I do have to explain consent as a kink. Because I myself understand how it would someone of my stature to unintentionally coerce someone, I started asking people to be explicit about do they want from you. I found people become delightfully uncomfortable while at the same time revealing their comfort level. I even coax specifics if they are being vague.
I used to spend time on hobbies and skills before my loneliness and longing for company led me out my room and to end supporting other addicts by working insanely long hours 60 to 70 a week at very exploitive workplaces and cast out when either I ran out of usefulness or started asking for people to help paying bills. I'm mostly searching for a place I belong but realizing that's not gonna happen so gonna blackmail my old boss with my unpaid overtime, other violations, using me to take food handlers exams for people who can't read English, and violations of the Americans with Disabilities or give me the car title, my last check any discrepancy in overtime hours and notarized copy of a release of title, try to get into this Android coding bootcamp and literally live out of my car at rest stops, learning on my laptop undernature letting other's know where I'm at for talking, sharing food and skills, offering rides if I can and just actually being alive again. I'm an addict so if you're not cool with it can't guarantee I won't be high but won't do it in front of you or talk about, and generally support any attempts at recovery or harm reduction. If you're an addict and accept it(don't know why but people who don't moralize their addiction and own it don't do the weird "not a true tweaker shit"while rifling your wallet). I don't know why but thinking about this through the lens of my fetish, being very specific about what I'm looking for is what I needed to do. Maybe looking an awesome place to belong maybe places should see if they need an awesome me to belong for a while. Need to start making a list of shit I want know . Relearn the clarinet, learn burman, maybe find temporary companions for an adventure. If nothing else sitting on my car a rest top trying to rig a solar panel battery for my laptop and phone sounds. If I'm going to be alone might as well enjoy the space. Sorry this may not make much sense but I think I have some forum threads to read.