So does anyone have any jokes??

[Deleted member 24782]

There's gotta be joke from this somehow?

"This was in the Netherlands, as I recall, and was setup by the firemen as a joke."

 

[outskirts]

"This was in the Netherlands, as I recall, and was setup by the firemen as a joke."

Thanks, glad to hear the origin of the pic. My uncle, who was a firefighter, gave me the pic. It must have been passed around the department as a joke in itself when he was still there.

 

[SaltyCrew]

How many anarchists does it take to change a light bulb?

How many?

 

[Deleted member 24782]

How many?

Anarchists can't change anything.

 

[SaltyCrew]

Anarchists can't change anything.

Ahhhhhh!!! Lol. I should have known...

 

[GhostWithTheMost]

Whats a Cat use to make its eggs in the morning?
Its Whiskers

 

[GhostWithTheMost]

What's sex with hippies like?
Fucking intents.

How many activists does it take to change a light bulb?
Activists don't change anything.

How many tour kids does it take to change a light bulb?
One to change it and 300,000 to follow the new one till it burns out.

and finally an offensive one....

How do you get a crusty girl pregnant?
Cum on her ankles and let the flies do the rest.

How do you know when a hippie is on her period?

Shes only wearing one sock

 

[GhostWithTheMost]

how does a red-neck girl know when her mom is on her period?



her brothers dick tastes funny.

How do you castrate a redneck?

Kick his sister in the jaw

 

[Hobo richard]

Hahaha these are great!
Here's my contribution...
Its late and patients and staff have left the dentist office for the day. The dentist remains behind and is straightening golf magazines, when a guy enters.
"Can I help you? Asks the dentist.
"I'm a moth! Says the guy.
"Excuse me? Asks the dentist and the guy repeats: I'm a moth!
"Well this is a dental office, maybe you should be seeing a psychiatrist"
I already tried that says the guy.
"Then why are you here? Asks the dentist.
The guy says,
"Your light was on.

 

[GhostWithTheMost]

How do you get your girlfriend/boyfriend to come crawling back to you after they break up with you?

Break their wheelchair

 

[GhostWithTheMost]

Whats the hardest part about eating vegetables?

Getting them back in the wheelchair when your done

 

[White Hawk]

Two lefts don't make a right but two Wright's make one hell of an airplane

 

[Deleted member 24782]

>4 months I've been waiting for a punchline here

It's been so long I forgot the punchline-WTF!!!?>?>

 

[Deleted member 24782]

>4 months I've been waiting for a punchline here

Oh yeah - "BLOOD LITE"

The best part is I tried to google this and came up with nothing...guess it's an original joke!!

 

[Deleted member 24782]

It's been so long I forgot the punchline-WTF!!!?>?>

BLOOD LITE

 

[Deleted member 24782]

Why do anarchists drink green tea??


Because proper tea is theft.

 

[Odin]

What's Aliens favorite Song precious?

 

[Barf]

Www.trumpdonald.org

You can thank me later(after a laugh)

There has been weird energies I've been picking up on in my normal day to day shit and even here.

Take a deep breath through your nose, filling up your lungs but not letting your stomach rise, hold it for a few seconds and exhale. Do this until your blood stream is good and full of oxygen and you feel relaxed.

But cereal, click on the link.

I mean trump is the biggest joke of the year.

<3
barf

Ps - not that off topic this time

 

[Barf]

Edit: mods, with all due respect, could these two posts be merged?

What do you call A sleepwalking nun?

A Roman Catholic.

Why don't you eat pussy in the morning?

Ever tried pulling grilled cheese apart

 

[Older Than Dirt]

Did not want to derail the English vegan magic dude's thread any further, but it reminded me of this joke:

Q: How can you tell if someone is vegan?

A: They'll tell you.