Make a sign and of your destination, and stand at an on ramp. Try to make small talk. Don't take sketchy rides. You looked fucking big from your avatar (and hairy!
), it might decrease your chances slightly, but also stop the creepers a bit too.
Hitching aint so hard to figure out. Make sure you're going the right way. Try to use major cities as destinations, and look at a map now and then. Where are you going? I will plan you a route in 5 min. with google maps if it helps. Big cities, Highways, high traffic.