getting really tired of people being all up in my business like they own me.

[Mouse]

Yeah, So after a long shitty summer I mananged to save up enough money to earn myself a weekend off. And, I went to RVA for best friends day and had a huge blast and it was the best time ever.

I told everyone I was going. I even told my mom.

Now, I never actually told my brother, whom I live with, and pay rent to do so. but I figured, tell mom, she whines a lot, so he'll find out from her. that's how my faily dynamic works.

my family is a bunch of jackass control freaks who constantly judge me on everything I do, whether it's good of bad or completely mundane - if I did it, it's probably wrong or evil or deranged.

So, I got back home today. Unpack my bag, the house is empty because my brother and sister in laws at work. getting cleaned up and getting my shit situated after my trip. And I realize I gotta pay a bill online i had almost forgotten about. So I turn on the computer and I get to see this lovely photoshoped rendition of me and my boyfriends faces implanted into a picture of two people riding a bike and on it it says "Best Friends or Bust"

Seriously, WHAT THE FUCK? I know my sister in law made it because she's a graphic designer. I know she put it up on the desktop to piss me off. and the reference to Best Friends day was there to say "we know what you did you sack of shit"

And they wonder why I don't make a point of telling them about my personal life? Why in the hell should I have to explain in detail everything I plan on doing and have to rationalize it to them (most people you can just TELL and they are "ok, cool have fun" but my family, if I tell them I'm going on a trip they act like the world is coming to an end.)

The best part is, for the past 2 weekend in a row they have both run off for long weekends to go to Erie for weddings. They never actualyl TOLD me they were going, I managed to find out in passing and I asked them When?Where? just so I would know because I wanted to clean the house before they got back home so it'd be nice when they got back from their trip. And even, when they both went the first time, I texted my brother as asked "how was the trip? make it up there ontime? when will you be coming back on Sunday?" just to see what was up. And I got no response what-so-ever and so I left it at that. I didn't bother asking questions the second time because I figured, it's none of my business and I really don't care what either of them is up to all the time anyhow.

So, why, when I plan a trip, do they expect me to give them some special curtesy of giving them my itinerary and giving them the 411 on my whereabouts on daily basis?

I will admit, I didn't tell them. I pretty much didn't tell them on purpose for several reasons. Becuase I didn't feel like hearing their shit. and sometimes, I like to escape far away from this place and my family and have some ME time and have fun on MY terms and not have to answer to them for things that don't matter. I finally told my mother where I was going about 2 days before I left and I got the exact respones I expected... a gruf angry sigh, an eye roll, and dead silence. AKA Judgement, and not the nice kind.

Fuck, I didn't even do anything bad. You can ask Ray Beez and Ian (if they were paying attention), at the bike lot show I didn't even drink.. never touched a beer all day. In fact, I only drank a few beers at Hadad's lake the day before and then went and chilled at the river with my friends after and we had run out of beer and it was after 2 and I wasn't even that drunk by that time. One night I even spent chilling at my girl Victorias house with her roommates and my friend Redd and we played fucking Apples to Apples for 3 hours and I drank diet coke while they get hammered.

I'm just super pissed off and insulted at the assumptions my relatives make and the backhanded bullshit they try to do to me under some rationale that since I fucked up in the past it means I'm worthless now and can't be trusted and don't deserve to enjoy life.


and people wonder why I up and ran away from home as soon as I possibly could to escape this horrible town and the pathetic life I've been expected to live because its the life they choose to live.

FUCK OFF AND GET OUTTA MY BUSINESS!

 

[ianfernite]

and people wonder why I up and ran away from home as soon as I possibly could

Honestly, if they still don't treat you like an adult, I only wonder why you still put up with them!
You were very well behaved at the Bike Lot, haha, and since I didn't see you going off a rope swing naked, I assume you were pretty well behaved at Hadad's as well.

 

[Mouse]

hahah. yeah my clothes stayed on til I got to my friends house.

I really don't put up with them very well. I'm stuck here because I have to be for the time being. Probation makes strange bed fellows.

I'm just so sick of them all acting crazy and rude and then looking at me like I'm a psycho when I act out out of frustration.

I found out tonight that my mother constantly comes into my work when I'm not around looking for me and bugging my co-workers about my whereabouts on a weekly basis. Now that's some crazy stalker shit right there. No wonder my boss hates my gutts. He must think on my days off I go on crack benders and my mother has to hunt me down. hahah.

Kill me. Please? These crazy jackasses are seriously going to make me homicidal.

 

[Rash L]

DEEEEEEEEP breaths in.... hold.. and exhaaaaale.... just gotta remember the situation is just temporary, it will be over someday.... inhale..... exhale.....

 

[Mouse]

yeah I know.. I'm pretty much over it.. but if I hadn't ranted on here I probably would have exploded on them as soon as I saw them, which I didn't. and they didn't try to get pissy with me when I came home last night sooo I guess this has passed. The tacky and insulting picture is still up on the computer.. I'm think of making one myself...

how does side-show giant standing next to the bearded fat lady w/ their faces on it sound? (my brother is like 6'4'' and she's a total fatty so I think it works. lol.) yeah, probably wont do that but it's funny to think about.

 

[nivoldoog]

I think the picture is funny, sounds like something i would do.... lol...

Best friends day or bust... lol sorry its clever

 

[Mouse]

eh.. after some of the shit I've had to deal with in terms of fmaily crap lately the last thing I needed was for one of them to make some insulting picture like a 12yr old dillhole. I mean, really? that's what a 28 year old person does to fuck with someone?

there's a lot more to this, obviously. I've got a thick skin when it comes to shit but lately I've just gotten fed up with all of them and all their shit. This was kinda the last straw on my back.

 

[Mouse]

so I came home to a lovely note in my room tonight.

aparently my brother is being pissy because I asked him to help me fix my scooter tire, which blew out on my two weeks ago when I was on my way home from work.

He seems to have some impression that I don't have the right to do what I want this the vehicle I own because he helped fix the tire.

the important part is - he hates my boyfriend. keep this im mind.

so, the deal goes
-flat tire.
-boyfriend helps me get to and from work for 2 weeks til tire I ordered arrives
-I pick up the tire (no transportation, mind you, I found a way)
-I ask my brother to help me save the $75 they dicks at the bike store were gonna charge me and see if he could put on the tire
-tire fixed
-I go to work, do my shit, ect.
-I had my trip planned a month ago. I had made arrangments to get to my train in the event that my tire was still flat. my tire was not flat, so I changed my plans.
- I went to aberdeen to catch the train at 4 a.m., I left my scooter with my boyfriend for safe keeping. had my tire been flat still, my boyfriend woudl have picked me up and dropped me off instead. This woudl have taken an extra 2 hours of travel time in the wee hours of the morning. I decided I woudl rather take myself to the train and leave my scooter with him. Made sense to me.
- now my brother is pissed off at me. I get a note saying "I thought you needed your scooter fixed for work"

so somehow, I'm a big fat lair or something because I stuck to plans I had made a month ago despite what happened the week before??? hmmmmm

he did this to me before. When TJ and I broke up I moved in here. We have since gotten back together and my brother hates it. So now, he's finding any reason to invade my life and be a dick over this stuff. Sorry, but I will do what I want when I want. Yes, I asked you for help to fix my tire, big deal? I still needed it fixed no matter what because I did have to get to and from work just like everyone else who has a job has to do. And yes, I do use my ride for extra-curricular activies like going to the bank, going out with my boyfriend, and taking trips to other states to have fun. Fucking AMAZING, isn't it? I'm suck a fucking bitch, aren't i?

 

[Rash L]

i can see why you would be pissed. tell him to fuck off!

 

[finn]

You can always try pretending to be a well mannered and emotionless robot, which is what I do when there is someone I have to deal with but also stay on good terms with. Give him a note thanking him for helping you and tell him not to worry, because you have your transportation logistics figured out.

 

[Mouse]

eh, that's pretty much what I did. I realized I did kinda pull a dick move by leaving and not telling anyone, it's understandable he woudl get mad about that.. but that's always how I roll. even as I kid I used to go off in the woods for hours by myself and hide from people.

I like to run away and hide for a few days out of the reach of everyone's radar so I can regain some of my long lost freedom and decompress from all the shit I put up with in daily life.

I guess this doesn't make sense to some people. oh well.

 

[finn]

Hopefully things are getting better then, it really sucks to be in a place where people resent you being there. Just remember that you have to give them an 'out' so when they are being upset and shitty without any good reason, they don't get more resentful at you, not matter how satisfying a "you are undeniablely an asshole/idiot/etc" moment might be. I can also relate to the whole disappearing thing, I'd do that all the time, going for walks which were hours long- weirdo stalkers would give up on following me even!

 

[ray beez]

im sorry all that shit happened to you. sounds like a bunch of poop. my family arent happy with the things i do, but that doesnt make me a bad person, im holding a job right now and can take care of myself and im appeasing them for the most part right now by going to school, they know this summer i might not be around, but they dont really pay too much attention to the stuff i do outside of the work, school business because i think they want to think i am their version of normal. my family is super cliche conservative. i've always told them the truth when they asked. and they've seen me at my roller derby bouts and decided to stay out of my personal life, because they feel wierd about it? maybe? but i'd be pissed too, if they joked around about something i do that they clearly know nothing about

 

[connerR]

Every time I read this title, I read it in the voice of some down South urban black lady.

Regarding the subject, it really doesn't make sense to me because my family is pretty understanding. I tell everyone in my family everything and if they don't agree with whatever it is I happen to be doing, then they at least give me the chance to explain myself and almost always respect my wishes, regardless of how they feel at the end of the day.

To me, I think your family doesn't understand you, nor do they want to understand you, so perhaps you've become...I want to say inferior, but it isn't the right word. They care about you, but they don't think you're doing what's right and end up handling it all wrong, treating you like you've got a disease or something.

*shrug*

 

[Mouse]

^ it's pretty much true. my mom started going to AlAnon meetings because her new "thing" is that her daughter is an alcy and she needs help to fix me.

sorry, but last I checked I'm a full time college student with a full time job and I maintain a 3.7 gpa and have a 401k and money saved up... and a lot of this was done while spending each weekend last summer in jail paying my "debt to society" and paying fines and going to stupid drug classes they forced me to do.

and I drink MAYBE 3 times a month, give or take.

but I'm a total fuck up. yep!

she even accused me of being on drugs when I was getting pissed tested randomly 2 times a month and kept coming up clean. tell me how THAT's possible?!

 

[connerR]

You don't sound too different than my sister. She's pretty good now, but the past few years were full of drugs and alcohol and visits from police. So even now that she (appears) to have her life pointed in the right direction, my family (myself included) still holds her under close scrutiny.

You can't forget things about a person's past. Now, in your case, I think it's irresponsible for your family to go to those lengths (your mom going to AA? I think she's missing the point), they should recognize that you may not be the same person you were, but it's always going to be in a person's mind.

How close are you to your family if you don't mind me asking? Perhaps you need to sit down, as a family, and find out who you all are?

Regardless, I think your family cares about you - they just haven't figured out how to show it the right way, yet.

 

[Mouse]

I don't feel close to my family. I generally don't feel close to anyone and they are no exception.

I can recognize my past mistakes and realize that these things just don't go away but really, I was never THAT bad to begin with (compared to a lot of people I know, I'm a saint and the constant voice of reason) but my family always believes the worst and makes all types of assumptions about what I was doing back then... they were usually a few states away so hwo can they know what I was doing? a lot of my time spent traveling wasn't as devious as they think... but I guess that's their problem.

Sometimes I wish they could meet some of my friends that are out in other states. If they could see how highly these people reguard me and how nice those people are, I think my family would finally get a better picture of my life. But, sadly, they wont meet them and they will probably never get to see that side of my life.

oh fucking well!


I know they all care, but sometimes they just annoy the piss out of me.