# Recently settled down and have nothing in common with the guys in my city.



## Tommyb (Jan 3, 2016)

So I just got out of a relationship with a fellow travler.
I want to date again but I feel like every gay dude in this city is way to normal or I share no interests with. There is a small punk scene here but they are all straight.
No I don't want to go to the fucking mall or to fucking dance club. I want to drink 40s under A Bridge and not have to worry about smelling like axe body spray whe. We hang out.
I'm not going to change myself for a dude but what the hell nobody likes to party.
Anyone have any advice or know the feeling?


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## Juerito (Jan 4, 2016)

Forreal though, stereotypical gay kids are so boring/annoying/unattractive. I feel you.


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## iamwhatiam (Jan 4, 2016)

i feel you man. I have pretty much given up on gay clubs/bars. once in a while I may go to one for some eye candy but I feel sooo uncomfortable and out of place in there, and I hate the stereotypical club music they ALWAYS have blaring inside.

"What? you don't work a normal job?" No.
"Did you hear that latest Gaga/Minaj/Swift song?" Um...no.
"Are you homeless? Why are your clothes (insert ripped, dirty, etc)?" ....Rolls eyes and looks for exit. Buys cheapest malt liquor can find and heads for patch of woods.

Don't give up hope man. Tho the gay dirty travelin kid may be few and far between, we are out there.


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## Tommyb (Jan 4, 2016)

Yup Its really lame.
I just seems like Its almost uniformed
Your supposed to act and look a certain way
Or most gay guys find you completely out of your mind haha.
I don't even want to resort myself to a hook up at this point because I feel like I will be lowering the standards I don't really have


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## Juerito (Jan 4, 2016)

Haha forreal. I always have faith that love is right around the unexpected corner. I'm just a hopeless romantic though, never really down for hookups. It's cool to know that other gay dudes are out on the road


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## Matt Derrick (Jan 5, 2016)

are you up for going somewhere else? i see this question here on stp sometimes, and my usual advice is to go where the radical queer folks are. maybe like idapalooza or something like that?


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## iamwhatiam (Jan 5, 2016)

Matt Derrick said:


> are you up for going somewhere else? i see this question here on stp sometimes, and my usual advice is to go where the radical queer folks are. maybe like idapalooza or something like that?


how have I not heard of idapalooza? have you been there before?


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## Matt Derrick (Jan 5, 2016)

i have not been before... i've heard of it a bunch of times through my anarchist/radical friends. i've seen pictures and heard stories and it sounds really great if you're queer 

to be honest though, it might sound dumb but i would feel really awkward attending since i'm a cis male. ida is really geared towards providing a liberating space for queer folk, so i would just feel like the weird straight guy trying to invade someone's safe space if that makes sense (i just woke up).


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## iamwhatiam (Jan 5, 2016)

Matt Derrick said:


> i have not been before... i've heard of it a bunch of times through my anarchist/radical friends. i've seen pictures and heard stories and it sounds really great if you're queer
> 
> to be honest though, it might sound dumb but i would feel really awkward attending since i'm a cis male. ida is really geared towards providing a liberating space for queer folk, so i would just feel like the weird straight guy trying to invade someone's safe space if that makes sense (i just woke up).


that's understandable


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## deleted user (Jan 5, 2016)

I understand the restless feeling of that and it sucks. Hopefully you resting and or making some money or whatever to get out of where you are. Just remember it won't last forever.


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## face (Jan 9, 2016)

Idapalooza is an event at a community called Idea. It was great but I would have felt more comfortable if I was into dressing extra queer. I got lots of a "who's the straight guy" vibe (not straight.) Hit them up and I bet you could stay for a while. Short Mountain is another "Radical Fairy" community nearby. I think that fermentation expert Sandor Katz lives there. There is a community near Bellows Falls VT, one in Oregon, one in NM.. Lots of cool queers in New England.


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## Nerdypunkkid (Oct 24, 2016)

I feel the same way, just to different and not gay enough, to fit in with the normal gay group


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## chuddette (Jan 18, 2017)

Hmm my friend is gay. He's the gnarliest dude that comes to the skatepark and smells like a dirty sock and loves to drink 40s and complains about the same things you are. we are in Pennsylvania


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