One night in LA always crazy shit (1 Viewer)


Apr 2, 2018
Asheville, NC
I got outta norcal looking for a ride to Denver. Bam. Found one! Two nice Burning-man guys got me...but of course, the curve ball was that they wanted to stop in LA...and also wanted me to kick rocks while they visit their friends...
I'm just trying to get to Denver, so I say "oh I got friends there..."
I got friends almost anywhere in Cali EXCEPT Los Angeles. The only people I know there are retired rainbow kids with short-term memory...great kids, but probably have no clue who the fuck I am...and even if they did, I got no way to reach them.
But I say, 'FUCK IT!'
Spent my last 5 bucks on a beer at the cheapest bar in Hollywood and tried to figure out my shit.
I dont know jack about that place. I went to Hollywood six years ago to model and it was fucked off and ive hated the place ever since.
I love STP but didnt find any info on, like, a squat in Hollywood seemed rare, and annoying to try to scout out...shows what I know...

I'm at this bar and gliding through profile. I hit someone from the site up. Of course they insinuate they're expecting sex in exchange for the night.
Fuck couchsurfers. Never helped me.

So....I go out to raid the ashtrays of skinny filters, and I meet this woman named Tomarr. Red haired wasted lady with a good fashion sense...but something about her seemed familiar...
Maybe it was her teeth, her raspy drunk voice, or the tiny hole in the elbow of her Kashmir sweater...
Something about her...
So I tell this woman my situation. Immediatly she dubs me her new babysitter for her eight year old.
Then, she tells me I'm cute and I look like I could score free drinks from people at the bar.
And proof! She takes my hand and says, "were going bar hopping."
I'm like, down for anything, so fuck yeah. That PBR buzz is gunna wear off fast...
Ironically, I discovered that asking people to buy me drinks was a very, very easy score---COULD HAVE SAVED MY $5 TOWARDS A NEW CAPO!

I'm out with this very strange 42 year-old red-haired lady (who I am apparently babysitting for...) Whatever. She was crazy AF and i was happy to continue to bring her the drinks people were buying for me.
Then, all of a sudden, a man becons me to the back of the, mind you, I'm pretty toasted and so I jostle over without a thought. He opens this obscure door and motions me to go inside a little white room with just a sink and a toilet...fucking Hollywood.
In addition to the sink and mirror are three other women. Why was I not afraid? Booze. By this time, I got nothing in me but 3 shots of tequilla, one shot of vodka, and some trash-chips.
I don't know if it was meant to be the designated cocaine room...but that's certainly what it seemed like. Because everyone was putting keys up to my nose.
Haha, thanks everyone!
So we blew lines in this strange room, dranks free drinks, and I watch Tomarr dance up on the bar. Pretty fun night.

So its maybe like, 4am. Tomarr and me end up going back to her place....
And would you believe...
Tomarr was posted up at squat in Hollywood! A fancy as fuck one, too! It was up for rent, but the building was practically vacant. All it really needed was some electricity and I woulda thought she was paying rent. It even had that fresh construction smell to it.

Not gunna lie...being housed up at an actual residence would have been very nice, but I was honestly more relieved Tomarr was home-free, too. It just made a lot of sense.
I met her kid and her squatmates who were all really nice and seemed like theyve been there for years...when I guess they discovered the place only 3 weeks ago.

Unfortunately, I ended up ditching Tomarr the following morning and didn't end up babysitting her kid. A bit of a shame, but she was talking like we were partners or she didnt want me leaving and all these parties she wanted to take me to...

I love new experiences, but a night filled with LA yuppies, mixed drinks, and balls of cocaine was really, I'm just trying to get to denver...

Very nice of that man from the coke room to send me off with a little goodie bag. Another guy from the bar even got me a pack of spirits.

I talk a lot of shit about LA because because its a weird place. The experience was awesome, but something within felt very strange the entire time. Is it the city? I'm not sure...But honestly, it was probably the best night ill ever experience in LA.

These are really the experiences that I live for while traveling; finding crazy-cool people, partaking mind-altering substances, and getting back on the road before karma catches up with me...for what I'm not entirely sure yet.
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I'm a d-bag and got banned.
Oct 27, 2017
Flint, MI
LA scares me for the same sorta reasons Las Vegas does.
I wanna do non-hard drugs and end up somewhere safe, not dead in a dumpster (sorry, huge cliche and probably just me being really paranoid).

Now if I had GROWN UP in a big city... then I likely wouldn't be scared to p[arty at all.

Matt Derrick

Semi-retired traveler
Staff member
Aug 4, 2006
Austin, TX
I talk a lot of shit about LA because because its a weird place. The experience was awesome, but something within felt very strange the entire time. Is it the city? I'm not sure...But honestly, it was probably the best night ill ever experience in LA.

i kinda know what you mean, i've always described that feeling like an impending sense of doom, like something could go ary at any moment; like there was a meteor coming down to finally wipe it off the earth. maybe a bit melodramatic, but that's how i've always felt about the place.

good story though! it's nice when people help you out or hook you up even when you're a stranger. the road always provides, as they say...

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