Negative vs positive attitude

[kecleon]

Long story short - I've been stuck in a bad mood for a year or more complaining about everything and being negative without really realising it.

Caught up with an old friend who called me out on it and said this thing that might be really obvious to you but really stuck with me and made me reflect :


It's easy to be negative, but it takes hard work to be positive.


I thought on it for ages and I was being completely lazy + negative an getting nothing but more unhappiness from it which in a way validated my shit attitude.

Switched my thinking around and put all my effort into being positive about everything - making positive decisions not excuses, and iv been feeling awesome the past week. The effort really paid off and I now just feel a whole lot happier.

I know everyone's got different problems and somethings don't just go away, not trying to be preachy or anything just maybe someone finds it as helpful as me.

 

[Matt Derrick]

i agree, i have a roommate with the same problem, and it wears on me pretty hard. it's hard to be around people that are negative all the time.

 

[kecleon]

Matt I was probably your roommate to other people and feel shit about it, gonna make it up now though.

Agree with you completely highwayman its a dangerous path to walk telling people to cheer up / calm down or being annoyingly happy when it's not appropriate any shit like that especially if someones like ranting or offloading shit or worse pissed off with you.

Some people use is as a mask like being ridiculously over the top "positive"/friendly while it's basically just being passive aggressive.

Also dont think you should just bury shit you feel or try and cover it up but i was letting it consume me and not doing anything and gettin really angry about small things i had to do, bringing e veryones mood down without really paying attention to what I'm doing.

Feel a million times better just being out seeing people smile and act normal around me again. I wish someone said something earlier but probably wasn't ready to hear it.

 

[Rob Nothing]

well, there are shades. but mainly it depends on whether or not the persons balls have dropped. like if they have this high pitched winy lispy voice then there shit gets to be like nails on a chalk board if you know what I mean. but not everyone is incapable and retarded. I worked with this guy, side by side every day, detailing 200+lb metal frames with sanders grinders wirewheels DLs and this mother fucker was absolutely negative as fuck every minute every hour and complained about everything. he's in his 60's. long beard.. and he's probably one of my favorite people that I've met in a longtime. because so fucking what if life sucks, you at least gotta call it out on it's shit, you know? but I am not someone that thinks in terms of negativity and positivity, it looks more like a divide between cowards with no sense of humor and dicks with a sense of humor to outweight the world. so as far as I'm concerned, complain all you like. at least you're real.

 

[Rob Nothing]

well fwiw I don't mean anyone any offense. just being my own F'd up self and if you want to stone me for it I have no objections.
but for a guy who's got two kids and no wife I wouldn't expect to see someone so disproportionately involved and committed to our psychology here on stp when I'd think I'd have forgotten about the crusty kids when I've got kids of my own to be looking after. through this guise of optimism and superhuman internet activity I see a lonely young gent with just a few issues of his own, compensated for with this habitual patronizing and self-righteousness w/ random members. what have I done to incur your wrath?

I am a lowly member and have no ambitions at toppling someone more involved. Once again. dgaf. sorry!

but thanks for the encouragement! everyone thinks differnetly and I am not ungreatful towards good intentions and honest feedback!

oh shit forgot some other things to disclaim. I am not homophobic, and my post was not posted in anger. I am a happy drunk so I can promise you that it was with the happiest and careless of all possible attitudes. peace bro!

oh fuck something else I forgot.. sorry, but I don't consider myself a "tough guy". I speak my mind yes. but fear not the avatar, bud. it's just there because I like art and I like horror-themed shit to look at while I'm thinking. also, I'm irish too.. that makes us practically brothers!!

 

[Rob Nothing]

shit, like I said, I don't have the enthusiasm for this but will try. trust that I am trying.

1. whoa, well marriage is enough to fuck anybody up. wasn't expecting that.

2.no grudge, dude. I'm sorry if there' ssomething I've said that made you feel targeted that way. I tend to exploit free speech as much as possible, yet without any bad intentions for people I don't actually know. I appreciate your honesty though and for that wish you the best. not enough people in this day that aren't afraid to express themselves, even if it's just the internet.

3. that makes two of us then.. well no, not exactly because you are almost 15 years my older.

4. I disagree. you see my meaning when I say I have no interest in refuting you. and whether or not you pretend to not grasp that then be well brother at the very least.

5. then you should know at least remotely where I am coming from.

 

[Rob Nothing]

and 6: I like that.

 

[Rob Nothing]

that's strange. I have nothing against you and even got to liking your goofy green and blue ass after that thread about pulling together a little community over in mass. thought that was pretty rad so subscribed to your tumblr feed.

civil? like, you planning on runnin up on me with fists blazing, skeeter? maybe you are provoked because I thought you could handle it. my bad, my bad. still, not trying to be the bad guy. you wanna have a pissing contest get someone else to do it with, maybe one of your chatbox mates, and maybe it'll help keep my opinions watered down.

 

[TheWindAndRain]

Highwaymans posts are often a perfect example of the kind of over-the-top optimism with tones of passive aggression that makes him sound like he thinks he is better.

 

[Kim Chee]

For me, to be stuck in any mood sounds pretty lame.

To be forever negative would suck if I couldn't find joy when the sun rose today or that a bird decided to sing within earshot. If I couldn't be happy with life's small gifts perhaps I am just unhappy with life and might try considering looking at things a little differently.

To be forever positive even when life serves you a catshit sandwich is kind of like being in denial unless you truly like to eat catshit sandwiches. If I had to be forever positive or negative, I'd prefer positive. For me, happiness tastes so much sweeter after having experienced sadness.

I like to experience a range if feelings (I hope you don't confuse this as I like to ride an emotional roller coaster and worse yet, take unwitting victims with me on the downs). I feel that enjoying a range of emotions is a healthy way for a person to live. This won't work for everybody, but if it does work for you I think you're lucky because rocky road is better than vanilla when it comes to life.

 

[Kim Chee]

@TheWindAndRain and @highwayman both kindly keep your posts on topic as per the rules.

Thank you.

 

[MTFZX]

Long story short - I've been stuck in a bad mood for a year or more complaining about everything and being negative without really realising it.

Caught up with an old friend who called me out on it and said this thing that might be really obvious to you but really stuck with me and made me reflect :


It's easy to be negative, but it takes hard work to be positive.


I thought on it for ages and I was being completely lazy + negative an getting nothing but more unhappiness from it which in a way validated my shit attitude.

Switched my thinking around and put all my effort into being positive about everything - making positive decisions not excuses, and iv been feeling awesome the past week. The effort really paid off and I now just feel a whole lot happier.

I know everyone's got different problems and somethings don't just go away, not trying to be preachy or anything just maybe someone finds it as helpful as me.

Long story short - I've been stuck in a bad mood for a year or more complaining about everything and being negative without really realising it.

Caught up with an old friend who called me out on it and said this thing that might be really obvious to you but really stuck with me and made me reflect :


It's easy to be negative, but it takes hard work to be positive.


I thought on it for ages and I was being completely lazy + negative an getting nothing but more unhappiness from it which in a way validated my shit attitude.

Switched my thinking around and put all my effort into being positive about everything - making positive decisions not excuses, and iv been feeling awesome the past week. The effort really paid off and I now just feel a whole lot happier.

I know everyone's got different problems and somethings don't just go away, not trying to be preachy or anything just maybe someone finds it as helpful as me.

Man, i had the realization about 4 or 5 years ago, that i just constantly complained about everything all the time. I realized that it was making me miserable, and that my way of thinking was completely wrong, and that was where the problem really was. I was super pissed off at the world and frustrated and lost, so i became this bitchy, mentall aggressive person lol. Even though i knew i needed to change this, it literally took me like 3 years or so to apply the changes completely, just because it was so hard. Not saying in any way that this is what you are going through in the same ways, but i really relate to the thoughts you're presenting. It IS so easy to be really negative, It just makes for a really bleak life.

I personally believe in the idea of karma in many forms. I think doing good things (which is started by thinking good thoughts) result in good things happening, and bad things causing bad things. My life always seems to be exponentially better when im thinking in the right light. There is obviously no proof for this, but ive been attempting this for years, and the evidence ive seen has led to it being a pretty concrete understanding of mine. It has, at the very least, made me much more content. I spent many years in crippling depression and suicidal thoughts. When i made the mental change fully, i lost the depression and acquired severe anxiety lol. I think it just comes with the territory.