Runaways and Minors

[finn]

Honesty is a big issue, I think all of us with abusive parents really resent the spoiled kids, because they're not honest with themselves or anyone else. But with abusive parents, you do learn how to lie really well, and then you have to unlearn all that with your friends. Some people have a tougher time with that than others. It's all a big mess that I sometimes don't have the energy to deal with.

 

[Ravie]

eh, i allways say, dont travel to get away, travel for the love of traveling. otherwise you'll be running to get away for years.

 

[bobNkamille]

eh, i allways say, dont travel to get away, travel for the love of traveling. otherwise you'll be running to get away for years.

i can agree with you on that. Best way to approach the difficulty's in your life is to find a good way to deal with them

 

[Ravie]

or turn into a nasty home-bum who smells of urine and vodka. but no one wants that.

 

[Dameon]

I want that.

 

[Ravie]

well if thats what makes you happy dameon, i'll support it haha i can pee on you and poor vodka on you i youd like! lol

 

[bobNkamille]

thats a waist of good booze....well not really good, vodka aint my alcoholic cup of tea. but a..........WOOO vodka

 

[Ravie]

eh drink it, shower in it, whatever. i prefer drinking in it.

 

[bobNkamille]

that brings a question about does it sting to get vodka in your eyes. I would think it would but god. Same thing with semen would that sting to get in your eyes. Thats not completely off topic at all

 

[fuck it!]

Honesty is a big issue, I think all of us with abusive parents really resent the spoiled kids, because they're not honest with themselves or anyone else. But with abusive parents, you do learn how to lie really well, and then you have to unlearn all that with your friends. Some people have a tougher time with that than others. It's all a big mess that I sometimes don't have the energy to deal with.

yup....

 

[Beer Mortal]

I never really considered traveling, running away.
People consider me a runaway because im not 18 yet.
But i think of it as an atmosphere change, a chance to explore.
A year or two I did run away from my mothers house a couple times but honestly that was to get the point across that i would NOT stand living with her any longer and could not for my own emotional and mental health.
She got the point and let me go, so now im waiting until i graduate (which will be when im 17, im 16 now) to get out on my own.
alot of people in the past have been very reluctant to help me because of laws and i couldnt blame them, i only got angry when they said I couldnt survive because im young.
they said wisdom comes with age, but thats not always the case.
I was taught alot, very young. how to raise myself, how to cook properly, how to react if im lost. the major things.
Mostly how not to panic. and people just dont want to believe that i can hold my own if im a minor, it really sucks.
but when I graduate ill be able to prove that, until then I can only defend my point and help out and learn as much possible

 

[wartomods]

Damn so many people who hate their parents, i love mine

 

[Ravie]

I love mine too. my mom choked me once but i probably deserved it haha and my dad RIP, was a strict asshole, but he was my best friend. but being so open with my family is probably why they actually approve of me traveling. I have alot of respect for them and they for me.

 

[Beer Mortal]

I just cant grow to love my mother, she didnt raise me so you cant give her credit.
she didnt want to raise me she wanted to be some crazy college chick.
an my father has been in prison all throughtout my life so i havent seen him much, but i do love him.

 

[stove]

Damn so many people who hate their parents, i love mine

Amen x2. I love my parents, I'm just running away from society. I totally agree with Ravie, travel because you love to travel, not because you're running away from home. You'll be running for a while...



That all being said, I've traveled with a few young folks. Mostly, if they can hack it on their own, then I have no problem sharing a tarp/camp/bottle/spliff with any of them. Of course, that's a big IF sometimes.

 

[Ravie]

I just cant grow to love my mother, she didnt raise me so you cant give her credit.
she didnt want to raise me she wanted to be some crazy college chick.
an my father has been in prison all throughtout my life so i havent seen him much, but i do love him.

man, i know what your thinking here, i raised myself too. from the age 9-12 i didnt get a hug or an "i love you" from my mom and i lived with her and shared a room with her. she was like a zombie emotionally and would go to the casino on christmas eve and my birthday. she didnt even notice that i was selling coke by the age of thirteen so i could buy me and my brother groceries. My brother was all fucked up too from my mom filling him with behavioral drugs so he would black out and beat me til i passed out and she didnt notice that either. trust me, i spent plenty of nights angry as hell at my mother. but in the end there's two sides to every story. turned out she was all fucked up herself. her mom died when she was 6, her dad left her to fend for herself at 15(got two jobs and had to drop out to survive), she had been raped, beaten, ect...and it all just so happen to hit her when i needed her most. i held it against her for years and finally realised it wasnt worth it. she tries now at least to help me out and give a shit but if i would have never given her a second chance ide have no family right now. it took my dad dying to realise family is a little more important than being pissed off all the time at em. sometimes it's easier to just let it go no matter what happened. not for them but for you.

 

[wartomods]

I might aswell suffer from stockholm syndrome....... na not really

 

[Beer Mortal]

man, i know what your thinking here, i raised myself too. from the age 9-12 i didnt get a hug or an "i love you" from my mom and i lived with her and shared a room with her. she was like a zombie emotionally and would go to the casino on christmas eve and my birthday. she didnt even notice that i was selling coke by the age of thirteen so i could buy me and my brother groceries. My brother was all fucked up too from my mom filling him with behavioral drugs so he would black out and beat me til i passed out and she didnt notice that either. trust me, i spent plenty of nights angry as hell at my mother. but in the end there's two sides to every story. turned out she was all fucked up herself. her mom died when she was 6, her dad left her to fend for herself at 15(got two jobs and had to drop out to survive), she had been raped, beaten, ect...and it all just so happen to hit her when i needed her most. i held it against her for years and finally realised it wasnt worth it. she tries now at least to help me out and give a shit but if i would have never given her a second chance ide have no family right now. it took my dad dying to realise family is a little more important than being pissed off all the time at em. sometimes it's easier to just let it go no matter what happened. not for them but for you.

wow good point...
Its just at a very early age i felt as though she never wanted me at all
and then my father fed me his side of the story and told me that she was trying to put me up for adoption when i was born and technically she couldnt unless my father agreed and he wouldnt. and for some reason I ended up with my mothers mom. I have tried getting alot with her as a person but for some reason it always ends up in yelling you know?

I wouldnt travel to get away, id travel for the love of seeing new things and wanting to not sit in one place too long.

 

[Ravie]

i'm not saying you have to get along with her, just understand she did everything for some reason in her head, no matter what that was. maybe she thought she couldnt take care of you the right way and thought adoption was best. i'm not saying you even should talk to her if you dont want haha nothing like that. but if you never forgive her then you'll be dragging around that anger with you forever and it may one day be taken out on people you love who dont deserve it. and forgiving her has nothing to do with a mushy ass convo with her. just come to terms with it. it happened. cant change it. learn from it. grow from it. get over it. move on. okay i'm done being dr.ravie now.

 

[finn]

Beer Mortal, you should listen to this advice... It's coming from a wise young lady that clearly has her head on straight.

Seconded, I had to defend my siblings from my father who was recovering from mental illness, though he was sane enough to avoid any punishments that would leave obvious cuts and bruises. My mother didn't stop anything and even encouraged it sometimes since it'd take the heat off her. He's pretty much recovered now, and both of them are pretty much 'normal' now along with both my siblings (though there was an older half-sibling that I haven't heard from in years- but who I didn't feel the need to defend though- long story). But he'd come from a bad place, too... I'm not going to turn this into an epic.

The point is, I don't hate either of them, I reserve my energy, positive or not, for battles that I can win. Learn from the past, but don't wallow in it. When you talk with someone and it always turns into yelling, that means there are a lot of unresolved issues swirling about.