Finding Myself

[jfinner1]

Hello everyone. My name is Jessyca, and I am 21 years old. For the past 21 years, I have been depending on other people. My parents, my family, my friends. I've had a few jobs here and there, but never anything that I could say was supporting me. I've flunked out of college, but now I'm going back, and after my first semester I have a 4.0 (yea...) but I'm not sure why I'm going. I've spent the last 4 years trying to figure out where I'm going and what I'm doing with my life. I recently realized that my biggest issue is my fear of independence. I just got my driver's license last month, because I was afraid of the independence of driving. I've never lived on my own. I plan to remedy this very soon. By the middle of November, I want to move to NYC and find a place to squat. I want to build something, by me, for me. I've spent the last few weeks reading everything I can on squatting, dumpster diving, living without, and I have never had a concept speak to me so loudly. My biggest concern right now is getting from Ohio to NYC, and taking care of my pet rabbit through everything. I hope to meet some people, and learn a lot more before I leave.

 

[fleeting.from.orthodoxy]

Good for you for wanting to find your independance.. make a change for yourself. It's amazing to see how much people want to change their lives, unfortunatly I find that people are too scared of the drastic change, and never actually go for it.
Good luck

 

[finn]

NYC is a pretty hard place to start, especially if you don't have friends around there to ease the transitioning in- especially during the winter. I've slept in central park and penn station, and it's not something you'd want to do very much. But anyway, to build some skills, habitat for humanity is a pretty good way to be introduced to carpentry. But just remember, to be indepedent, stay away from drugs, including cigarettes!

 

[jfinner1]

I actually have some experience in carpentry (rough and finished) and electrical work. I also have experience in masonry and drywalling, but I'm bad at it. Oh, and I've done roofing, and I was pretty good at that. I have no experience in plumbing, but I figure the best way to learn is to do. Besides, my dad is a certified pipe-fitter, welder, and plumber, so I can always call him for advice on that.

I'm hoping to find someplace to start before I leave, or at least get a few locations where you can crash out of the snow for a few nights. But I've been homeless in winter before. It sucks, but sometimes it can be freeing.

I am, however, going to buy myself a $70 pre-paid credit card before I leave, so if it gets too bad I have a way to get back to my parent's house... Just a safety precaution, and I hope I don't have to use it. But if you expect the worst, all surprises will be good ones.

I've never done hard drugs, and I don't think that I ever would. I smoked a bit of weed in Highschool, as a social thing, and I am a cigarette smoker, though I'm cutting back a lot. I only smoke 2-3 cigarettes a day, and maybe I'll even be able to quit entirely before I leave.

 

[Ahab]

Ohio is actually a pretty good squatting place if your gonna start, I suggest having 2-3 more people with you though. Try and join some travelers or something why don't ya? Freights are great to find yourself in.

 

[finn]

I'm a bit worried about the rabbit, I've never heard of anyone (aside from my ex anyway) who has done that- but that life really stressed them out and they didn't live all that long since they do tend to have weak hearts. Also, I wouldn't expect you to be able to quit smoking, since nicotine is a stress relieving drug, and well, you're going to be a little stressed with the change of pace.

Hopefully you know more tricks for staying warm in the winter aside from the store bought heater, but you should know that if you're looking for a job, the DC area is probably better, but the squatting (and basically everything else) is worse.

 

[IBRRHOBO]

well, that sounds real good. you have no street smarts, no mentioned gear, no money to speak of, no connections other than this forum you just found and you figure you will jump 'into the wild' so to speak. hmnn, and NYC no less in the dead of the winter.

i'm really suprised no one has spoke up here. perhaps the thought of a 21 yo girl that they might be cool to...ach, never mind. look, do yourself, others and the morgue a favor and take a raincheck on heading out to NYC in the winter. first, the $70 prepaid cc is neat and will probably give a needy crackhead a hit when he mugs you; i mean do you think you're just gonna jump on the ol greydog and hop off and wander into central park and it'll be a jack kerouac novel? second, start local. make ur bones where you can still use that safetynet of urs. and a rabbit? i've heard it all now! i just thank G-d ur not on the trains! fuck it, i've written too many times on this.

maybe start a thread ASKING for some advice on the where and how then decide what ur gonna do.

 

[jfinner1]

Well, I don't know why I'm bothering, but I feel the need to defend myself a bit after that last post. I'm not quite so naive as I may sound at times. First, you mention my lack of street smarts. I'm not sure where you got this impression, perhaps because I did not completely explain my past. I don't want to bore you with long details, and I'm sure there are many people here who've had it much worse then I did as a child. But I was sexually abused for 3 years by my adopted father. I'm not telling you this as a "poor me, pity party" thing. I'm telling you because my past has affected my present, and it still affects my future. It's the past, it happened, I survived, but I have a strong resolve to never again be a victim. I may be a small woman, but I am now perfectly capable of taking care of myself in the sense of self defense.
When I was 14, I ran away from home twice in the dead of winter, and did just fine until I was dumb enough to go back to school. My education was very important to me at that time, what can I say. Then, when I was 17, I spent two months living on the streets of Akron, Ohio, in December/January, because my mother didn't want me to come home for Christmas. So I know about the difficulties of living on the streets, sleeping in the snow, wondering where you're going to find your next meal. And I'll be honest, if I can put my move off until spring, I will. But I've been completely unable to find work in the area, and I'm not sure how much longer I will be allowed to stay with my family rent-free before I wear out my already shaky welcome.
I have been creating connections for about a month now, and I still have at least another month to solidify my plan. I did come here to ask for tips and advice, but that doesn't mean that I've come to you totally lost and unprepared. As for money and gear, I do have some. My gear isn't what it used to be, because most of my nice camping stuff (lightweight tent and sleeping bag rated to -10) were confiscated a few months ago when some hunters stumbled across my camp and called the cops. I was unfamiliar with the area, and I guess the area was a bit more populated then I had thought... *sigh*
Finally, about my rabbit. If anyone is equipped to handle the move, it's Xenos. He's an outdoor rabbit, so the cold won't effect him. He's already on a completely natural diet, so feeding him is as easy as a head of lettuce and some other easily found fruits/veggies. And he's used to moving. Sometimes, I swear he enjoys it. He's leash trained, and he has so much fun exploring new places. He's been moving in and out of homes, tents, and fields since I got him 2 years ago, and the only time he has ever had health issues was when I got it into my head that he would be better off in a stable home. He lost almost half his body weight in just over a week, until his new owner got ahold of me and asked me to come see him. They were very reliable people, and I know that he was well taken care of, so our conclusion was that he was depressed about being 'abandoned'. So he'll do better with me then without.
I'm not sure if any of what I've said will make a difference in your opinion about my preparations or motives, and I'm not even sure I care about your opinion. I just didn't want to come off sound like another punk kid whining about my life being so hard because nobody understands me, lol.

 

[hartage]

After reading this thread including the apparently partially offensive (to you) post. I think what was suggested was simply to try something more manageable for your initial outings. Maybe a city that is further south and not so winter miserable. Maybe a smaller city that would have more unoccupied (squattable) space. I don't think it was an intentional ding on your abilities or intelligence. Perhaps others have seen situations similar to yours before and they are trying to steer you towards a road that is just a touch less rocky. Much like that movie into the wild. So many people were already pointing him in the right direction. What he was seeking was right in front of him, offered to him. Yet he wouldn't have it. After his grand adventure, after leaving it all behind when it was too late, ultimately all he wanted was to get back what he already had. What he threw away.

I'm just sayin you don't have to pick cold ass, (in the winter) , rough ass new york. Something local to you perhaps. If it has to be far from where you are then maybe something far...... south. New Orleans ?

 

[oldmanLee]

Okay,you sound like you might have a chance,but shoot for a city that has a better winter. If I may suggest,try RVA.Starting to be a good place to winter up and has a fairly large traveling folk community(they are even starting to find out about each others existence!),college town(excellent dumpsterdiving),good library system(yes,we have the internet this far south),main travel corridor.Fairly good ops for work to make it thru the winter,and if you and the other kids can get it together,potential for a couple of great squats.Plus you get to ask advice of ancient old homebums like me and some other old travelers about how to get by,new skills,etc.Having lived in NYC back before they cleaned up Times Square,I can say that in the last few years,the place has become paraniod and raddled out ,and not a place to get started FROM.And here you can get a good coffee with refill for under $2(and a place to nurse it for a few hours as well).Further south may be even better,and some of the back edge of the Carolinas is gorgeous.Just my two cents.

 

[finn]

Well, I have to say that a milder winter is better, and NYC is definitely not what it used to be. Anyway, onwards to some tricks for squat winter survival: Squat candles are the easiest thing you can make aside from an open fire. It's basically a tin crammed with cardboard and paraffin wax melted in, and it burns mostly vaporized paraffin. You can use that to heat up water to put into bottles that you can put in your sleeping bag, and that will keep you as warm as a fire without the risk of burning down anything. Scrunched up newspaper can be put into your clothing and bag (it's noisy though) and cardboard is a nice mattress, and if you find a large enough box, a mini-room. I'll add to this later, since I have to go now...

okay, now just remember that insulation you scrounge up tends to be flammable, so it's a bad idea to have a fire going unattended. Also people tend to notice the flickering light. Pallets can also function as a framework for insulation, since you can cram newspaper (or in moist places, plastic bags) and you can string them together to make a small space. They're also great for raising you off the ground if the floor is wet. Watch for poking nail heads though, since they'll rip holes in sleeping bags and pads. If you have a ridiculous number of blankets, it's a good idea to use corrugated cardboard as a spacer, that way air is trapped between the layers and it'll be warmer. Trash bags filled with newspaper make nice blanket forts with a cardboard roof support. If you have a friend or access to a place with a microwave, you can heat up your water there instead and not even have to make a fire. Piss bottles can also keep you warm if it's really cold out, but keep it in a container that you will never mistake as a water bottle.

Never store water in glass bottles, because they will shatter when they freeze- basically. I mean, they freeze and then when they thaw it cracks the glass unless it all somehow warms up very gradually which doesn't happen. Now food, since you've lived in the woods, you should know to keep your food in metal containers, because rats will gnaw through plastic. You want to have fatty food, but don't skimp on the vitamins.

PS. please post pics of your bunny.