains behind and is straightening golf magazines, when a guy enters.
"Can I help you? Asks the dentist.
"I'm a moth! Says the guy.
"Excuse me? Asks the dentist and the guy repeats: I'm a moth!
"Well this is a dental office, maybe you should be seeing a psychiatrist"
I already tried that says the guy.
"Then why are you here? Asks the dentist.
The guy says,
"Your light was on.
 
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GhostWithTheMost

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How do you get your girlfriend/boyfriend to come crawling back to you after they break up with you?

Break their wheelchair
 

GhostWithTheMost

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Whats the hardest part about eating vegetables?

Getting them back in the wheelchair when your done
 

Odin

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What's Aliens favorite Song precious?

 

Barf

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Www.trumpdonald.org

You can thank me later(after a laugh)

There has been weird energies I've been picking up on in my normal day to day shit and even here.

Take a deep breath through your nose, filling up your lungs but not letting your stomach rise, hold it for a few seconds and exhale. Do this until your blood stream is good and full of oxygen and you feel relaxed.

But cereal, click on the link.

I mean trump is the biggest joke of the year.

<3
barf

Ps - not that off topic this time
 
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Barf

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Edit: mods, with all due respect, could these two posts be merged?

What do you call A sleepwalking nun?

A Roman Catholic.

Why don't you eat pussy in the morning?

Ever tried pulling grilled cheese apart
 
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Older Than Dirt

I'm a d-bag and got banned.
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Did not want to derail the English vegan magic dude's thread any further, but it reminded me of this joke:

Q: How can you tell if someone is vegan?

A: They'll tell you.
 
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