The Day That No Fucks Were Given | Squat the Planet

The Day That No Fucks Were Given

Shwhiskey Gumimaci

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So up until a few days ago I was staying in Slab City at the Library with @Cornelius Vango @EphemeralStick @Matt Derrick @creature and a few others. We didn't do that much, mainly just bathed at the hot springs, got fat eating @creature 's delicious food, built a fence, and did whatever we could to entertain ourselves. One morning a few of us were just shooting the shit and decided we were gonna make a short movie about "Not giving a fuck". The premise of this short movie is there is an old farmer showing his son a barren field. A field where fucks used to grow. But there are no more fucks and the world has become a much darker place. The point of me posting this is we need ideas for one liners for the short movie, such as "Children play in the gutter and play with glass, but no one gives a fuck" or "There was once a fuck to give but there are no more. All the fields of fucks are barren" and so on. Not looking for people to say how stupid this idea is, we know it's stupid, we're just looking for help with one liners. Any help is appreciated.
 

EphemeralStick

Andie of the House of Queer
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"LOOK HERE CHILD! Gaze upon this field on which we used to grow our fucks. For many a generation not single fuck was had to be given! Only the oldest of our town can barely remember the glimpses of fucks shining in the summer sunlight. For then they were rich and bountiful! T'was a dark day indeed, my child, the day there were no more fucks to be given."

Roll opening credits.
 
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Kim Chee

Guest
A fuck not given is a terrible thing to waste.
Friends don't let friends give fucks while drunk.
Don't bogart that fuck, my friend pass it over to me.
A fuck saved is a fuck earned.
 
K

Kim Chee

Guest
With the shortage of fucks, he knew that his fuck seeds were going to be his ticket out of poverty.

When the last fuck plant dies the music will stop.

The plot was diabolical and genius at the same time. Monsanto quietly killed off all of the heirloom fucks to sell GMO fucks which only looked like real fucks. The taste, nutritional value and the crunch weren't the same. People resorted to using dammits and gosh darnits instead. One inventive farmer had some dagnabbits left but not enough for everybody.
 
A

AnOldHope

Guest
Son, your mother and I have watched fucks come up on this land since before you were born. Your grandfather made fucks with an old mule while your grandmother worked the fucker churn. This country was built on fucks, but, I just don't know anymore....
 
D

deleted user

Guest
GrandPaw... What was it like?

Hwellll. . When I was a youngen. This was a looooong fucking time ago mind ya. We worked hard to get fucked. We didn't give fucks then during the depression, we had to fuck for ourselves. I'd be fucking up'n'down on that rusty old tractor over their for the whole family. Then the times changed, we started to give a fuck.
I went over to Germany and gave them all sorts of fuck. When I returned it was a whole new horizon. We could share the fruits of our fucks for years.
Now we gave to many fucks, got too many too. It brakes my heart you ain't ever gonna get the fucking that was the last century. Never know the joy of this field of fucks fruitful fucking. Ain't fucking right.
The fucking stopped, guess the Lord stopped giving a fuck too. all I got now is this last fuck for ya.

(At this point GrandPaw flips the kid off)
End scene
 

tacopirate

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Highway-Sign.jpg
 
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Kim Chee

Guest
To each person, having no fucks meant their lives were going to change in some significant way.

Some had to be satisfied with their fuckstick or borrow somebody elses.

Some decided to not even give a shit.

Others got together by the campfire and told stories about the good old days and the bounty of fucks.

Gramps said he had so many in the bank that he could live off the interest of his fucks alone.
 
  • Haha
Reactions: tacopirate
K

Kim Chee

Guest
The lucky ones were those who got fuckstamps from the government.

As the supply of fucks ran down, they became more expensive.

People who had fuckstamps were unaffected by the price increase and were able to trade their fucks for exotic cars and great big bags of Maui Wowie.
 

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