ok so i'm not really into sitophilia, or the form of sexual fetishism in which participants are aroused by erotic situations involving food, but i do have a pretty good story about a recent sexual advent i embarked on.
alright, so i was watching an episode of the show weeds online the other day and one of the main characters is a teenage boy who is just starting to masturbate. so when a plumber had to be called in to unclog the jizz-socks from the pipes, it was decided that the boys uncle would talk to him about proper masturbatory practice and hopefully clear up this sticky situation.
so anyway, when they sat down together one of the methods that was brought up was taking a banana, pealing it and then placing the peal over your scepter of love and using that as a source of lubricant and a suitable place to blow your load.
what can i say, i was intrigued. over a decade of servicing myself and i had never thought of this? i was ashamed. so needless to say when i was looking for a snack the other day, when i came upon the bananas (haha), i knew what had to be done. i'll cut out all the gross details, although if you've made it this far already...,anyway, it was amazing. thats the only way i can put it. it was almost like i was making love to a woman. or at least a human orifice.
so if you've made it this far, chances are you are as morally bankrupt as myself. so i don't know why i'm even bothering asking, but is it wrong what i did to that banana?
am i assured an eternal fate in the seventh layer of hell?
what if i told you i threw the peel in my families compost afterwards?
alright, so i was watching an episode of the show weeds online the other day and one of the main characters is a teenage boy who is just starting to masturbate. so when a plumber had to be called in to unclog the jizz-socks from the pipes, it was decided that the boys uncle would talk to him about proper masturbatory practice and hopefully clear up this sticky situation.
so anyway, when they sat down together one of the methods that was brought up was taking a banana, pealing it and then placing the peal over your scepter of love and using that as a source of lubricant and a suitable place to blow your load.
what can i say, i was intrigued. over a decade of servicing myself and i had never thought of this? i was ashamed. so needless to say when i was looking for a snack the other day, when i came upon the bananas (haha), i knew what had to be done. i'll cut out all the gross details, although if you've made it this far already...,anyway, it was amazing. thats the only way i can put it. it was almost like i was making love to a woman. or at least a human orifice.
so if you've made it this far, chances are you are as morally bankrupt as myself. so i don't know why i'm even bothering asking, but is it wrong what i did to that banana?
am i assured an eternal fate in the seventh layer of hell?
what if i told you i threw the peel in my families compost afterwards?
