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- Oct 20, 2018
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A Little Mini-Adventure from the days of Cruising Main Street in Downtown Hopkins, MN
It was late at night, around midnight, and Hopkins town was thinning out. I had a car load of girls ranging in age from 14 to 17 years old. I was over 18. It was a hot night and we had all the windows rolled down. A couple of the girls were out past curfew but since I was an adult, I figured it was okay. All the girls were talking on my CB Radio, trying to find guys to talk to. It didn't take long before they were talking to this one guy I knew who went by the name of "Banana Dick." Of course this lead to a perverted conversation over the CB Radio. As with all perverted conversations, it didn't take long before he said something to offend one of the girls and she said, "Fuck you!" He responded with, "I can't hear you...." and she repeated it again. He still said he couldn't hear her, and then both her and the girl next to her, said it in unison. He continued to egg them on and pretty soon all five girls in my car were screaming into the CB mic, "FUCK YOU!" in unison, and it was loud.
Banana Dick kept badgering them and badgering them, and they screamed it louder and louder. All of a sudden a Hopkins Cop pulled in behind me, and before I could say anything to the girls they shouted their little expletive. It was so loud that it echoed off the buildings on both sides of the street!
I looked into my rear view mirror only to see the red lights come on, and I pulled over. The cop walked up to my car and asked for my license, then shined his flashlight into my back seat and asked, "Is everyone over 18 in here?" The first girl to speak up and say she was, was the 14 year old, who had a bench warrant out for her arrest for beating up her dad (she was a "Biker Chick")! She said with a smile, "Yes sir, I am over 18 and so are my friends." The cop then asked for ID and she responded, "I don't have it with me." The cop then said that it was against city ordinance to yell profane words, and that I was going to get a ticket!
A few minutes later the cop came back with a citation written out to ME, for saying Fuck You, and he wrote "Fuck You," right on the ticket along with the city ordinance number! It went on MY criminal record and I didn't even say those words! I never said anything over my CB, and was quiet the whole time they were yelling at Banana Dick. The cop informed me that because I was the driver; I was responsible for what went on in my car.
I paid the fine and kept the ticket to show off to all my friends and stuff. Everyone thought it was really cool that "Mr. Goody-Two-Shoes" (my reputation back then) got a ticket for swearing in public, since none of them had ever even heard me swear before; the girls all thought it was funny too. About six months later, someone stole my ticket! That really pissed me off. If I still had it, I would frame it as a tribute to how stupid some of our laws are.
Three of the Five Girls in my car that night and their CB Handles:
-----TWINKIE_________________BAMBI______________HORNEY BANDIT-----
Not Pictured: Misty-Blue, and Dimples--the 14-year-old.
And of course, the one called....
BANANA DICK
It was late at night, around midnight, and Hopkins town was thinning out. I had a car load of girls ranging in age from 14 to 17 years old. I was over 18. It was a hot night and we had all the windows rolled down. A couple of the girls were out past curfew but since I was an adult, I figured it was okay. All the girls were talking on my CB Radio, trying to find guys to talk to. It didn't take long before they were talking to this one guy I knew who went by the name of "Banana Dick." Of course this lead to a perverted conversation over the CB Radio. As with all perverted conversations, it didn't take long before he said something to offend one of the girls and she said, "Fuck you!" He responded with, "I can't hear you...." and she repeated it again. He still said he couldn't hear her, and then both her and the girl next to her, said it in unison. He continued to egg them on and pretty soon all five girls in my car were screaming into the CB mic, "FUCK YOU!" in unison, and it was loud.
Banana Dick kept badgering them and badgering them, and they screamed it louder and louder. All of a sudden a Hopkins Cop pulled in behind me, and before I could say anything to the girls they shouted their little expletive. It was so loud that it echoed off the buildings on both sides of the street!
I looked into my rear view mirror only to see the red lights come on, and I pulled over. The cop walked up to my car and asked for my license, then shined his flashlight into my back seat and asked, "Is everyone over 18 in here?" The first girl to speak up and say she was, was the 14 year old, who had a bench warrant out for her arrest for beating up her dad (she was a "Biker Chick")! She said with a smile, "Yes sir, I am over 18 and so are my friends." The cop then asked for ID and she responded, "I don't have it with me." The cop then said that it was against city ordinance to yell profane words, and that I was going to get a ticket!
A few minutes later the cop came back with a citation written out to ME, for saying Fuck You, and he wrote "Fuck You," right on the ticket along with the city ordinance number! It went on MY criminal record and I didn't even say those words! I never said anything over my CB, and was quiet the whole time they were yelling at Banana Dick. The cop informed me that because I was the driver; I was responsible for what went on in my car.
I paid the fine and kept the ticket to show off to all my friends and stuff. Everyone thought it was really cool that "Mr. Goody-Two-Shoes" (my reputation back then) got a ticket for swearing in public, since none of them had ever even heard me swear before; the girls all thought it was funny too. About six months later, someone stole my ticket! That really pissed me off. If I still had it, I would frame it as a tribute to how stupid some of our laws are.
Three of the Five Girls in my car that night and their CB Handles:
-----TWINKIE_________________BAMBI______________HORNEY BANDIT-----
Not Pictured: Misty-Blue, and Dimples--the 14-year-old.
And of course, the one called....
BANANA DICK