CelticWanderer
Well-known member
I went traveling about 2 years ago or so, thought I'd share some of the more interesting parts of the journey. (buckle in I like to write; scatter brained as it is)
It started in Shitty old Augusta GA, Hopped on a hippy bus, (actually met the guy on here) it was decided about 2 months prior in the woods around a fire that I needed to see a rainbow gathering. So I got my dads old military gear and my long board and some help from this site and just took off when the time felt right. It was my first time doing anything like it, so I was scared shitless but mostly just pumped for adventure.
A long drive in a cold bus and lots of pot and guitars and we ended up on some dirt trail in Ocala FL lost as fuck. We had to camp over night and woke up to a dirty kid hangin off the door an' banging on the walls, Our invitation to rainbow it seemed. He pointed us in the right direction, and, I dunno If you've ever gone off roading in a big ass yellow bus but it's fucking crazy. Shit's flying off the shelves, your flying off the chairs, its nuts. (oh yea, the bus had all the seats taken out in place of several stacked bunks, shelves, a table, a sink and a sofa.
Anyways, I get there and end up spending most my time on the damn bus cause I'm a bit of an antisocial twat., but there was defiantly good times to be had.
I have to say it was some of the best days of my life. There was one day the woods were on fire and no one knew why so there was a bunch of hippie kids in the woods with buckets and shovels putting out a whole damn forest fire. Everyones got soot on their face and is pissed off and shit but they did it. Turns out though it was just some controlled burns that officials didn't tell no one about. Defiantly didn't lighten moods. There was also a bombing range real close to us. Loud as fuck when they dropped and you could feel the whole ground shake. The trail going just a wee bit to close to it was all burned, looked like the forbidden forest.
There was one night where some shit went down a some dude got stabbed and it was just bad man
Eventually I met some cool people and became pretty good friends. Imma just call em' T, F, B, and K, incase they're not cool with me talkin bout this shit. So one day we all meet in the same spot on one of the ninja trails, and there's this dude in some fancy clothes and a top hap. In his hand is a leather brief case. So we're all there and we ask, "whats in the case?" and he responds with, "Well pop a squat and I'll tell ya"
So he opens it up and it's fuuuuull of little baggies of DMT. Now, I've always wanted to do hallucinogenics, but I could't get ahold of any in the shitty golf town of augusta, nothin but coke and crack there. So, K says, It's Pauls Birthday! , and it's totally not, but shit, A chance at DMT? might as well be. So I hit a couple of times burning just the very top of the crystals till it turns a nice dark brown. Shit tasted like moth balls and hurt my lungs but as soon as I exhaled, ohhhhhhhh shit. I looked at my hands it was weird man. Pretty soon, I can see the auras of everyone around me, colors just flyin off of people like energy in DBZ or some shit. Mostly though the plants and trees didn't have just one color, it was rainbows being cast into the cast. A psychedelic wonderland of fractal ribbons. Then I close my eyes, and I connected with the earth on a way that I didn't know was even possible. Every fiber of my being was pulled into the planet and connected with it. Along with some really trippy geometric closed eyed visuals. So everyone elese had smoked and we're all high as shit and we decided to go back to the bus. At some point we agreed that our shoes we're full of lies so we ran barefoot and then we realized we were crushing and killing grass and flowers and we all got really upset. We got back and listned to music and what not and I don't really remmeber the day after that. Haven't had the stuff since but I'd do it again in heartbeat.
This is us after wards. The pic kinda fits the moment and I figure it'd be safe to post as everyones face is obscured.
SO, alot more stuff happened in rainbow, drop kicks, arrests on shitty town runs, concussions and drunkenness and soon we were on our way to Savannah. We stopped at B's moms house and she was a real cool lady. Her house was this double wide trailer out in the boonies of the FL swamps. Chickens next door and lots of wide open spaces to run around in. All of these hobo kids just chillin in her house. She took us to a bar and somehow we all got in considering non of us was over 21 cept for B. Best goddamn cheeseburger I've had in my life. Anyways, after days of smoking pot out of apples and getting fucked up on vodka and whiskey Bs mom needed us to do something to pay her back, and that was paint the ceiling. If there is anything I learned out of that it's that I'm never going to be a painter. We all did really really bad, we tried but got damn we are not good at that. I remember sitting around the glass table in the yard and K and all was laughing about this why we were all homeless, kids probably right.
My memory sucks and lot more happened but soon 'nough I had to bail. I had to get to Oklahoma. So, We're all in jacksonville fl around Highway 10 and my gut tells me it's time to book it. So I say a good bye to my new friends in a parking lot and we take a photo for memories, and, if any of yall read this i miss the shit of you guys. The exit for highway ten was right there so I just got on my longboard and went for it.
Skating on the shoulder of highways is risky business. I knew full well it was illigal as fuck so there was that. but anything with a trailer would always end up in the fuckin shoulder and almost take me out. I had to jump at one point cause a carrot truck almost took me the fuck out. Anyways, it was the first night on my own. I skated about only 8 miles down the highway before hitting a gas station, buying a map and taking one of the back roads instead. Cause the highway was stupid,(sometimes you don't gatta choice though)
I see a camp ground on the map about 12 more miles away. Thinking I'm a badass and totally got this I venture forth. I end up in some redneck town and the sun has fallen and it's getting fuckin cold. (its February) I hitch a short ride with some dudes in this beat up rusty truck. They we're nice and invited me for hot dogs but I figured I needed to be on my way so they dropped me off as far as they could go. Now I only had about 4 miles left but it's about 10:00. I severly underestimated how long 4 miles would take. Skating down some road in boonies of FL in the middle of the night is scary shit. (I think I'm a coward) Along the way I saw a roadkilled wolf and that scared the ever living fuck outta me. Fucking wolf man. Eyes all pearly white from decay. Little while longer I found not one, but TWO baloney and cheese sammichs on the side of the road in a zip block bag, Still fresh, still cold. That shit carried my ass to my destination.
I get to the camp ground but what the map didnt tell me is that in order to get to the camp ground you have to walk about 3 more fuckin miles down a dirt road, which, are not friendly for longboard wheels. So i get ther at around i dunno, 12, 1 O'clock in the morning. I've got a hammock and tarp to make a little cacoon but im too lazy and too fucking tired to be bothered with setting up the tarp. It was only after settling in my bag and hammock that I realize I am not alone. I've thought the whole time I've been seeing glistening dew on the ground, reflecting off the light cast from my head lamp. I was very wrong.
Wolf spiders, a whooole fucking lot of em. I am afraid of spiders, My dad is afraid of spiders and his dad is afraid of spiders. Fuck spiders, man.
I am also lazy. So i say fuck it and if they wanna crawl all over me in my sleep, well I'll deal with that. What I didn't wanna deal with was the fucking rain and no tarp over me. I slept horribly and the next morning was bad. No food, no water, bout 10 miles to the next town. Awesome.
I go to take a piss and the porta potty there is full of shit. When I say full, I mean I don't know how people used it up to that point, like. It was over flowing with shit. I leave it and some guy comes out and tells me "yea, your better off shittin in the woods."
and from that conversation I made my way into his car and into the next town.
Lake City Florida. God damn I love this town. It is fucking beautiful, some of the best sun rises I've ever seen.
look at this shit,
Obviously it was dubbed lake city for the lake smack dab in the middle. Anywhoo
On my way into this town some dude with long hair, a muddy baseball cap and a matted beard fuckin just sprints across the street. Now people is people, but this guy sketched me out. He started talking about fiberglass and skateboards and He was talking so fast I couldn't get much out of what he was saying. After about only 10 mins of him walking beside me rambling of whatever was running in his head he literally just bolted down an adjacent street. What the hell.
So i check out a gas station trying to get some food in me and I hear a voice, "They're charging 3 dollars for a hotdog? what the hell?"
I turn around and I meet a short lady with lanky limbs a wrinkly sun beat face and short curly hair. I don't remember her name so it's Miss tour guide. We start talking and she wants to show me around town. Apparently she helps alot of travlin kids when she can. She showed me the center of the town and the soup kitchen and where I Could sleep. after a long and interesting conversation we went our separate ways. I decided to skate around and just have fun, leaving my pack well hidden in some bushes. Well, It's my first night there, and I take miss tour guides advice and sleep under the church steps. There was bushes surrounding it and it was well covererd. When I sleep outside i wake up around 5 to 6 am without fail so i figured I'd be okay. and i totally was. The following day was filled with skating around, enjoying the shared stories at the soup kitchen along with the dank ass food and the library. talking to family and friends. Night was coming and I returned to the spot under the church steps.
Now it gets strange.
An old women, caked in makeup, wearing a nuns robe, rosaries pouring down her neck, and leaning on a black old baby carriage filled with dolls. I shit you not guys. This women scared me. apparently she slept outside of the church as well. She began to tell me I was a writer( which i write poems frequently so that was odd) and that I needed to find God. She told me to stare at the support beam and imagine jesus nailed to it and covered in blood. As she spoke about her religion the air around her grow incredibly dark and her pupils grew to cover her whole iris. It was fucking horrifying.
She then said get some sleep , I'll be down the hall if you need me.
So I did't sleep the night.
The next day was full of the same stuff cept I ran into miss tourguide around 7am. I asked her about the strange women and she said i need to stay away from her. She knows everything about everyone in the town and will only trouble you.
That scared me eve more.
So the night comes, and there really isnt anywhere else to crash without the cops seeing me( which there was alot of)
and sure 'nough, here comes the old nun. This time she doesn't tell me about religion though, she tells me I"m in danger.
She starts by saying that she knows where all the police patrol and damn if she wasnt spot on. An officer driving by the church every night at 5pm and one patrolling the lake nearby at 9, along with others. She then tells me there are extremely dangerous people after her and she is in the witness protection program. She said the people after her are always watching and just by me being there my life was in danger. She may have been lying but she seemed so damn sincere. She said I need to leave by tomorrow morning.
So I did.
Off to the next towns and highways and back roads on my little skate board.
Eventually I ended up in a really bad part of some really bad town. No luck with food and no luck with cash and juding by the ply wood on the gas station windows and bars on everything else, Out there at night could be a death sentence. So I follow my gut and sur nough, heres a church, a real small one, but theres a meeting with the active members. So I wait in the parking lot and finally a large man walks from under the basment stairs and into the parking lot. So I ask him If I can sleep on the gounds here tonight, I feel like this place is dangerous.
He says he can't let me sleep here as he doesnt own the land but he'll buy me some food and a room for the night.
Hell fucking yes.
I just get some taco bell and he takes me to a little motel and buys my room for me. I thank him a whole fucking lot and he's just laughing and all cheery faced and goes out the door. So I enjoy the fuck outta that room and take a shower till the hot water is gone.
the next morning I'm on my way again down the road and I see a Van pull of to the side in front of me.
He asks, Where ya goin man? I tell Him okie and he says you wanna ride? And I'm like, fuck yea! So here we fucking go.
I skated half way across the FL panhandle and then this dude picks me up.
He says he's going to Cali and he doesnt mind taking me as far as Texas.
Fuck. Yea.
from florida to Texas mofos. He tells me stories of how he used to traffic Bibles of LSD across state lines and make ectasy and that he as a plan for a perpetual motion machine but he won't tell me. he buys me waffle house and I eat the fuck out of it and he buys us a room and I sleep amazingly.
And it was just awesommmmee. After a long long drive, he drops me off in south houston Texas and wishes me luck.
Fuck. Texas. The people there are assholes and don't give a rat fuck about you, McDonalds only has spicy McChickens and good god the storms.
So I'm trying to get the fuck out of there and booted out of every lot I try to hitch out of so I just walk north. I end up hitting this fuckin' super freeway and I cannot travel it on foot. I'm talkin Clover ramps and shit. I get angry and smoke a whole pack of ciggs Thankfully, my gut knows best and I walk back south towards a church I had seen earlier. Along the way I see a man giving out pamphlets for a half way home. I ask him where it is and donate 2 bucks. Later finding a captian Dees bag full of hushpuppies and a banana. walking along I come to gas station and my starts hurting real real bad in the direction of it. So I go stand in front of it, just trying out fate. Sure nough a dude rolls up to a gas pump and I walk up to him and ask about the half way home.
"what the hell a white boy like you doin in this town by yourself ? You know you ganna shot shot out here?"
dude ends up giving me a ride to the next town, Gracewood I think it was. he also gives me a call home and a pack of gum and a bible.
So get out say my thanks and on the way again heading North. Weeeellll, once again I hit a dead end. No where to go gatta hitch. Stuck at another fuckin' gas station. theres a guy in the middle of the road beggin for gas money. looks like Santa, but I can tell he's got a good heart. So I go up and ask him, If I can get you some more cash will you help me get to the next town?
And he's like. "well, I dunno, but okay I guess." (this dude is super fuking sweet)
Unfortunatly no money is to be found. I end up talking to this guy sitting in a Van chair by the dumpster of the Circle K. He's talking about the government and how they're ganna kill us all and I'm agreeing until this Slick ass mother fucker walks up. Now buckle in kiddos cause It's about to get really fucking bad for me.
I cant remember how the conversation went but he was throwin money at me haaaard. My gut was telling me this was a really really bad dude.
He says he's from a church and he helps homeless kids and that He can get me what I want. I tell him I need to get the fuck out of Texas and I need a greyhound into okie. He's like sure, just hop in my truck and I'll take you there. Now, Between the start of that converstaion and the end, the dude gives me nearly 60 fuckin dollars. Before we leave I give half to the Santa guy trying to get gas, He says he was ganna take me and I'm like, "Naw really sweet old dude I'm ganna ride with this fucking creep that goes against all my gut instincts." Paraphrasing but yea.
So I get in this motherfuckers truck and Immediately I regret my decision.
He starts telling me hes from a church and It's against his belief for him to tell me his name and that he helps kids like me and that he owns private jets and all this shit. I"m looking at the combat knife on my hip and he goes "No don't be scared It's alright"
Oh shit.
So next he says "So guess what, we're ganna hang out for a while." I'm freaking the fuck out at this point. The first stop we make is a liqour store and buys a huge case of beer. Shit. This mother fucker wants my butt. The next stop we make is his brothers house. He leaves me in the drive way and I don't go anywhere cause I don't want him to find me and get violent. I here shouting and he comes back into the truck and slams the door muttering about how he doesnt understand.
So we go to the first hotel. One bed. The clerk asks him to pay with a card and he says he can't do that. Great, hes trying real hard to cover his tracks. The next hotel takes cash, and again, its a one bed, room.
So were in there and he's like grab a drink and I do, cause fuck i need a beer im freakin out. I'm sitting in the chair and he's on the bed and hes like why don't you come lay down. I tell him I'm good, those hotel beds hurt my bed, Im ganna just set my bag on the floor. and he goes.
"well it's not like we're fuckin"
awesome.
So the rest the of the night he says things like your really cute ya know? And, I would totally suck your dick. Shit like that. At one point I sit on the bed to watch the TV and to keep him from getting violent. I want him to think he's getting somewhere so he doesnt kill me and rape my corpse or some shit. So I sit on the bed and he's like woooah no knives buddy. I tell him my knife stays on me, it's a rule I have and I sit back in my chair cuase I don't need him taking my knife.
This dude gets in my face and lifts his shirt. Fucking razor blade cuts every where all over his chest and stomach. he says "I've been stabbed by knifes like that before and it didn't stop me."
I tell him calmly that he was just probably stabbed in the wrong spot. (I'm fucking pissing my pants I'm so damn scared)
He sits the fuck down. At this point I'm scared shitless and I don't know what to do. I fear trying to leave will make me attack me so I sit there in my chair talking about sucking dick and how cute I am until he passes out. I stay awake the whole damn night.
So the next morning comes and I'm laying there staring at the ceiling and he wakes up.
First thing this mother fucker says is "ya know, I really wish you woulda taken that knife and slit my throat."
I laugh nervously.
So the next thing he does is turn on porn and starts jacking off under the covers, I say " ya man you do your bussiness I'm ganna go get breakfast" SO I just stay on the computer for a few hours and come back to ther room and his truck is gone and he's not there. I try and sleep but just end up taking a shower and watching shitty TV till room service calls.
So that was terrible.
WELL
Thanks to that motherfucker I had no idea where I was. So I just started north until I saw a big fucking sign for GRACEWOOD CHURCH.
One of those T.V. Evangelist type places. I find the church and ask for help and the lady tells me no one is here till Sunday. Great. Two days. So I bum around this shitty fucking horrible texas town and find a nice place in the woods to set up camp. Massive thunderstorms and driving rain all through the night. The next day though I find a fucking one hitter pipe packed full of some loud shit. I smoke merrily and write some poems and watch the sun set.
Sunday. I go to the church and Sit through the service. Sitting through a church service smelling like fresh ass and looking like a home bum is strange. Everyone gives you horrible looks like your the skum of the earth UNTIL someone gives you a dollar. Then it's like a cascade, every shitty person in there starts to think, aw fuck, If I don't give this kid money I'm ganna look like a fucking ass whole infront of all the other church goers. I end up with forty bucks from just sitting through a church service. The donation plate thing gets passed around and I dish out a ten, Blowing the minds of the well dressed folk next to me and after the service was done I went to their cafe to eat as many free donuts as I could.
Then this guy walks up. It's real old german man with a heavy german accent . wearing a very nice white suit, and hat. He had a black wooden cane topped with gold and soft eyes and a kind voice. He asks me what I need.
I tell him I got enough money and I'm just trying to make it to Oklahoma. This dude offers to buy me a grayhound ticket to oklahoma city. My destination. I cautiously accept.
Sure as shit, it turns out hes the head of the this chairity called feed the homeless children. He takes me to sonic and buys me a rootbeer float and a cheese burger and then we go to the gas station where the grey hound stopped hat. He buys me a pack of Camel Turkish Golds and a pack of gum and says I wish you luck, pass on my kindness. and just walks the fuck away.
SO I hope on that bus and the first stop is Dallas Texas.
I dunno how man of you have seen the Dallas grey hound station but fuck that place. Any ways I'm hungry as shit and so I figure I'll walk down the street to the mcdonalds I saw on the way in. I see a man out there asking for change and he stops me. He tells me a story about how his cousin fucked him over and he's got no where to stay and no money. Now, when someone is hustling for cash with a sob story it's pretty easy to tell, they tend to say way to many details they can't remember and show all the signs of lying.
This dude seemed legit. He just wants something to eat for the day. I tell him I'm going to the Mcdonalds and asks if he wants to come along. He happily obliges and walks with me. He asks how much food he can order and I pull out my thirty bucks and tell him to get whatever he needs.
This dude orders almost 20 dollars worth of mcDonalds cheese burgers mcChickens and fries.
He. Ate. All of it.
Walking backing to the grey houdn I end up passing out almost all of my ciggs to people who asked cause they saw me smoking one. And the guy asks me, "Do you think God uses some people to help others?" I say I don't know but you do reap what you sow. We talked more of gods plans but i mostly being nice. I didn't really agree with what he was saying. I prefer being kind because mankind needs more of that and it makes folks happy. Not because of my fear of hell. anyways, Theres a couple of more stops but soon 'nough I was In oklahoma City. Aww yeeaa.
Well, first things first I find the library and I met up meeting this Dude Paco. Some Mayan dude, who told a bunch of bullshit stories to fuck with you an make you laugh. I told him I used to live on Tinker airforce base near there and he starts calling me Tinkerbell. He ends up wanting to get coffee with me, so I say cause he seems like a cool dude. We get to his favorite coffee shop and god damn if they don't have some good ass coffee. Well we're talking and whips out this binder from his bag. He says, I gatta show you something.
This dude has pictures of high ranking city officials taken from his car, off the street and even a few while they were in meetings.
He wouldn't tell me why the hell he was taking these pictures but he said it was for the good of the city. Sure, dude, whatever.
So he seems my camera and he says I need a picture for my blog. I need a nice photo of the mural on the building across the street from the library. Thing about that is Theres no way to get a decent shot without being inside the libaray on one of the upper floors in one of the offices, where the general public and apparently Paco, was not allowed. He says he'll give me 20 dollars for the shot. So. I agree, cause why the fuck not.
I go the library and tell this dude I'm doing a project for school on architecture in the city, and I need a good shot of that mural. So, without too many questions he leads me upstairs to an empty office and tells me I have 10 minutes. So I just take a few shots of it and I'm on my way. I meet Paco later at the cafe', he pulls off the pics from my camera and hands me 20 bucks. Easy money.
I ask him then, if he could do me a solid. I've been trying to reach my good friend Alex, the whole reason Okie was my destination, and I had no luck with pay phones. I knew he lived in Bethany so I asked for a ride there. He agrees and takes me there.
Shit. This town has nothing. I remember thinking as I rode up into the heart of it.
I use Pacos phone and end up finally meeting Alex in person. We both give Paco a hug and hang out for the day.
Unfortunaly I can not stay with Alex and there is no where to sleep around here.
SO.
I skate my happy ass back to OKC looking for the homeless shelter there. I end up horribly horribly horribly lost. It's like fuckin' three in the morning and there is no city in site. So I stop at a gas station, desperate for help and directions. My body is failing from the rough skate and I'm too tired to go anymore. She's a small asain lady working the counter and two kids are helping her. She says "I'd help you but I don't know you and I have my kids with me." which, I totally get. She then tells me she knows someone. Carla. So she calls her and soon enough an old red station wagon rolls up.
It's Carla, shes a middle aged Latino woman, she tells me to get in and that she's ganna help me out. Superduper.
So we go to Carlas house. She lives in this apartment complex, with her Daughter and Son. I don't remmeber their names but they were young. She also had an older daughter and I don't remember her name either. (I'll never forget a face but I'm real bad with names)
So Carla lets me stay there for /weeks/ This is the kindest family I've ever ever met. We drink and eat and smoke and I run errands for them and help around the house. So some of the things that happened there. I wrote this song, >
On a purple hannah montana guitar. Then there was the night where we had to break into their house because they locked them selves out.
Then one night she had family come over. A real big dude, easily 300 pounds, and a little like, i dunno 13 year old girl. I'm jammin in the little room they let me use on my little purple guitar. And I hear "dreeaaamy" out in the hall way.
Alright. Weird. Whatever.
Then the dude fuckin KICKS the door open and starts screaming at me "ARE YOU FUCKIN WITH MY LITTLE COUSIN?! I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU"
I tell him no way man, I"m just chillin in here playing guitar, I got no interest in her, I swear to god.
So he left me alone and went to talk to her. Well then I hear screaming and shit,
Apparently, She was putting on make up and shit in the bathroom trying to get all pretty and so when he told her she can not do this, she freak out saying she hates him and shit and ran out side screaming and crying. So dude pulls out a fucking GUN and tells her to get the fuck back inside.
The rest of the night was awkward as fuck. He later apologized to me saying he was just looking out for her. Totally cool. Keep the gun in your pants.
Now the best part of this crazy shit.
I'm at a family BBQ thing with them Carlas friends. Well, Her friend needs someone to watch her kids. And Carla volunteers me. Saying "Oh hes really good with my kids he helps em' with home work and feeds em' an everytthing." Keep in mind her kids are like, 8 and 11.
Her friends kids dare fuckin like 3 and 2. I cannot handle. I try and back outta that shit, but nope. It was happening.
So the night comes, I got Rose, the 3 year old, Pearl the 2 year old Carlas 8 and 11 year olds. I am Not good with children. I hate children.
ALSO They told me pearl was potty trained and I'll have no Issues because I can't change a diaper.
So these people trusted this homeless dude they picked up from a gas station with their toddlers. I was the wrong man for the job.
They end up staying up till like fuckin 11 at night cause, what fuck man I don't know your bed time.
Carals 11 year old asks to go to her friends house down the street. I'm like, "Nooo not while I'm watching you" cause this neighborhood was really rough and just bad. and she goes, Well my mom lets me all the time. And I go "well alright i guess." cause I'm fucking stupid and I don't know how to handle children. So I watch her go until the dark of the night consumes her and I can no longer see.
WELL
Come next morning, SHES STILL NOT FUCKING THERE.
and PEARL SHIT HERSELF.
Fuuck me.
So I got no idea what to do cause She didn't say she was spenin the night, so like, I'm thinking this kid is dead. And I can't change pearl cause fuck man,. diapers, I dunno how to do that, nor do I want to touch this kids shit.
SO it's like 9am. I start to take the little ones down to their moms place to drop them off. Mind you, dropping them off with pearls diaper just full of shit and they're all sleep deprived. Well on the way there, my nose starts bleeding, and the first drop and I can never catch.
Bam. Right on pearls little head. Blood. On. Her. Head. My blood. Can't wipe it off cause I'm walking two little toddlers across the street and I'll be damned if they get hit by cars.
So I drop em off, pearl covered in shit and blood, and rose tired as all hell. I was supposed to get 15 bucks later that night. Needless to say I did not get it from her.
Anyway. I get back to the apartment and 11am rolls around. Carals 11 year old is still not fucking home. Omg. I killed this moms kid holy shit my life is over I'm going to hell I runied her life oh fuck god damn it fuck. I've never freaked out harder in my fucking life.
Well. Carla comes home. First thing she asks? "Wheres my 11 year old?" and I'm just like, ohhh fuck, "I.. I don't... she went to her friends.. and uh."
THEN BY THE GRACE OF GOD THE PHONE RINGS
Guess who? the 11 year olds friends parents.
"Yea shes over here, we took her to the roller rink for an all nighter." Thank fucking jesus.
Well.
Next day I get kicked out. Totally get why. I suck at baby sitting, I'd kick me out to.
Well while all those crazy things were happning I was skating to Bethany and back to see Alex. It was only a few miles.
thankf (I;m sorry i hit a key stroke with my toe and now the text is small I can't change it back.)
Thankfully. I had found a place to set up camp by the Dam out there. Out in the woods. The mornings sucked because it was cold and wet but i was closer to Alex so that made everything alright. (did'nt know it then but I was kinda in love with him)
Well, the weather started to get real real bad. Like, 20 degreess at night, freezing winds druning the day. It sucked. And there was almost no way for me to get food or money in this town.
Once again luck strikes (what the hell text?)
Well, I end up running tino a friend I havent seen since i was maybe 12 years old. and she remember me.
She says that I can stay with her at her moms house.
Luckly they all remmeber me and still like me so I'm chillin there.
I was ganna see some more old friends that lived in okie but then her mom offered to buy me a greyhound ticket back home.
So, I took that offer, and back to GA I went.
Where I was greeting with my dad selling the house, living in the woods more, eating berries and cactus and then moving in with my girlfriend that I got when I came back to GA.
That was all when I was 18. I'm 22 now, and I'm about to go at it again. Ganna hike the AT and hopefully skate across america.
So that's roughly the story of my first adventure, lots of luck and trusting my guy kept me alive. If you read that fucking book of text, thank you,
and I apologize for the typos, I'm not proofreading because I'm very drunk and now that this is done I'm going the fuck to sleep.
Have a rad night everyone.
It started in Shitty old Augusta GA, Hopped on a hippy bus, (actually met the guy on here) it was decided about 2 months prior in the woods around a fire that I needed to see a rainbow gathering. So I got my dads old military gear and my long board and some help from this site and just took off when the time felt right. It was my first time doing anything like it, so I was scared shitless but mostly just pumped for adventure.
A long drive in a cold bus and lots of pot and guitars and we ended up on some dirt trail in Ocala FL lost as fuck. We had to camp over night and woke up to a dirty kid hangin off the door an' banging on the walls, Our invitation to rainbow it seemed. He pointed us in the right direction, and, I dunno If you've ever gone off roading in a big ass yellow bus but it's fucking crazy. Shit's flying off the shelves, your flying off the chairs, its nuts. (oh yea, the bus had all the seats taken out in place of several stacked bunks, shelves, a table, a sink and a sofa.
Anyways, I get there and end up spending most my time on the damn bus cause I'm a bit of an antisocial twat., but there was defiantly good times to be had.
I have to say it was some of the best days of my life. There was one day the woods were on fire and no one knew why so there was a bunch of hippie kids in the woods with buckets and shovels putting out a whole damn forest fire. Everyones got soot on their face and is pissed off and shit but they did it. Turns out though it was just some controlled burns that officials didn't tell no one about. Defiantly didn't lighten moods. There was also a bombing range real close to us. Loud as fuck when they dropped and you could feel the whole ground shake. The trail going just a wee bit to close to it was all burned, looked like the forbidden forest.
There was one night where some shit went down a some dude got stabbed and it was just bad man
Eventually I met some cool people and became pretty good friends. Imma just call em' T, F, B, and K, incase they're not cool with me talkin bout this shit. So one day we all meet in the same spot on one of the ninja trails, and there's this dude in some fancy clothes and a top hap. In his hand is a leather brief case. So we're all there and we ask, "whats in the case?" and he responds with, "Well pop a squat and I'll tell ya"
So he opens it up and it's fuuuuull of little baggies of DMT. Now, I've always wanted to do hallucinogenics, but I could't get ahold of any in the shitty golf town of augusta, nothin but coke and crack there. So, K says, It's Pauls Birthday! , and it's totally not, but shit, A chance at DMT? might as well be. So I hit a couple of times burning just the very top of the crystals till it turns a nice dark brown. Shit tasted like moth balls and hurt my lungs but as soon as I exhaled, ohhhhhhhh shit. I looked at my hands it was weird man. Pretty soon, I can see the auras of everyone around me, colors just flyin off of people like energy in DBZ or some shit. Mostly though the plants and trees didn't have just one color, it was rainbows being cast into the cast. A psychedelic wonderland of fractal ribbons. Then I close my eyes, and I connected with the earth on a way that I didn't know was even possible. Every fiber of my being was pulled into the planet and connected with it. Along with some really trippy geometric closed eyed visuals. So everyone elese had smoked and we're all high as shit and we decided to go back to the bus. At some point we agreed that our shoes we're full of lies so we ran barefoot and then we realized we were crushing and killing grass and flowers and we all got really upset. We got back and listned to music and what not and I don't really remmeber the day after that. Haven't had the stuff since but I'd do it again in heartbeat.
This is us after wards. The pic kinda fits the moment and I figure it'd be safe to post as everyones face is obscured.
SO, alot more stuff happened in rainbow, drop kicks, arrests on shitty town runs, concussions and drunkenness and soon we were on our way to Savannah. We stopped at B's moms house and she was a real cool lady. Her house was this double wide trailer out in the boonies of the FL swamps. Chickens next door and lots of wide open spaces to run around in. All of these hobo kids just chillin in her house. She took us to a bar and somehow we all got in considering non of us was over 21 cept for B. Best goddamn cheeseburger I've had in my life. Anyways, after days of smoking pot out of apples and getting fucked up on vodka and whiskey Bs mom needed us to do something to pay her back, and that was paint the ceiling. If there is anything I learned out of that it's that I'm never going to be a painter. We all did really really bad, we tried but got damn we are not good at that. I remember sitting around the glass table in the yard and K and all was laughing about this why we were all homeless, kids probably right.
My memory sucks and lot more happened but soon 'nough I had to bail. I had to get to Oklahoma. So, We're all in jacksonville fl around Highway 10 and my gut tells me it's time to book it. So I say a good bye to my new friends in a parking lot and we take a photo for memories, and, if any of yall read this i miss the shit of you guys. The exit for highway ten was right there so I just got on my longboard and went for it.
Skating on the shoulder of highways is risky business. I knew full well it was illigal as fuck so there was that. but anything with a trailer would always end up in the fuckin shoulder and almost take me out. I had to jump at one point cause a carrot truck almost took me the fuck out. Anyways, it was the first night on my own. I skated about only 8 miles down the highway before hitting a gas station, buying a map and taking one of the back roads instead. Cause the highway was stupid,(sometimes you don't gatta choice though)
I see a camp ground on the map about 12 more miles away. Thinking I'm a badass and totally got this I venture forth. I end up in some redneck town and the sun has fallen and it's getting fuckin cold. (its February) I hitch a short ride with some dudes in this beat up rusty truck. They we're nice and invited me for hot dogs but I figured I needed to be on my way so they dropped me off as far as they could go. Now I only had about 4 miles left but it's about 10:00. I severly underestimated how long 4 miles would take. Skating down some road in boonies of FL in the middle of the night is scary shit. (I think I'm a coward) Along the way I saw a roadkilled wolf and that scared the ever living fuck outta me. Fucking wolf man. Eyes all pearly white from decay. Little while longer I found not one, but TWO baloney and cheese sammichs on the side of the road in a zip block bag, Still fresh, still cold. That shit carried my ass to my destination.
I get to the camp ground but what the map didnt tell me is that in order to get to the camp ground you have to walk about 3 more fuckin miles down a dirt road, which, are not friendly for longboard wheels. So i get ther at around i dunno, 12, 1 O'clock in the morning. I've got a hammock and tarp to make a little cacoon but im too lazy and too fucking tired to be bothered with setting up the tarp. It was only after settling in my bag and hammock that I realize I am not alone. I've thought the whole time I've been seeing glistening dew on the ground, reflecting off the light cast from my head lamp. I was very wrong.
Wolf spiders, a whooole fucking lot of em. I am afraid of spiders, My dad is afraid of spiders and his dad is afraid of spiders. Fuck spiders, man.
I am also lazy. So i say fuck it and if they wanna crawl all over me in my sleep, well I'll deal with that. What I didn't wanna deal with was the fucking rain and no tarp over me. I slept horribly and the next morning was bad. No food, no water, bout 10 miles to the next town. Awesome.
I go to take a piss and the porta potty there is full of shit. When I say full, I mean I don't know how people used it up to that point, like. It was over flowing with shit. I leave it and some guy comes out and tells me "yea, your better off shittin in the woods."
and from that conversation I made my way into his car and into the next town.
Lake City Florida. God damn I love this town. It is fucking beautiful, some of the best sun rises I've ever seen.
look at this shit,
Obviously it was dubbed lake city for the lake smack dab in the middle. Anywhoo
On my way into this town some dude with long hair, a muddy baseball cap and a matted beard fuckin just sprints across the street. Now people is people, but this guy sketched me out. He started talking about fiberglass and skateboards and He was talking so fast I couldn't get much out of what he was saying. After about only 10 mins of him walking beside me rambling of whatever was running in his head he literally just bolted down an adjacent street. What the hell.
So i check out a gas station trying to get some food in me and I hear a voice, "They're charging 3 dollars for a hotdog? what the hell?"
I turn around and I meet a short lady with lanky limbs a wrinkly sun beat face and short curly hair. I don't remember her name so it's Miss tour guide. We start talking and she wants to show me around town. Apparently she helps alot of travlin kids when she can. She showed me the center of the town and the soup kitchen and where I Could sleep. after a long and interesting conversation we went our separate ways. I decided to skate around and just have fun, leaving my pack well hidden in some bushes. Well, It's my first night there, and I take miss tour guides advice and sleep under the church steps. There was bushes surrounding it and it was well covererd. When I sleep outside i wake up around 5 to 6 am without fail so i figured I'd be okay. and i totally was. The following day was filled with skating around, enjoying the shared stories at the soup kitchen along with the dank ass food and the library. talking to family and friends. Night was coming and I returned to the spot under the church steps.
Now it gets strange.
An old women, caked in makeup, wearing a nuns robe, rosaries pouring down her neck, and leaning on a black old baby carriage filled with dolls. I shit you not guys. This women scared me. apparently she slept outside of the church as well. She began to tell me I was a writer( which i write poems frequently so that was odd) and that I needed to find God. She told me to stare at the support beam and imagine jesus nailed to it and covered in blood. As she spoke about her religion the air around her grow incredibly dark and her pupils grew to cover her whole iris. It was fucking horrifying.
She then said get some sleep , I'll be down the hall if you need me.
So I did't sleep the night.
The next day was full of the same stuff cept I ran into miss tourguide around 7am. I asked her about the strange women and she said i need to stay away from her. She knows everything about everyone in the town and will only trouble you.
That scared me eve more.
So the night comes, and there really isnt anywhere else to crash without the cops seeing me( which there was alot of)
and sure 'nough, here comes the old nun. This time she doesn't tell me about religion though, she tells me I"m in danger.
She starts by saying that she knows where all the police patrol and damn if she wasnt spot on. An officer driving by the church every night at 5pm and one patrolling the lake nearby at 9, along with others. She then tells me there are extremely dangerous people after her and she is in the witness protection program. She said the people after her are always watching and just by me being there my life was in danger. She may have been lying but she seemed so damn sincere. She said I need to leave by tomorrow morning.
So I did.
Off to the next towns and highways and back roads on my little skate board.
Eventually I ended up in a really bad part of some really bad town. No luck with food and no luck with cash and juding by the ply wood on the gas station windows and bars on everything else, Out there at night could be a death sentence. So I follow my gut and sur nough, heres a church, a real small one, but theres a meeting with the active members. So I wait in the parking lot and finally a large man walks from under the basment stairs and into the parking lot. So I ask him If I can sleep on the gounds here tonight, I feel like this place is dangerous.
He says he can't let me sleep here as he doesnt own the land but he'll buy me some food and a room for the night.
Hell fucking yes.
I just get some taco bell and he takes me to a little motel and buys my room for me. I thank him a whole fucking lot and he's just laughing and all cheery faced and goes out the door. So I enjoy the fuck outta that room and take a shower till the hot water is gone.
the next morning I'm on my way again down the road and I see a Van pull of to the side in front of me.
He asks, Where ya goin man? I tell Him okie and he says you wanna ride? And I'm like, fuck yea! So here we fucking go.
I skated half way across the FL panhandle and then this dude picks me up.
He says he's going to Cali and he doesnt mind taking me as far as Texas.
Fuck. Yea.
from florida to Texas mofos. He tells me stories of how he used to traffic Bibles of LSD across state lines and make ectasy and that he as a plan for a perpetual motion machine but he won't tell me. he buys me waffle house and I eat the fuck out of it and he buys us a room and I sleep amazingly.
And it was just awesommmmee. After a long long drive, he drops me off in south houston Texas and wishes me luck.
Fuck. Texas. The people there are assholes and don't give a rat fuck about you, McDonalds only has spicy McChickens and good god the storms.
So I'm trying to get the fuck out of there and booted out of every lot I try to hitch out of so I just walk north. I end up hitting this fuckin' super freeway and I cannot travel it on foot. I'm talkin Clover ramps and shit. I get angry and smoke a whole pack of ciggs Thankfully, my gut knows best and I walk back south towards a church I had seen earlier. Along the way I see a man giving out pamphlets for a half way home. I ask him where it is and donate 2 bucks. Later finding a captian Dees bag full of hushpuppies and a banana. walking along I come to gas station and my starts hurting real real bad in the direction of it. So I go stand in front of it, just trying out fate. Sure nough a dude rolls up to a gas pump and I walk up to him and ask about the half way home.
"what the hell a white boy like you doin in this town by yourself ? You know you ganna shot shot out here?"
dude ends up giving me a ride to the next town, Gracewood I think it was. he also gives me a call home and a pack of gum and a bible.
So get out say my thanks and on the way again heading North. Weeeellll, once again I hit a dead end. No where to go gatta hitch. Stuck at another fuckin' gas station. theres a guy in the middle of the road beggin for gas money. looks like Santa, but I can tell he's got a good heart. So I go up and ask him, If I can get you some more cash will you help me get to the next town?
And he's like. "well, I dunno, but okay I guess." (this dude is super fuking sweet)
Unfortunatly no money is to be found. I end up talking to this guy sitting in a Van chair by the dumpster of the Circle K. He's talking about the government and how they're ganna kill us all and I'm agreeing until this Slick ass mother fucker walks up. Now buckle in kiddos cause It's about to get really fucking bad for me.
I cant remember how the conversation went but he was throwin money at me haaaard. My gut was telling me this was a really really bad dude.
He says he's from a church and he helps homeless kids and that He can get me what I want. I tell him I need to get the fuck out of Texas and I need a greyhound into okie. He's like sure, just hop in my truck and I'll take you there. Now, Between the start of that converstaion and the end, the dude gives me nearly 60 fuckin dollars. Before we leave I give half to the Santa guy trying to get gas, He says he was ganna take me and I'm like, "Naw really sweet old dude I'm ganna ride with this fucking creep that goes against all my gut instincts." Paraphrasing but yea.
So I get in this motherfuckers truck and Immediately I regret my decision.
He starts telling me hes from a church and It's against his belief for him to tell me his name and that he helps kids like me and that he owns private jets and all this shit. I"m looking at the combat knife on my hip and he goes "No don't be scared It's alright"
Oh shit.
So next he says "So guess what, we're ganna hang out for a while." I'm freaking the fuck out at this point. The first stop we make is a liqour store and buys a huge case of beer. Shit. This mother fucker wants my butt. The next stop we make is his brothers house. He leaves me in the drive way and I don't go anywhere cause I don't want him to find me and get violent. I here shouting and he comes back into the truck and slams the door muttering about how he doesnt understand.
So we go to the first hotel. One bed. The clerk asks him to pay with a card and he says he can't do that. Great, hes trying real hard to cover his tracks. The next hotel takes cash, and again, its a one bed, room.
So were in there and he's like grab a drink and I do, cause fuck i need a beer im freakin out. I'm sitting in the chair and he's on the bed and hes like why don't you come lay down. I tell him I'm good, those hotel beds hurt my bed, Im ganna just set my bag on the floor. and he goes.
"well it's not like we're fuckin"
awesome.
So the rest the of the night he says things like your really cute ya know? And, I would totally suck your dick. Shit like that. At one point I sit on the bed to watch the TV and to keep him from getting violent. I want him to think he's getting somewhere so he doesnt kill me and rape my corpse or some shit. So I sit on the bed and he's like woooah no knives buddy. I tell him my knife stays on me, it's a rule I have and I sit back in my chair cuase I don't need him taking my knife.
This dude gets in my face and lifts his shirt. Fucking razor blade cuts every where all over his chest and stomach. he says "I've been stabbed by knifes like that before and it didn't stop me."
I tell him calmly that he was just probably stabbed in the wrong spot. (I'm fucking pissing my pants I'm so damn scared)
He sits the fuck down. At this point I'm scared shitless and I don't know what to do. I fear trying to leave will make me attack me so I sit there in my chair talking about sucking dick and how cute I am until he passes out. I stay awake the whole damn night.
So the next morning comes and I'm laying there staring at the ceiling and he wakes up.
First thing this mother fucker says is "ya know, I really wish you woulda taken that knife and slit my throat."
I laugh nervously.
So the next thing he does is turn on porn and starts jacking off under the covers, I say " ya man you do your bussiness I'm ganna go get breakfast" SO I just stay on the computer for a few hours and come back to ther room and his truck is gone and he's not there. I try and sleep but just end up taking a shower and watching shitty TV till room service calls.
So that was terrible.
WELL
Thanks to that motherfucker I had no idea where I was. So I just started north until I saw a big fucking sign for GRACEWOOD CHURCH.
One of those T.V. Evangelist type places. I find the church and ask for help and the lady tells me no one is here till Sunday. Great. Two days. So I bum around this shitty fucking horrible texas town and find a nice place in the woods to set up camp. Massive thunderstorms and driving rain all through the night. The next day though I find a fucking one hitter pipe packed full of some loud shit. I smoke merrily and write some poems and watch the sun set.
Sunday. I go to the church and Sit through the service. Sitting through a church service smelling like fresh ass and looking like a home bum is strange. Everyone gives you horrible looks like your the skum of the earth UNTIL someone gives you a dollar. Then it's like a cascade, every shitty person in there starts to think, aw fuck, If I don't give this kid money I'm ganna look like a fucking ass whole infront of all the other church goers. I end up with forty bucks from just sitting through a church service. The donation plate thing gets passed around and I dish out a ten, Blowing the minds of the well dressed folk next to me and after the service was done I went to their cafe to eat as many free donuts as I could.
Then this guy walks up. It's real old german man with a heavy german accent . wearing a very nice white suit, and hat. He had a black wooden cane topped with gold and soft eyes and a kind voice. He asks me what I need.
I tell him I got enough money and I'm just trying to make it to Oklahoma. This dude offers to buy me a grayhound ticket to oklahoma city. My destination. I cautiously accept.
Sure as shit, it turns out hes the head of the this chairity called feed the homeless children. He takes me to sonic and buys me a rootbeer float and a cheese burger and then we go to the gas station where the grey hound stopped hat. He buys me a pack of Camel Turkish Golds and a pack of gum and says I wish you luck, pass on my kindness. and just walks the fuck away.
SO I hope on that bus and the first stop is Dallas Texas.
I dunno how man of you have seen the Dallas grey hound station but fuck that place. Any ways I'm hungry as shit and so I figure I'll walk down the street to the mcdonalds I saw on the way in. I see a man out there asking for change and he stops me. He tells me a story about how his cousin fucked him over and he's got no where to stay and no money. Now, when someone is hustling for cash with a sob story it's pretty easy to tell, they tend to say way to many details they can't remember and show all the signs of lying.
This dude seemed legit. He just wants something to eat for the day. I tell him I'm going to the Mcdonalds and asks if he wants to come along. He happily obliges and walks with me. He asks how much food he can order and I pull out my thirty bucks and tell him to get whatever he needs.
This dude orders almost 20 dollars worth of mcDonalds cheese burgers mcChickens and fries.
He. Ate. All of it.
Walking backing to the grey houdn I end up passing out almost all of my ciggs to people who asked cause they saw me smoking one. And the guy asks me, "Do you think God uses some people to help others?" I say I don't know but you do reap what you sow. We talked more of gods plans but i mostly being nice. I didn't really agree with what he was saying. I prefer being kind because mankind needs more of that and it makes folks happy. Not because of my fear of hell. anyways, Theres a couple of more stops but soon 'nough I was In oklahoma City. Aww yeeaa.
Well, first things first I find the library and I met up meeting this Dude Paco. Some Mayan dude, who told a bunch of bullshit stories to fuck with you an make you laugh. I told him I used to live on Tinker airforce base near there and he starts calling me Tinkerbell. He ends up wanting to get coffee with me, so I say cause he seems like a cool dude. We get to his favorite coffee shop and god damn if they don't have some good ass coffee. Well we're talking and whips out this binder from his bag. He says, I gatta show you something.
This dude has pictures of high ranking city officials taken from his car, off the street and even a few while they were in meetings.
He wouldn't tell me why the hell he was taking these pictures but he said it was for the good of the city. Sure, dude, whatever.
So he seems my camera and he says I need a picture for my blog. I need a nice photo of the mural on the building across the street from the library. Thing about that is Theres no way to get a decent shot without being inside the libaray on one of the upper floors in one of the offices, where the general public and apparently Paco, was not allowed. He says he'll give me 20 dollars for the shot. So. I agree, cause why the fuck not.
I go the library and tell this dude I'm doing a project for school on architecture in the city, and I need a good shot of that mural. So, without too many questions he leads me upstairs to an empty office and tells me I have 10 minutes. So I just take a few shots of it and I'm on my way. I meet Paco later at the cafe', he pulls off the pics from my camera and hands me 20 bucks. Easy money.
I ask him then, if he could do me a solid. I've been trying to reach my good friend Alex, the whole reason Okie was my destination, and I had no luck with pay phones. I knew he lived in Bethany so I asked for a ride there. He agrees and takes me there.
Shit. This town has nothing. I remember thinking as I rode up into the heart of it.
I use Pacos phone and end up finally meeting Alex in person. We both give Paco a hug and hang out for the day.
Unfortunaly I can not stay with Alex and there is no where to sleep around here.
SO.
I skate my happy ass back to OKC looking for the homeless shelter there. I end up horribly horribly horribly lost. It's like fuckin' three in the morning and there is no city in site. So I stop at a gas station, desperate for help and directions. My body is failing from the rough skate and I'm too tired to go anymore. She's a small asain lady working the counter and two kids are helping her. She says "I'd help you but I don't know you and I have my kids with me." which, I totally get. She then tells me she knows someone. Carla. So she calls her and soon enough an old red station wagon rolls up.
It's Carla, shes a middle aged Latino woman, she tells me to get in and that she's ganna help me out. Superduper.
So we go to Carlas house. She lives in this apartment complex, with her Daughter and Son. I don't remmeber their names but they were young. She also had an older daughter and I don't remember her name either. (I'll never forget a face but I'm real bad with names)
So Carla lets me stay there for /weeks/ This is the kindest family I've ever ever met. We drink and eat and smoke and I run errands for them and help around the house. So some of the things that happened there. I wrote this song, >
On a purple hannah montana guitar. Then there was the night where we had to break into their house because they locked them selves out.
Then one night she had family come over. A real big dude, easily 300 pounds, and a little like, i dunno 13 year old girl. I'm jammin in the little room they let me use on my little purple guitar. And I hear "dreeaaamy" out in the hall way.
Alright. Weird. Whatever.
Then the dude fuckin KICKS the door open and starts screaming at me "ARE YOU FUCKIN WITH MY LITTLE COUSIN?! I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU"
I tell him no way man, I"m just chillin in here playing guitar, I got no interest in her, I swear to god.
So he left me alone and went to talk to her. Well then I hear screaming and shit,
Apparently, She was putting on make up and shit in the bathroom trying to get all pretty and so when he told her she can not do this, she freak out saying she hates him and shit and ran out side screaming and crying. So dude pulls out a fucking GUN and tells her to get the fuck back inside.
The rest of the night was awkward as fuck. He later apologized to me saying he was just looking out for her. Totally cool. Keep the gun in your pants.
Now the best part of this crazy shit.
I'm at a family BBQ thing with them Carlas friends. Well, Her friend needs someone to watch her kids. And Carla volunteers me. Saying "Oh hes really good with my kids he helps em' with home work and feeds em' an everytthing." Keep in mind her kids are like, 8 and 11.
Her friends kids dare fuckin like 3 and 2. I cannot handle. I try and back outta that shit, but nope. It was happening.
So the night comes, I got Rose, the 3 year old, Pearl the 2 year old Carlas 8 and 11 year olds. I am Not good with children. I hate children.
ALSO They told me pearl was potty trained and I'll have no Issues because I can't change a diaper.
So these people trusted this homeless dude they picked up from a gas station with their toddlers. I was the wrong man for the job.
They end up staying up till like fuckin 11 at night cause, what fuck man I don't know your bed time.
Carals 11 year old asks to go to her friends house down the street. I'm like, "Nooo not while I'm watching you" cause this neighborhood was really rough and just bad. and she goes, Well my mom lets me all the time. And I go "well alright i guess." cause I'm fucking stupid and I don't know how to handle children. So I watch her go until the dark of the night consumes her and I can no longer see.
WELL
Come next morning, SHES STILL NOT FUCKING THERE.
and PEARL SHIT HERSELF.
Fuuck me.
So I got no idea what to do cause She didn't say she was spenin the night, so like, I'm thinking this kid is dead. And I can't change pearl cause fuck man,. diapers, I dunno how to do that, nor do I want to touch this kids shit.
SO it's like 9am. I start to take the little ones down to their moms place to drop them off. Mind you, dropping them off with pearls diaper just full of shit and they're all sleep deprived. Well on the way there, my nose starts bleeding, and the first drop and I can never catch.
Bam. Right on pearls little head. Blood. On. Her. Head. My blood. Can't wipe it off cause I'm walking two little toddlers across the street and I'll be damned if they get hit by cars.
So I drop em off, pearl covered in shit and blood, and rose tired as all hell. I was supposed to get 15 bucks later that night. Needless to say I did not get it from her.
Anyway. I get back to the apartment and 11am rolls around. Carals 11 year old is still not fucking home. Omg. I killed this moms kid holy shit my life is over I'm going to hell I runied her life oh fuck god damn it fuck. I've never freaked out harder in my fucking life.
Well. Carla comes home. First thing she asks? "Wheres my 11 year old?" and I'm just like, ohhh fuck, "I.. I don't... she went to her friends.. and uh."
THEN BY THE GRACE OF GOD THE PHONE RINGS
Guess who? the 11 year olds friends parents.
"Yea shes over here, we took her to the roller rink for an all nighter." Thank fucking jesus.
Well.
Next day I get kicked out. Totally get why. I suck at baby sitting, I'd kick me out to.
Well while all those crazy things were happning I was skating to Bethany and back to see Alex. It was only a few miles.
thankf (I;m sorry i hit a key stroke with my toe and now the text is small I can't change it back.)
Thankfully. I had found a place to set up camp by the Dam out there. Out in the woods. The mornings sucked because it was cold and wet but i was closer to Alex so that made everything alright. (did'nt know it then but I was kinda in love with him)
Well, the weather started to get real real bad. Like, 20 degreess at night, freezing winds druning the day. It sucked. And there was almost no way for me to get food or money in this town.
Once again luck strikes (what the hell text?)
Well, I end up running tino a friend I havent seen since i was maybe 12 years old. and she remember me.
She says that I can stay with her at her moms house.
Luckly they all remmeber me and still like me so I'm chillin there.
I was ganna see some more old friends that lived in okie but then her mom offered to buy me a greyhound ticket back home.
So, I took that offer, and back to GA I went.
Where I was greeting with my dad selling the house, living in the woods more, eating berries and cactus and then moving in with my girlfriend that I got when I came back to GA.
That was all when I was 18. I'm 22 now, and I'm about to go at it again. Ganna hike the AT and hopefully skate across america.
So that's roughly the story of my first adventure, lots of luck and trusting my guy kept me alive. If you read that fucking book of text, thank you,
and I apologize for the typos, I'm not proofreading because I'm very drunk and now that this is done I'm going the fuck to sleep.
Have a rad night everyone.