I'm terrible with introductions.

[ianfernite]

I'm also really bad at talking about myself, but I might as well tell you why I'm here:

I am in high school, and it's killing me.
Perhaps not literally, but damn close. They're trying to beat me into the desired shape, and all I've ever known to do is roll myself into the fetal position and try to wait it out. I've been 'waiting it out' for around seven or eight years now (or since I decided that school was no longer fun).

My wanderlust has been terrible for a few months now (or since I realized that you only need to be seventeen to drop out on your own). I have purchased a lot of traveling gear via eBay (a 0° sleeping bag, a yuppie hiking bag which I decided that I didn't like, a large ALICE pack, clothing, tools, etc). I've read almost everything there is online about riding freight trains (my main travel interest) and being homefree. I plan on working my way through this forum and gleaning as much information as I can. I hope to contribute to the community in some way, but I really don't have any travel experience (unless you count going to LES for a weekend, and to Richmond for Best Friends Day, both this past year).

More than anything, I am looking for a push in the right direction. All I hear from everyone I talk to is 'finish school, you'll regret it if you don't'. They don't seem to realize that I am seriously concerned about staying in school. I'm not sure how much longer I can take before I kill myself.

I'm not looking for pity. I come here in hopes of finding like-minded folks; people that I can relate to. I don't expect that, though; I've only found one person I could fully relate to in my entire life, and that didn't last long. I fear that I'm not capable of relating to others.

This is why I'm bad at talking about myself; I end up saying way too much, and making myself out to be pathetic. Maybe I am pathetic. Regardless; mental illness, wanderlust, and high school do not mix, and as aforementioned, it's killing me. I come to you all on my knees, for help and encouragement. I don't expect it, but I think that SOMEONE out there has to know how I feel. No one in this shit town does. Do you?

If you want to know any specific, general information, just ask. I can pour my heart out to no one, but can't list my favorite movies without being asked ... I don't understand it either.

Sorry that this was so long.

 

[soymilkshakes]

Oh man, I feel ya. High school is the worst. I used to cut class and walk to the public library just to be able to do something of my own choice, I felt so damn stiftled and restless.
I do think I could've helped my situation by indulging in stimulating, creative things. Indulging in art rather than drugs and bullshit.
But welcome to the site! Hope it helps, but try not to get too hung up in the internet world! Travel is amazing, but there are interesting things and people everywhere if you keep an open eye & mind to everything (Ha. I think I may be trying to give my past self advice).
By LES, do you mean Lower East Side?

 

[ianfernite]

Yes. I went up there by Amtrak/Chinatown bus.

 

[Angela]

Welcome, glad you found stp!
And now on a more serious note, do finish school! I don't know exactly how old you are but I'm guessing close to 16 since you mentioned your wanderlust increasing as you get closer to the 17 that's required to leave school.
As much as it may be "killing you" not to leave, you are still alive! It will be a lot harder out on the road or riding trains, especially if your under age. The folks that have any senses, including myself, will refuse to travel with you because your a minor and there is a good chance that other folks you run into will either feel the same or try to take adantage of you if they don't.
I know time seems to move so slow when your at that age, I'm sure you've heard that before. I'm at the age now where I'm trying to "drag my feet, to slow the circles down". Don't be in too much of a rush. Stockpiling the gear is great, just wait till your 17 or 18!

 

[Poe Boy]

Alright, dude, seriously, finish school. I know you don't want to hear it, but there it is.
Chances are, at some point in life, you'll want a job. Plenty of jobs, good ones even, can be had without a college degree. Almost none -- including shitty no-pay jabs can be had w/o a HS diploma or GED. If HS is that bad, see if there's a way you can attend community college to get a GED instead.

I would also seriously encourage you to NOT hit the road as a minor. Most won't want to travel with you, because you getting caught with them usually means prison time. Others, well, they like to use minors.. Because you have no choice to do what they want, or enter "the system".

In the mean time, STUDY. What I mean is, find out all you can about the places you might want to go. Find places to go. Traveling is a lot nicer if you have a destination.
I used to find a pla e I was interested in, go there, and work day labor or temp jobs for a week or three, get a few hundred $ saved (amazing how far that goes when you have no mortgage, car or insurance sucking you dry), I'd go around and see everything I wanted to see. When I got bored with an area, I'd move on.

So, hit some travel sites, get some travel books from the library (see, a good use for school time), buy a road atlas, and a railroad atlas. Learn about surviving. You won't always be in a city, but no matter where you are, you need shelter, water and food, in that order.

 

[pillowtron]

You said you're from pa right? Almost all of the PA school districts blow, i just recently graduated last year and i hated school too. If you ever feel like roaming around the general area for fun until you graduate and can leave for good let me know.

 

[Poe Boy]

I thought it was shelter, water, fire, and food in the order.

Depends.
The training I got included fire as part of the shelter section, since if you have a fire, you can have lees adequate "hard" shelter.

They may have done so to fit it in the "Rule of threes", so it's easier to remember:
3 Minutes without air
3 Hours without shelter
3 Days without water
3 Weeks without food

There was also "3 seconds without ammo", but that's for a military/firefight scenario, and out of scope for this.

 

[Arapala]

I am no formal education addvocate, but i must say. It is in your best interest to at least finish high school. It sucks i know, but it really is over sooner than oyu think. Then you are free to do anything, not to mention you made it so far already! I HIGHLY suggest to finish high school first. But hey, make the choice for yourself. i am not you so i can't really say. I'm just speaking from my expirecne. I finished, im glad i did, and it was over so fast.

 

[kai]

personally i dropped out of high school 8 years ago and until this point have felt no repercussions from it nor have i been denied any job opportunity i sought. i don't have a GED and i just say I graduated when asked. i have yet to have an employer look into this. the only thing that has been a burden on my job hunts is not knowing how to drive/having a driver's license. i don't necessarily think that dropping out is a great idea but for the most part i don't regret it and it hasn't been a burden to me. i can even go to university in canada now as a mature student without needing to prove i did well in school. you can also always go get a job in trades and just move up from there, provided you have the mental/physical capacity for it.

i do regret not taking advantage of all the things i could have learned in school for free that i am interested in...so i mean take advantage of what you can while you are there, i feel like you can make school work for you if you want to.

 

[ianfernite]

Thank you for your kind welcome!

I am seventeen, which makes it hard. One of these days I'm going to get pissed off and drop out on the spot. I kind of wish that would happen, because I need a push in any direction. I feel broken, and I'm not sure if I can take that leap completely on my own.

I definitely understand the part about being a minor. I'm trying my best to hold back on any illegal activities until I'm 'of age'; that way I can do jail time and not bring my mom into it. I like her a lot, which is good, I suppose, but it also holds me back a lot. I guess there are much worse things.

I would like to finish school, but it's weighing down on me, and I'm afraid of being crushed. I should probably talk to my mom about just getting my GED. Then maybe I could work a bit until I'm 18 (or not; I've a bit less than four months to go). I have an acquaintance who goes to a program that PAYS him to take classes; he gets about $24 a week. Although, I don't think I'd need classes to take the exam or whatever it is.

I might try to stick it out and glean what I can from it. It will give me more time for research and planning, considering I'll probably be alone the first time or few. I'm getting St. John's Wort, which will hopefully help.

On a side note, does anyone have any advise for dealing with manic depression and major depression? Also, does anyone know a non-prescription way to deal with asthma? I'll probably start a thread on that somewhere sometime; I don't expect to get many kicked down to me, and I really don't want to deal with going to Mexico to buy them.

EDIT: I searched the health forum, and found one herbal remedy. A question: will free clinics give inhaler prescriptions for free? I mean, will I have to pay at all? I've had insurance all my life, so I know nothing about that.

Another positive thing about staying in school will be time to learn an instrument! Does anyone have advise for something that's easy to learn and very portable? I've been thinking about a melodica. I have a hard time spanging, but busking will probably come easier for me.

 

[pillowtron]

For some reason my doctor INSISTS that i have cronic asthma, my allergy doctor that i used to go to accidently put me down for that and now i get bothered all the time with it. I'm pretty sure i could get inhalers, and i have health insurance luckly so it would be free or damn close to it. Since i DONT have the fucking asthma they insist i do maybe ill just get some of those inhalers and give them to you.

I'll let you know then

 

[ianfernite]

That would be ridiculously cool of you!

 

[Angela]

Also, does anyone know a non-prescription way to deal with asthma? I'll probably start a thread on that somewhere sometime; I don't expect to get many kicked down to me, and I really don't want to deal with going to Mexico to buy them.
EDIT: I searched the health forum, and found one herbal remedy. A question: will free clinics give inhaler prescriptions for free? I mean, will I have to pay at all? I've had insurance all my life, so I know nothing about that.

Yes free clinics will definitely give you inhalers, if they have them on hand. I've been getting them that way for quite awhile now when my asthma flares up. Just recently though they've gotten more expensive since they switched to the HFA inhalers but a 60dose inhaler can be obtained by prescription at Walmart for $9 if the free clinic runs out of them. Corticosteroid inhalers like Flovent or Adavair cost a lot more though, but can with quite a lot of paper work, be obtained free of charge from the pharmaceutical companies that make them if you have little or no income and most free clinics will usually help people with this paperwork. Some free clinics also get samples of these that they will give to folks that need them.

 

[ianfernite]

Awesome. My asthma isn't terrible, but bad enough that I have to use an inhaler every day.

$9 isn't bad at all; I probably couldn't buy them off of some underage kid with health insurance for that much, as was my initial plan. Haha.