I am Rev. Theodore Bushpig. And I am NOT a panda. (1 Viewer)

Bushpig

Wanderer
Joined
Sep 25, 2019
Messages
159
Location
Indianapolis, IN
I am Teddy.
I am a traveler via walking and hitchhiking.
I like all sorts of music, movies, games, books, art, and people.
I am not a panda.
I am not an asshole.
I am not smart, sexy, cool, or tough.
I love meeting people and experiencing new things.
I hate jerks, phonies, mayonnaise, yappy dogs, Necco Wafers, my ex's ex, people telling me I need a new wallet, american and bleu cheeses, my sciatic nerve when it gets pinched, religious and political intolerance, and humidity.
Some of my favorite artists are Tom Waits, Takashi Miike, John Goodman, Irving Penn, Carlton Mellick III and Suda 51.

I've hitched across the US a few times. I'm preparing to hit the road again for a longer, less-planned out journey that will hopefully take me around the world. I'm excited to see places I've never seen in America, but stoked to finally travel internationally. I have open invites in Canada (friend), Japan (friend) and Germany (friend's dad). Hope to travel all over Asia, Europe, and Africa.
Talk to me about stuff!
 
Click here to buy the Anarchist's Guide to Travel!

Faceplant

Mmmm . . . Taste the Ballast!
Joined
Nov 29, 2018
Messages
567
Location
Boulder Creek Ca
Woah there... Ranch is mostly mayo!! 🤠

I make a loaded garlic mayo, similar to aoli, that I would challenge you not to like. I’ve converted people that swear they despise mayo.

Similarly,, I have met people that despise garlic, any type onion( shallots, leeks, etc.) and any kind of pepper. The idea of going through life without those is unbearable.

Chicken salad or potato salad with out some mayo is shite, except for Hot German potato salad that used vinegar and bacon grease as a base. No, yogurt is not a worthy substitute for mayo.


Most used condiment in the world for french fries? Mayo, not ketchup. Yuck.
 

WanderLost

Wanderer
Joined
Dec 1, 2019
Messages
193
Location
South
I make a loaded garlic mayo, similar to aoli, that I would challenge you not to like. I’ve converted people that swear they despise mayo.

Similarly,, I have met people that despise garlic, any type onion( shallots, leeks, etc.) and any kind of pepper. The idea of going through life without those is unbearable.

Chicken salad or potato salad with out some mayo is shite, except for Hot German potato salad that used vinegar and bacon grease as a base. No, yogurt is not a worthy substitute for mayo.


Most used condiment in the world for french fries? Mayo, not ketchup. Yuck.
Were you tryin to quote the OP? I love mayo especially mixed with other things like ketchup or some kinda hot sauce.

Your reply made me hungry though, so imma go eat now!

Also welcome to Mayo The Planet @Bushpig!
 

Bushpig

Wanderer
Joined
Sep 25, 2019
Messages
159
Location
Indianapolis, IN
Woah there... Ranch is mostly mayo!! 🤠
I know. As is honey mustard and basically all "creamy" dressings. No thank you. I hate to stereotype, but most black guys don't like mayo. I'm only half, but close enough. I may not have inherited the big dick and dance skills, but I got the mayo hate!
I make a loaded garlic mayo, similar to aoli, that I would challenge you not to like. I’ve converted people that swear they despise mayo.

Similarly,, I have met people that despise garlic, any type onion( shallots, leeks, etc.) and any kind of pepper. The idea of going through life without those is unbearable.

Chicken salad or potato salad with out some mayo is shite, except for Hot German potato salad that used vinegar and bacon grease as a base. No, yogurt is not a worthy substitute for mayo.
I love onions, garlic, etc. I'll pass on your offer. That German potato salad sounds bomb though!
Also welcome to Mayo The Planet @Bushpig!
thanks...?
That's just what a panda would want us to think!
Pic is me on the left.
 

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MFB

Wise Sage
Joined
Nov 15, 2012
Messages
759
Age
40
Location
CO
@Bushpig You a funny dood! :) Welcome.

This was a fun thread to read.

I always thought the same thing about black guys not liking mayo; always hot sauce.
they even made that joke in the movie Undercover Brother w Tim Meadows. Maybe.
Theeeennnn, I worked at this cheesesteak place when I was 20ish and every black dood that came in got extra mayo on their sammie....?..... So I've given up on trying to figure it out and have spent most of my time focused on the pickle matrix since then.

I am of the Mayo is Gross faction. Unless your in Europe and its real mayo and you got real fried potatoes to dip in it. American mayo is gross. We used olive oil for everything growing up.

Lastly @Bushpig sorry about your average sized wiener; out of curiousity; are the dance skills and big dick a package deal, or can they be mutually exclusive? Bc I always thought I would be a great dancer if I had a bigger wiener.
 

WanderLost

Wanderer
Joined
Dec 1, 2019
Messages
193
Location
South
I know. As is honey mustard and basically all "creamy" dressings. No thank you. I hate to stereotype, but most black guys don't like mayo. I'm only half, but close enough. I may not have inherited the big dick and dance skills, but I got the mayo hate!

I love onions, garlic, etc. I'll pass on your offer. That German potato salad sounds bomb though!

thanks...?

Pic is me on the left.
Damn you were serious about not bein a panda! Sooo wtf does panda mean to you, cuz i assumed it was about your name being Bushpig and i figured that was a name for Pandas. Then the tattoo and you said you were bi racial. Is Panda a derogatory term for bi racial?
 

Barf

Burrito fund contributor
StP Supporter
Joined
Oct 6, 2018
Messages
218
Location
NW Montana
Welcome

I also hate yappy dogs.

I like to sleep with a pillow between my legs because it helps with my spines alignment.

Don't even get me started on humidity. I lived in the south east for years. The asshole of America.

Welcome to the forum.

It's so nice to meet someone right off the bat that I have stuff in common with.

Don't be a dick.

Stay six feet away from @Juan Derlust

And I think you'll find this a well informed and welcoming community.

<3
Barf
 

Bushpig

Wanderer
Joined
Sep 25, 2019
Messages
159
Location
Indianapolis, IN
Lastly @Bushpig sorry about your average sized wiener; out of curiousity; are the dance skills and big dick a package deal, or can they be mutually exclusive? Bc I always thought I would be a great dancer if I had a bigger wiener.
I dunno. Makes the "dick slang" less impressive at least.
Damn you were serious about not bein a panda! Sooo wtf does panda mean to you, cuz i assumed it was about your name being Bushpig and i figured that was a name for Pandas. Then the tattoo and you said you were bi racial. Is Panda a derogatory term for bi racial?
Bushpigs are a pest species from Africa. No relation to pandas. Panda MAY be derogatory, but I prefer mule. If I were an animal other than human, I'd be a mule.

As for the tattoo and general disrespect for pandas, it's a kinda life philosophy I came up with back in 2007 or 2008 called De-pandafication. Pandas are stupid and lazy. They do nothing but sit on their fat assess and eat bamboo. All. Fucking. Day. They need to eat constantly because bamboo has almost no nutritional value. They're carnivores. Or at least omnivores. With fangs and claws. That eat plants. And they don't reproduce. They won't fuck to save themselves. They would be extinct without human intervention. They just sit and eat instead of trying to live. I don't want to be a panda. I want to live. To enjoy my life. To not sit around, waiting to die. I've lived like that. And I want to De-pandafy. Don't be a panda means don't be LIKE a panda. Live life! Enjoy it! Make it memorable!

a bunch of nice welcoming shit
Thanks! And I'll avoid Juan like bat soup.
 

WanderLost

Wanderer
Joined
Dec 1, 2019
Messages
193
Location
South
I dunno. Makes the "dick slang" less impressive at least.

Bushpigs are a pest species from Africa. No relation to pandas. Panda MAY be derogatory, but I prefer mule. If I were an animal other than human, I'd be a mule.

As for the tattoo and general disrespect for pandas, it's a kinda life philosophy I came up with back in 2007 or 2008 called De-pandafication. Pandas are stupid and lazy. They do nothing but sit on their fat assess and eat bamboo. All. Fucking. Day. They need to eat constantly because bamboo has almost no nutritional value. They're carnivores. Or at least omnivores. With fangs and claws. That eat plants. And they don't reproduce. They won't fuck to save themselves. They would be extinct without human intervention. They just sit and eat instead of trying to live. I don't want to be a panda. I want to live. To enjoy my life. To not sit around, waiting to die. I've lived like that. And I want to De-pandafy. Don't be a panda means don't be LIKE a panda. Live life! Enjoy it! Make it memorable!


Thanks! And I'll avoid Juan like bat soup.
Interesting philosophy. I wasnt expecting that. I asked my roomie what bein a panda meant and she looked it up and none of the stuff we mentioned on here came up lol. Panda's are weird!
 

WanderLost

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Joined
Dec 1, 2019
Messages
193
Location
South
Pandas are garbage. People make fun of Dodos. Dodos were hunted to extinction. Pandas would be extinct if humans left them alone. We work to save them, yet bees are dying out. What the fuck is wrong with people?
I know what you mean lol. At the same time i kinda sympathize with pandas. I mean maybe they just dont care to run a rat race. Its not like they asked for humans to step in and save them. I wouldnt be alive if it weren't for other people either to be honest, and sometimes i think about joining a monastery just to get away from everything. Life is pretty insane after all. Anyway just my take on it.
 

Bushpig

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Joined
Sep 25, 2019
Messages
159
Location
Indianapolis, IN
I know what you mean lol. At the same time i kinda sympathize with pandas. I mean maybe they just dont care to run a rat race. Its not like they asked for humans to step in and save them. I wouldnt be alive if it weren't for other people either to be honest, and sometimes i think about joining a monastery just to get away from everything. Life is pretty insane after all. Anyway just my take on it.
I don't like the rat race either. Quit my job to travel (shitty timing on that). But I still don't plan to waste my life doing nothing. Traveling doesn't have to be wild and crazy. I can move leisurely and still not be a useless bump on a log.
 

WanderLost

Wanderer
Joined
Dec 1, 2019
Messages
193
Location
South
I don't like the rat race either. Quit my job to travel (shitty timing on that). But I still don't plan to waste my life doing nothing. Traveling doesn't have to be wild and crazy. I can move leisurely and still not be a useless bump on a log.
Ok i feel ya on that. That is shitty timing on the travel thing though. Good luck out there!
 

Bushpig

Wanderer
Joined
Sep 25, 2019
Messages
159
Location
Indianapolis, IN
Ok i feel ya on that. That is shitty timing on the travel thing though. Good luck out there!
Thanks, buddy. I'm hoping to hit the road on the first of May. It'll suck if lockdown is still in effect, but I've grown sick of waiting. I've had to put it off already for injury. Now this. I'll be walking and camping a lot. Couchsurfing is pretty much out of the question. But at least I'll be fucking moving!
 

WanderLost

Wanderer
Joined
Dec 1, 2019
Messages
193
Location
South
Thanks, buddy. I'm hoping to hit the road on the first of May. It'll suck if lockdown is still in effect, but I've grown sick of waiting. I've had to put it off already for injury. Now this. I'll be walking and camping a lot. Couchsurfing is pretty much out of the question. But at least I'll be fucking moving!
Im sick of waiting too, but im gonna stick it out. Fuckin sucks though 😩
 

wizardclare05

Lurker
Joined
Sep 19, 2019
Messages
4
Age
23
Location
philly
Thanks, buddy. I'm hoping to hit the road on the first of May. It'll suck if lockdown is still in effect, but I've grown sick of waiting. I've had to put it off already for injury. Now this. I'll be walking and camping a lot. Couchsurfing is pretty much out of the question. But at least I'll be fucking moving!
Hi bushpig I have enjoyed reading all your posts on the and your initial introduction. I hope you have a nice adventure and are allowed to travel as you like without too much negative interference. If you would ever like to talk feel free to message me
 

Bushpig

Wanderer
Joined
Sep 25, 2019
Messages
159
Location
Indianapolis, IN
Hi bushpig I have enjoyed reading all your posts on the and your initial introduction. I hope you have a nice adventure and are allowed to travel as you like without too much negative interference. If you would ever like to talk feel free to message me
I might just do that! I see you're from Philly and I'm sure I'll visit there again. I've been to South Philly several times and might want some advice on where else to check out. I get chunky when I'm not traveling and last time I took a daytrip there (from my hometown of Williamsport), I ate 2 steaks at Jim's. My tummy was mad at me. It was worth it.

Anyways, yeah. Always down to talk!
 

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