Cornelius Vango (Kelsey Abeler) should be avoided at all costs
- Thread starter Cornelius Vango
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EphemeralStick
Andie of the House of Queer
Sure, why not? Ive made my point, as others have. The more you try to defend yourself the deeper the hole you dig, so it's not like I even need to continue.
Right now everyone can really see you for who you truly are.
Right now everyone can really see you for who you truly are.
roughdraft
Well-known member
so is the idea that "they" does not encompass both "he" and "she"?
Joe Btfsplk
Well-known member
Tuesday morning, three-thirty Central Daylight time.
All's well, no crabassin' posts. Yet.
All's well, no crabassin' posts. Yet.
Dameon
Well-known member
As it was told to me by corn, using "they" when you know a trans person's gender is like denying their identity. Personally, I don't get it, because "they" is inclusive not exclusive, and it's not the same as calling somebody a gender they don't identify with, but I'm not queer in any way so I'm willing to roll with that if it's a general problem among trans people.
...And people always wonder why I have no interest in visiting the slabs... I'll take frostbite over dealing with that crowd any day.
James Meadowlark
Sonic Reducer
This thread makes me sad. Seems like all of the principals in this convo at one time or another cared deeply and profoundly for one another, and used to really, sincerely love each other.
I'm sorry I clicked on the post, I hope it gets locked soon, and that all of you guys can figure out a way to reconcile your differences... All of you were the best of friends for a reason- Try to remember why you loved that person in the first place.
It's really hard to find good friends, and sure, we all have some faults, nobody's perfect. Disagreements happen and sometimes feelings are hurt, but if you are really friends, you can talk it out with an open mind.
I'm sorry I clicked on the post, I hope it gets locked soon, and that all of you guys can figure out a way to reconcile your differences... All of you were the best of friends for a reason- Try to remember why you loved that person in the first place.
It's really hard to find good friends, and sure, we all have some faults, nobody's perfect. Disagreements happen and sometimes feelings are hurt, but if you are really friends, you can talk it out with an open mind.
And all this over fucking pronouns?
You kids baffle me. I get the idea of respecting gender self-definition, but to fall out with an old pal because they use the wrong pronouns about a third party not present?
This just seems narcissistic and silly.
We've all been assholes when we were drunk. Most wake up and apologize.
You kids baffle me. I get the idea of respecting gender self-definition, but to fall out with an old pal because they use the wrong pronouns about a third party not present?
This just seems narcissistic and silly.
We've all been assholes when we were drunk. Most wake up and apologize.
salxtina
Well-known member
The underlying problem - Even if Matt has been considerate and acting in good faith - whatthis conflict has brought up is a string of other people going "haha yeah, the woman they were talking about (who used to moderate and was burnt out by this same kind of trivializing!) shouldn't care about this stuff anyway"
EphemeralStick
Andie of the House of Queer
@Older Than Dirt @salxtina hold up. No. Well yes but no.
Pronouns are what sparked this initial issue but the underlying problem is not that one instance but a multitude of situations where Corn has used easily resolvable situations (like this one), to bully and harass other people.
We are so far beyond what they did to Matt at this point. Now we're all coming clean with our frustrations about how they treat people and how they've used their position with this site to dodge any sort of repercussions for their actions.
Matt, Corn, and their friend could've resolved this issue personally but instead Corn used it as an excuse to berate and abuse Matt well beyond what would be a fair correction. They then went on a crusade (as they've done with others) to get people on the internet to side with them so they can feel validated in their abuse.
I've seen them physically abuse their partners, bully younger nomads for their enjoyment, and drunkenly lash out at people for no good reason. Hell they tried to fight me at the bar in the library because I was doing Tarot readings and they were mad no one asked them. All while maintaining an online presence that allows them to seek validation for their behavior from people who have never actually met them.
This is what we have a problem with. This is what we're dragging on about.
Edited for clarity.
Pronouns are what sparked this initial issue but the underlying problem is not that one instance but a multitude of situations where Corn has used easily resolvable situations (like this one), to bully and harass other people.
We are so far beyond what they did to Matt at this point. Now we're all coming clean with our frustrations about how they treat people and how they've used their position with this site to dodge any sort of repercussions for their actions.
Matt, Corn, and their friend could've resolved this issue personally but instead Corn used it as an excuse to berate and abuse Matt well beyond what would be a fair correction. They then went on a crusade (as they've done with others) to get people on the internet to side with them so they can feel validated in their abuse.
I've seen them physically abuse their partners, bully younger nomads for their enjoyment, and drunkenly lash out at people for no good reason. Hell they tried to fight me at the bar in the library because I was doing Tarot readings and they were mad no one asked them. All while maintaining an online presence that allows them to seek validation for their behavior from people who have never actually met them.
This is what we have a problem with. This is what we're dragging on about.
Edited for clarity.
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@EphemeralStick - Yeah, i get all that, my post was with reference to the high horse of self-righteousness around the whole denouncing the "transphobia" of incorrect pronoun usage thing that started all this off.
This Corn person seems like a real genital (since i do not want to be denounced as a transphobe for using either "dick" or "cunt" since one or the other is sure to offend).
This Corn person seems like a real genital (since i do not want to be denounced as a transphobe for using either "dick" or "cunt" since one or the other is sure to offend).
so, i've read through this thread probably about 5-6 times now, and I don't really feel like there's much more to add to this situation other than to clarify a few things and hopefully move on.
it's still a little bit of a shock to me that corn would throw away the 5+ year friendship we had over something so petty as the pronouns of someone that wasn't even present for the conversation. i agree that these pronouns are important and should be respected; my true friends will always have my loyalty and respect even if i screw up the terminology on occassion.
it just makes me incredibly sad because i thought my friendship with corn was based on more than just my compliance with their beliefs.
Unfortunately I've come to realize that my friendship with this person was highly conditional based on me giving them what they wanted. Once that was no longer the case and I challenged them in their beliefs, I was immediately discarded like many of corn's other former friends, the list of which has grown quite long.
Now I am feeling a like a bit of a fool for defending them as long as I have.
I don't enjoy making enemies. It doesn't make me feel good. It just leaves me feeling a lot of regret over what could have been.
The only good thing to come out of this situation is the truth that cornelius' friendship is highly conditional, and my real friends aren't afraid to have my back in these situations. For that I can't thank them enough.
There's nothing more valuable than true friendship and I will never take that for granted.
I love you all and I can't wait for the next time you're a part of my life.
it's still a little bit of a shock to me that corn would throw away the 5+ year friendship we had over something so petty as the pronouns of someone that wasn't even present for the conversation. i agree that these pronouns are important and should be respected; my true friends will always have my loyalty and respect even if i screw up the terminology on occassion.
it just makes me incredibly sad because i thought my friendship with corn was based on more than just my compliance with their beliefs.
Unfortunately I've come to realize that my friendship with this person was highly conditional based on me giving them what they wanted. Once that was no longer the case and I challenged them in their beliefs, I was immediately discarded like many of corn's other former friends, the list of which has grown quite long.
Now I am feeling a like a bit of a fool for defending them as long as I have.
I don't enjoy making enemies. It doesn't make me feel good. It just leaves me feeling a lot of regret over what could have been.
The only good thing to come out of this situation is the truth that cornelius' friendship is highly conditional, and my real friends aren't afraid to have my back in these situations. For that I can't thank them enough.
There's nothing more valuable than true friendship and I will never take that for granted.
I love you all and I can't wait for the next time you're a part of my life.
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Go ahead and lock the thread and bury it. What i said has all been true. I just hope that my words can help others here.
First off fuck this whole thing (especially that goddamn hilarious Jerry Springer post lol) but this needs to be settled so I'm coming forward.
What Andy is saying is exactly my experience. I also know this to be a number of other people's experiences as well. I imagine corn is probably gonna go throw my shit in the canal for speaking up but knowing Andy's and caveman's experience it's likely already happened. Id be nice to get my d&d characters and guitar back, plus all my other shit but I don't imagine they will let me have my property back. it's not in them to do so especially after this heinous crime of speaking the truth.
You're a narcissist bully and plenty of people know this experience from you.
In a group you're wonderful and give deep, sincere sounding compliments. However it's just an emotional mimicking act because you don't have any empathy. You build people up to knock them down. I've definitely been at the receiving end of that flattery, which makes it so discombobulating when without warning you throw extremely attacking ridicule "when things could have been talked through"
Fuck out of here with that. Speaking of transphobia, who isn't a trans phob conveniently for you? Or racist, or a homo phob or etc? Its a moving target that nobody can hit because you enjoy it.
Of course you only act out your abuses in private. Like pinching caveman awake or punching caveman's dog or your own dog, or smashing your computer during one of your conniptions and blaming caveman. Or scolding me for not getting your pronouns right, or telling me I suck at drawing or that I know nothing about construction, or insulting my intelligence, or hovering this idea around everyone's head that I'm a racist nazi or generally making me feel shitty about myself whenever you could for anything and everything, or calling me a piece of shit anytime I tried to hear caveman's side of things during your daily fights in 2017, claiming it was a "bros fest" so you could try keeping us form communicating. Hot tip, caveman never abused you. It is so deeply sick how you talk about him. He bent backwards to be there for you daily and put up with so much horrible shit from you he never deserved. Hot tip, two-for-one, you make your goddamn problems. YOU need help, not the collective of people in your life you hurt. Look at the pattern. At the second jamboree you single out John Lee's friend and scream at the top of your lungs that you got stabbed and when confronted you denied that ever happened. Resulting in a fiasco night that others had to deal with, you created, and you enjoyed. Super cool corn kicking it in the wild wild slabs. I should have recognized what a fuckhead asshole you were ruining another stp members one night there like that, but hey, maybe it'll work itself out I thought. Didn't even apologise, not that I could imagine that you could, seeing as that requires the ability to take responsibility.
It is indeed 10 fold worst when you're drunk. You have to be the worst drunk I have ever known. That's really fucking something. That's when you lash out the nastiest.
You have no ability to reflect internally and everything you say is f****** b*******. Normal people consider when they offend someone or wrong someone with you it's never your fault and you have a hair trigger to find fault. You act like you're the coolest thing to happen since miles Davis and that everyone should be grateful to you and be allowed in the presence of you and your narcissistic playground which everybody else built, including myself. there's nothing collective about that space. You're like Eric Cartman, there is no kindness in you. You don't take responsibility for anything you do or say to people. you're a cannibal, a f****** vampire narcissist without shame or guilt. The bridges you burn very much light the way and are lit by your gaslighting, baiting, grooming and other demented abusing habits. I could go on and on and on but this is plenty from me. You hurt alot of people, people that were your friends and cared about you, and you know that you have. You recognize that much.
What Andy is saying is exactly my experience. I also know this to be a number of other people's experiences as well. I imagine corn is probably gonna go throw my shit in the canal for speaking up but knowing Andy's and caveman's experience it's likely already happened. Id be nice to get my d&d characters and guitar back, plus all my other shit but I don't imagine they will let me have my property back. it's not in them to do so especially after this heinous crime of speaking the truth.
You're a narcissist bully and plenty of people know this experience from you.
In a group you're wonderful and give deep, sincere sounding compliments. However it's just an emotional mimicking act because you don't have any empathy. You build people up to knock them down. I've definitely been at the receiving end of that flattery, which makes it so discombobulating when without warning you throw extremely attacking ridicule "when things could have been talked through"
Fuck out of here with that. Speaking of transphobia, who isn't a trans phob conveniently for you? Or racist, or a homo phob or etc? Its a moving target that nobody can hit because you enjoy it.
Of course you only act out your abuses in private. Like pinching caveman awake or punching caveman's dog or your own dog, or smashing your computer during one of your conniptions and blaming caveman. Or scolding me for not getting your pronouns right, or telling me I suck at drawing or that I know nothing about construction, or insulting my intelligence, or hovering this idea around everyone's head that I'm a racist nazi or generally making me feel shitty about myself whenever you could for anything and everything, or calling me a piece of shit anytime I tried to hear caveman's side of things during your daily fights in 2017, claiming it was a "bros fest" so you could try keeping us form communicating. Hot tip, caveman never abused you. It is so deeply sick how you talk about him. He bent backwards to be there for you daily and put up with so much horrible shit from you he never deserved. Hot tip, two-for-one, you make your goddamn problems. YOU need help, not the collective of people in your life you hurt. Look at the pattern. At the second jamboree you single out John Lee's friend and scream at the top of your lungs that you got stabbed and when confronted you denied that ever happened. Resulting in a fiasco night that others had to deal with, you created, and you enjoyed. Super cool corn kicking it in the wild wild slabs. I should have recognized what a fuckhead asshole you were ruining another stp members one night there like that, but hey, maybe it'll work itself out I thought. Didn't even apologise, not that I could imagine that you could, seeing as that requires the ability to take responsibility.
It is indeed 10 fold worst when you're drunk. You have to be the worst drunk I have ever known. That's really fucking something. That's when you lash out the nastiest.
You have no ability to reflect internally and everything you say is f****** b*******. Normal people consider when they offend someone or wrong someone with you it's never your fault and you have a hair trigger to find fault. You act like you're the coolest thing to happen since miles Davis and that everyone should be grateful to you and be allowed in the presence of you and your narcissistic playground which everybody else built, including myself. there's nothing collective about that space. You're like Eric Cartman, there is no kindness in you. You don't take responsibility for anything you do or say to people. you're a cannibal, a f****** vampire narcissist without shame or guilt. The bridges you burn very much light the way and are lit by your gaslighting, baiting, grooming and other demented abusing habits. I could go on and on and on but this is plenty from me. You hurt alot of people, people that were your friends and cared about you, and you know that you have. You recognize that much.
EphemeralStick
Andie of the House of Queer
Yup. Me, Matt, Dragon, and John K are all just making up the same lie. Four different people all having the same fever dream and you're just an innocent victim. What a joke.
I don't know about the others, but I've stopped trying to reason with you.
Now this thread just serves as a warning for everyone else to read and know you aren't to be trusted.
Four people, huh? Go ahead and hate and make up your stories. I aint fazed. I got tons of support and a great reputation everywhere besides this circle jerk. I wish you all well, though. I sincerely do.
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Joe Btfsplk
Well-known member
Slab City motto:
"We're all here because we're not all there".
"We're all here because we're not all there".
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