train life and love

[chickenbone]

I have been dating this girl for over a year and we are even engaged. She was complacent with our relationship status since the job I had was EXTREMELY secure. but not so long ago I did something to get my ass fired and when they said I could leave i got a feeling that I hadnt had since I was 16, WANDERLUST! I started to plan my way across the country to grab her at home and hope to never repeat the same mistakes I had mad, you know, employment. This revolutionary new concept was lost on my future wife and has since been the reason our relationship has quickly turned sour.

is it strange to say you promise to go to school, get a job, get married, and travel only by plane or car, to want to puke afterward and immediatly hang up the phone?

I would just like some input and any advice would be cool. just curious as to what you think since I already know what will happen next.

 

[Kagu]

I guess if the whole "employment, settle down, grow up, and travel by car" thing isn't for you then the decision is pretty easy to make. I think as long as you walk the line carefully and with a few lucky breaks you can definitly do a little bit of both. Then again though the mirror of the whole thing is true for her then as well. I dont know, I guess only you can decide that one and if neither one of you can come to terms with the other then maybe its better off over. I would try to set up a compromise first though and convince her to travel(maybe you already did?) with you for awhile if you work or go to school for a little bit and maybe she'd be more inclined to move a little closer to your side. Even though its corny and cliche only you can decide whats right for you. If others can come along for the ride, thats great, but if not then the roads kind of seperate.

 

[bakerdoo]

If you feel like you are selling your soul to make this girl happy (in my opinion) dont do it!!! Education is always good and supporting yourself and loved ones is good but traveling by car/plane is not so good. If these are things that you will feel guilty about dont do them...Thats like putting on sheeps skin even though you dont want to. I think that if compromise is possible do it but dont give up on your beliefs, i cringe everytime i see my friends take full time jobs in an office and get married and sit around and watch TV and eat TV dinners (not like thats what your going to do).
hope that wasnt too much of a rant. trying to help
Good Luck Man

 

[Doobie_D]

And thats my final thought. Until next time. Take of yourself and each other

 

[chickenbone]

thanks, that was pretty much my take on the situation. that whole wanting to puke at the thought of a regular job actually happened a couple of days ago. I said something along the lines of "I promise I will come home and stay...uuuuggghhhh!" drama drama drama

 

[anyways]

You have to do what feels right by you. Living your life for someone else is no way to live at all. I know how you feel, sort of (minus the marriage thing)... I moved down to Austin from RI and had tentative plans to go to school and get a place and shit (which I was mostly going to do to please my dad) ... I stayed in that town for a month or so meeting all these train riders (which I hadn't before) and felt my heart break every time I turned down an offer to go along with them. I didn't want the life I came down there to live, and I never had. I was forcing myself into it to please someone who I cared about and loved (like you're doing). In the end, I had to be honest with myself and stop denying my true gut feelings... Hit the road and been a much happier, saner person.

Good luck in your decision, I hope you make the one that's true to YOU.