I've run into so many people that I can only call otherworldly. They shine differently from the rest. Not brighter...but differently. They stand out, catch your attention from across the room with a certain kinda look behind their eyes. A knowing gaze. Ageless face...20 years old as they look directly, wrinkles of wisdom around their eyes and cheeks as they look away. All share a similar posture. A cosmic kinda confidence...Fuck, even I dunno wtf thats suposed to mean. It seems they...find you. Just like Keisha in Santa Barbara. The barber and realtor in Sacramento. The wolf in the Trinity Pines National Forest. Just like this one did. I hop into her truck after we were introduced by this other woman I met at the gas station. The intersection of I-90 and I-15. We get to talking about spirituality, of course.
I know she's otherworldly because she began by talking as if she were Jewish, and then she dropped it all once we were suddenly standing in that field and began talking about the essence of it all, the source, and all the other things I'm slowly happening across out here. No longer vehemently Jewish, but a protector of Mother Earth. Special note was taken over how she said "what you all call Gaia". WHAT.
There's things you can only think about, there's other things you can only feel about. My vibrations rose in frequency and velocity in her prescence but time ceased. Can't exactly explain it. Words are a byproduct of the mind...this isn't one of those things the mind comprehends. Its of those things intuition feels. One of those things that just...is. We talk about the oneness of it all...and being in her prescence allows me to feel it deeper than I have since the LSD on New Years, the night I met myself.
My spirit.
At the end, she gave me these tiny leaves that looked like miniature marijuana leaves with extremely long stems. It had a fuzz on it...but it isn't the marijuana I know. Had a taste like that flowery taste of opium mixed with lavender and honeysuckle. Fruity...ish? We smoked it by igniting the leaves and holding them to the wind. They caught fire and smoldered. Hold it to the mouth facing the wind that the sunset was blowing at us...and its effects were unlike any drug I've experienced. I've done everything from weed to heroin to LSD to industrial glue to ether to pharmaceuticals to DMT and beyond. I LOVE drugs, and I know them all pretty well. They help me keep this train from completely derailing. This was legitimate space weed, fuck me if I'm wrong. Cosmic Cannabis. I've never felt spiritual energy flowing from my every pore before. She asked what I took the formation of rocks to be...the formation in the middle of the valley.
A wolf. With a lion's mane and tail. Talons for feet. What do I feel about it? Emphasis on the word feel.
...It wants to fly.
I was aware of the thing that connected the formation and I...I was aware of that spiritual plane on which reality exists. Where its all the same thing the more it all becomes the same thing... (dafuq!?). So aware of it that I truly felt the connection in a way I believed was capable of manipulating it like it was part of my body...cause...it is...as is everything.
????
So connected to it all that I could levitate the rock with the same kind of effort I would use to bend a finger, use my legs to walk, flex a bicep...but I didn't try. I was only meant to be aware of it. Understand I'm not crazy for thinking magic exists, and continue to prepare for... ...when the time comes...???
More importantly, and deeper than I can explain...it was an answer to the request for proof that it exists. A cautionary thing. "Don't fuck around and mess with it, just know it exists."
On the road, I've often killed boredom by toying around with ideas of magic. I've discovered two forms of it that we all posess and use every day. They can best be called "ego" and "consciousness", perhaps. Or "logic" and "emotion", maybe? We have minds, we have hearts, and we've used the two to create the world we have today. The two together have taught us that everything is the same thing...you can boil it all down to tiny little vibrations for now. (SHAMELESS SHOUTOUT TO QUANTUM MECHANICS FOR THAT ONE. THANKS BRO) We have science and spirituality. They once existed in polarities, these days they're starting to mesh. Religion took the helm til science reigned supreme -- God's children grew up. We turn precious metals into artificial intelligence that's learned to teach itself. Put a man on the moon and setup a place to kick it long term in space to do science. We cure the blind, print organs & skin, and defeat death every day. We heal with music. We HAVE music.
And culture.
We break hearts, and mend thm, too.
Split atoms & destroy empires.
Know what the fuck an atom even IS.
Look at the edges of our universe.
Genetic engineering. Biomechanical constructs. Prosthetics. Our bodies are playgrounds for science. Can we upgrade em? Defeat death?
We turn sunlight into electricity. Flowing water into electricity. Cars that drive their selves. We posess the cumulative knowledge of our species and can access it on demand with a few movements of our collapsible thumbs because a radio signal talked to a satellite in our atmosphere that relays your human requests to a box of organic compounds and electricity who provides you with a solution faster than you can fart. We can turn metal, minerals, and dead dinosaurs into fighter jets that drop nukes that can destroy our world. Found water on another planet. Shit we've created has exited our solar system. We know which galaxy we belong to, and how quickly our asshole neighbor is speeding towards us and trying to smash right the fuck against us. Bet by the time they arrive, we'll figure out how to push her away from us. Think...an entire GALAXY. Just..meh, shoved away.
Look what we've done this century. Andromeda is how far away?
That's...magic.
And so I've toyed with the idea, in a sense that I've communicated my will to the higher power and the line of communication was clear. Ask. Recieve. Thanks. Keep on rockin, baby. I've asked about magic. Inquired about its nature, and if it exists. Talking about the third kind, apart from mind and soul. And...It...does. Its the thing that happens when the intelligent mind and soul combine.
Isn't that...us?
And I know this is just the beginning. Something else has come. Something new entirely. Call it spirit, call it oneness, call it what ya will...its often beyond the constructs of the heart and mind. Nothing you can say will do it justice, because its beyond thought and feeling. Its a thing that has inflicted you or it hasn't. I mean it already has, you ARE it, but it sleeps within most. Fuuuucckkkiiinnnnnng WORDS won't do. I'll keep searching for the right collection of em' til the day I die. THE QUEST FOR THE PERFECT SENTENCE. THE ONE TO RULE EM ALL LOL. I sound crazy even to myself, but I look back with a clear and sober mind today and simply try to explain what was going on the time I smoked some fucking space weed. I heard her crying. I heard Gaia crying, and this otherworldly being wanted me to hear it clearly in the valley somewhere in Idaho.
What am I getting into? I feel like tossing away everything and pursuing magic, the spirit, the oneness. Some entirely new beast beckons, her faint roar sending shivers down my spine. I wonder if Alaska was a part of that call? WHAT IS IN ALASKA?
Sitting in a park in Tacoma, WA. There are birthday parties all around. An office party, too, and a kid just caught his very first fish over at the lake. Other children are singing and clapping, one just ate dirt taking a big fall off his bike. Andrew should be here in two hours, we're going to southern California for a party in the desert.
Couples bask in their own company, older folk are shuffling about.
And Gaia is crying.
What do I do?
What
Do
I
DO?
Fuck.
I'm toast.
