Damn,

[Birdy]

I don't know if I can do this whole, work/deal with pricks/pay for everything/be super fucking tired all the time/deal with drama for the rest of my life.

Let me just say, I had a really shitty day, and yet it wasn't even that bad, but things just got to me.
I'm running out of pot. My managers at work are on my fucking ass about everything and I didn't get to leave early today even though it was my turn to. I'm sick of the assholes who think they can come up and treat me like shit over icecream because I'm behind the counter. I'm sick of how unfair and shady things are at my job but I can't leave it because it's a job and right now I'm still young and living at home and that means I need to have a job so I can go out and play(according to my dad). I like being responsible and shit, but I'm just so tired right now.

Things have been shitty with my friends, my car is starting to break. Everything seems to be going wrong right now and I can't do anything but lay here and take it.


Today at wal-mart I was cashing my check and just looking around made me so upset. I don't want to do this my whole life. I don't want to live this boring life of working so I can have the right to live. My birthday is in 10 days and I'll only have one more year til I'm 18. Thank god. I just don't think my free soul will be able to handle this shit. I don't wanna be some depressed yuppie pushing a grocery cart to my depressed car so I can take food that I had to pay for so that I can live back to a depressed house. I'M SO DEPRESSED!!!


I feel so detached from school. I'm only there for 3 hours a day and do all my other classes online, but fucking christ, the kids there are just......boring. To them it's all about parties, and who's fucking who, and who's cheating on who and blah blah blah. I hate it. I just want to meet someone like me. A free spirit like me. I don't have any close friends really right now because my main girl just got a boyfriend and never talks to me anymore, all my other friends found other interests(like going to HARDCORE shows and hangin with the band all the time). No one just likes to chill and smoke and wonder and dream about things like I do.


The only thing keeping me happy right now is my art.

Damn, I don't mean to whine, but I just needed to get this shit off my chest. For some reason I like spilling my guts out to people who don't know me. It's just nice.

 

[Sage]

We're on the same boat sister.

 

[finn]

Awww, you know your dirty hobo uncles and aunts are here for you. Right now you're in the grips of the public education system, but it will let go of you. And it's okay that you don't have any good friends because you're young, and your first choices were made before you've learned how to choose them properly. Work on your art and expand on it, it's a skill that will help you take care and improve yourself. If everyone around you have to suck, well, might as well make yourself a shining beacon of awesomeness, right?

 

[hartage]

Sage and Finn already said it. I'll just add to the party.

"We're all in the same boat sister"

I'm pretty sure with little differences we are all in the same daily grind. You pull your own weight you swim, you don't you sink.

"might as well make yourself a shining beacon of awesomeness right ? "

Find something you like and enjoy. Something that gives you life and energy. If you manage to make money doing something that energizes you it will be more like play and less like the daily grind. We are all dealing with the same thing. To find that elusive balance, our niche in the world that makes us feel human.

 

[Dameon]

Been there, done that, and life got a lot better once I got out of all that stuff. In the mean time, keep getting by.

 

[oldmanLee]

Hi Birdy
if you don't mind a creepy old fart dispensing advice,keep on reading.......







Well,you made it this far.You sound like a bunch of the kids in my neighborhood(and like me about 35 years ago!).You find the folks you bare surounded with deaf to the shout that is life and everything that it can be.GOOD!To tell the truth,I don't give a rat's ass for most people(to borrow from an old friend,they are wineskins half full of sour viniger),and the3 one's in my bneighborhood that I could reach out to;I went out of my way to corrupt.These were the things that I taught,with the hopes of seeing savages rise up from the mediocre.
Finish School.The tribes out in the world that you have to deal with to get where you want to go look on that piece of paper as some sort of holy relic.Play the game enough to have what you want.
Work on your art:I still do,sometimes I even make money at it,and it helps to calm and use the rage.
Every day,READ!I don't mean something you are familiar with,I mean something that challenges you and streaches your mind(might I suggest you look up Beryl Markham,she might give even you pause ).Nothing like seeing a group of kids discussing Plato's concept of implied by the observer reality(The Cave) on a front porch,as every body is getting a bit shelacked on Bushmill's.
KEEP YOUR RAGE................MOST IN MY GEN GAVE UP AN BECAME YOUR PARENTS

 

[dirty_rotten_squatter]

I know exactly how ya feel yo! It's depressing when you think about it, 8-10 hours a day, 5-7 days a week spent on working to live!! Being held down in one spot and doing the exact same routine over and over again until you're too old to do anything. I'll take my chances in the dirt and mud yo, if I die at least I'd be having a good time doing it and I'd know that I didn't waste my life being normal-ick

 

[Mouse]

been there, and it wasn't taht long ago so I can still remember how much it really sucked.

I had very few friends when I was 16-19, I didn't click with most people. those that I did click with lived to far away to be anymore than people I talked to while at school.

life is crap when you're young. you have nothing of your own and everyone treats you like a moron.

but this too shall pass.

 

[Ravie]

i'll be as blunt as i am to everyone. dont like it? dont do it. dont like it and still do it? well what is the intelligence in that? your not supporting a baby or a dying sibling are you? then your job is being held out of your own greed.

 

[Birdy]

I feel sooo much better now.
I decided to get away from all the bullshit for a night, so I went to a show with my friend and although it was screamo hardcore music, I still had fun and feel a lot better.