How much do you know about automobiles ?
I was in Baltimore(West too) and I'd parked my bike by an old tire shop that ran by what used to be a successful highway. I used a leg iron to tie me to the bike.
When I woke up the next morning, nothing. I tried using the electric leg and realized I'd been there 4 days, the charging system was weak on that '86 EVO, and over the 4 days in the snow, battery was dead. I finally remembered that I had used a pair of wire ties to put the kicker arm in my tool kit. I walked West Baltimore, scared shitless that bike wasn't going to be behind that shop, with a kicker arm in my hand looking for a place that cut up scrap metal so I could find something to get brazed or welded on as a pedal. I found out a scrap heap and a pile of bicycles isn't a hard thing to find in Baltimore. I trucked my ass back to shop, aligned the splines, used a little brass hammer to get the arm back on, tighted the hex key with a set of torx bits, and after it nearly tearing my acl, I got it kicked. Never so glad to see a city in my rear window.
Is there any chance you approach the service manager, tell him whatever about getting some money wired and want to check the battery with his ammeter ? Are you sure a jump wouldn't get you going and keep it going until you can get some green for a battery?
If you know for sure it isn't the battery, what kind of van is it ? It could be something silly and easy to fix depending on mfg and year even if you don't know what you're doing.
Keep your head up kid, the snows melt, and the sun will shine after the darkest night.