I need advice...ASAP

[Beegod Santana]

Why are we even talking about this?

Cause I'm bored as shit in Nevada and my lady friend is three big states away.

Ya'll can thank me later for turning this from a thread asking for relationship advice into a discussion on the merits of jacking off in front of computer screens / cameras.

Cause that's how I roll.

 

[whaleofashrimp]

nevada...now theres your problem

 

[Pheonix]

Well thanks for the reassurance but....She really doesn't seem like the shy type...although she did seem shy at that instant with the chuckling and smiling but...fuck it...i'll just chat with her a little bit on thursday see how things go...act natural, as though nothing happened. I probably just scare her...

she's not the shy type but she was shy at that instance.

dude, man... she wants you to be more assertive.

 

[Earth]

I suppose I should say something here, and against my better judgement I shall.

About 2 years ago, now... I was in the midst of an intense relationship with a woman I met at the plant who moved here from outta state.
I decided upon seeing her 1 year previous to this that I needed her to be mine.
Crazy, huh??
I was going through the exact same thing you are.
Then, it clicked when I least expected, and man it was great.
(for about 3 months, maybe 4...)
Afterwards, I went through a period of maybe 3 months of purgatory followed by a solid year of hell.
Why??
Damn good question, which I still never figured out myself.....
I do know this:
She wanted complete freedom to do anything she saw fit to do, including leaving me - at any moments notice.
Now - I'm cool with that - but why jump a broom with someone you care less about??
So, I guess I kinda turned the heat up a little bit and 'encouraged' her to get the fuck out since that's all I ever heard her complaining about, the whole being trapped thing... Fine, get the fuck out.
Now, I am free - and happy.
AND I GOT THE DOG!!
WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER!!

(opps, sorry....)

Ok - here's the deal.....

Rule 1: It is the fool who goes where the wise man runs away
Rule 2: Doing most of the giving (remember, relationships are about give and take) is ok BUT DON'T DO ALL !!
Rule 3: Never sell out, or sell yourself short either for that matter.
Rule 4: Never compromise who you are / what you are about either (I guess that's Rule 3 in a way...)

Fuck playing games - this shit between girls saying something but really meaning something else.
I'm a hard motherfucker and I take everything at face value.

Last but not least: You are a human being - always remember that - and there's nothing wrong with writing something emotional on-line about / to somebody you care about / for... and if they / somebody's got a problem with that, then tell them they can go fuck off!!

God Be With You...........................

 

[slurricane]

i thought youd never met this girl..so what exactly would be a smile and a chuckle?

 

[AnarchistRon]

I should probably have given more detail...we go to the same class. afterward i just approached her, asked her whether she'd recieved her notes from the teacher, because she was absent the day before (i had initially planned to offer the notes to her if the teacher said no), she said that she had, and so i said something along the lines of: i was wondering would you be interested in having a cup of coffee with me sometime... to which she chuckled, smiled and said she was very busy with work and studying, and she concluded it with i'm sorry. I then said its fine, i'll see you on thursday and walked off.

 

[Pheonix]

yea, you probably still had a chance until you apologized.
real men don't apologize for being men.

 

[CXR1037]

When I look at what the Internet has done to my generation it makes me want to cry.

cxr - disconnected

 

[AnarchistRon]

if she really liked me that wouldn't matter so much and she would probably have said yes initially. I mean...this woman is really stunning and very sociable...she's probably approached by many men.

 

[scatwomb]

I dunno Ron, if she laughed at you when you asked her out, that's not a good sign. In fact, something like that indicates arrogance and carelessness on her part, not something I would personally look for in a partner. Or, SHE JUST DOESN'T WANT TO GO OUT WITH YOU - get over it.

When I was in college, I would get tons of "dates" by just asking questions about the class or notes to girls I had crushes on and would say "well, I'll be studying at so-and-so place with a friend, if you wanna come along." Sometimes girls said "no, that's cool" and other times we studied together and it lead to other things. It's a passive strategy, but, I wasn't looking only to fuck them - I wanted to get to know them because they seemed interesting and/or cute or whatever.

But yeah, don't get all dramatic and shit if some girl doesn't want to get coffee with you. One will eventually, and you'll probably have loads and loads of degrading sex with her!

 

[whaleofashrimp]

u know what women hate/ a man who loves and cares about her feelings..treat her like shit..shell turn around

 

[AnarchistRon]

She didn't out right laugh...she chuckled and smiled unconsciously, it was obvious that it was not a forced or conceited laugh...i'm thinking about this too much again, but that's the sort of person I am....i think...a lot...not just about her, but in general.

i don't understand why people always interpret my writing as overly dramatic, i'm really not...it's just the way i write. I like this girl...more than i have ever liked any other...and would like to get to know more about her if possible.

this will sound perplexing to some and gay to others, but i don't give a rat's shit about the sex...she is nothing short of the most stunning woman i have set my eyes on...but i don't care about the sex right now. i just want someone to hold, someone with whom i can share my secrets and thoughts, someone who's mere presence will relieve me of all the burdens in life...someone i can worry about so that i won't have to worry about myself.

 

[Pheonix]

a giggle is not always a laugh it is sometimes a flirt, and what I got from the first part is not a "no" but a not right now. apologizing for a flirt or come-on is dumb, just continuing to talk about the turn down is a stupid thing to do. I think he would benefit from your passive strategy, scatwomb, but not if he 's going to be suicidal a wanna cut his wrist every time he gets rejected. I hate to say it but suicidal people shouldn't be in a relationship cause they never end well and always end with emotional baggage. he says he scared her with the facebook post but she ain't scared until they shack up and he threatens to kill himself if she leaves. I guess what I'm trying to say is suicidal people make bad partners, so good for her, she avoided a trainwreck by saying no.

 

[whaleofashrimp]

i hear ya man...but us kind senseative men..we fail at being our selves so we have to go out of our way and deuch it up to be taken seiously

 

[TheUndeadPhoenix]

Ron, what ever you do, do not get into the FRIEND ZONE.

 

[AnarchistRon]

xD I wasn't serious about the suicide...i should probably have said that..then again, i didn't expect anyone to take it seriously.

 

[AnarchistRon]

Ron, what ever you do, do not get into the FRIEND ZONE.

I'd rather get into the friend zone, then lose her entirely.

 

[scatwomb]

someone who's mere presence will relieve me of all the burdens in life...

Potential partners can sense this type of desperation. If any girl falls for it, she will also be pathetic in many ways. My advice is not to try and find happiness in another person, but, to be happy with yourself. Once that happiness and the calmness it facilitates comes, the ladies will start rolling in - think of all the bosoms you can cry on You seem to suffer from some sort of clinical depression, so, I don't think it will be easy for you to attain happiness alone, I dunno.

Oh and, I don't think the way you write is dramatic, I think the way you seem to be acting is. I mean, shit, you said you were going to kill yourself (I assume you were joking) if she didn't reply to your Facebook post.

I still love you though. Anarchist solidarity and the like...

 

[TheUndeadPhoenix]

I'd rather get into the friend zone, then lose her entirely.

Good point

 

[scatwomb]

I'd rather get into the friend zone, then lose her entirely.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO