# Housed up and restless



## OrphXan (May 27, 2019)

I'm housed up now in New Brunswick (Canada)... I'm trying to get clean. Changing my environment/surroundings is a lot harder than I imagined. At least, sticking with it. 

I've been wearing..uh.. clean? Clothes mostly these days and I took some of my piercings out. My lifestyle has dramatically changedand part of me is torn about it. I feel like I'm living a double life in my heart and it's a very delicately balanced shred of stability that I've got in my life with very few positive supports that I can relate to. Everytime I get lost in my mind about just taking off or putting in the work to build something sustainable here, I can hear a train off in the distance passing through town and since this is a crew change, catching out is very realistic. So now it's just commiting to putting down some roots here and finding a way to sustain a future that still allows and improves my future that includes travelling.. and travelling enough to keep me satisfied and not derailing my progress and spiralling out of control with any habbits that aren't healthy


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## IDoRails69 (May 27, 2019)

Good job getting clean. That shit is hard. But it pays off. Once you beat it you just think smarter. Just think of what you CAN do without those vices... ALOT. And the main thing is life is more of a steady ride than it is extreme highs followed by extreme lows. Keep it up. You'll find your peace. Glad you haven't given up on travelling. Holler if you need a friend! ✌😎


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## Koala (May 27, 2019)

When I'm housed up longer-term working or whatever, I spend heaps of time at train yards, watching trains n writing monikers. And I stay connected on StP and Instagram to see when travelers come thru my home yard! I spent this summer shuttling riders to Wal-Mart and from one end of the yard to the other, waiting with them, delivering beer n snacks to the hop out, ended up building a hop out shelter lean-to with a rider I met...it helped me feel still really connected to the road and I learned lots more about riding and trains and made some new great friends.

I recommend to stay true to your hobbies in this way, and you'll feel less restless while at work and surrounded by normies!


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## iamwhatiam (May 28, 2019)

OrphXan said:


> I'm housed up now in New Brunswick (Canada)... I'm trying to get clean. Changing my environment/surroundings is a lot harder than I imagined. At least, sticking with it.


Good on you for deciding to change your life around! I've been where you're at, as I'm sure many others on here have been. IMO, changing your environment/surroundings is the best first step you can take to getting clean. It may be the only way. The whole getting and staying clean thing gets easier with time....the urges will never completely go away, but it does get easier. I haven't touched a needle in years but I STILL get drug dreams and certain things that trigger me. When I DO think about it, I just remember all the times I spent horribly dope sick, what that felt like, and all the time in life I wasted with it.

Keep yourself busy with projects and hobbies, and surround yourself with good wholesome people. Wishing you the best!


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## Deleted member 25534 (May 28, 2019)

Respect for making those positive changes, I was there myself a few years back, it was excruciating at times but worth it, and it improved my experience 10 fold when I did get back out on the road. I'm somewhat housed up myself at the moment, I feel you on that, but I try to stay centered with creative things, music, writing, and lots of walks/reading in any nature I can find. Setting up roots somewhere for a bit isn't always the worst thing, if it's a positive environment, having something/somewhere to fall back on is never a bad thing either. The road will always be there, taking some time off can be just as rewarding depending on your perspective. Hang in there and best of luck with everything!


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## benton (Jun 2, 2019)

rest is not to be underestimated in my view


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## Deleted member 14481 (Jun 28, 2019)

Take the break for what it is. Trying to plan for the future is one way to put unnecessary stress on an otherwise decent situation.


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