# stealth pissing (aimed -no pun- for the guys....)



## ScumRag (Nov 5, 2018)

ever got caught by the PD for pissing in public?
tonight at the bus depot -i shit you not- a cruiser went by, did their little flash dance & said on their loud speaker
"DONT DO IT AGAIN!"

well, fuck man! I gotta piss somehwere. the bathrooms are closed cuz of 9/11 and so i'm caught waving at the cops
with my D in my hand. 

any tips im missing cuz i really don't wanna go down as a sex offender just fer waving my D in an alley


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## Anagor (Nov 5, 2018)

Yep, but fortunately with no consequences, just being told "not to do it again" as you experienced it.

Well, tips ... when I needed to ... and nothing was open (no McD, no KFC, etc, no puplic toilets) I always tried to find a really quite alleyway where you wouldn't be surprised by cops or some park where you can go behind some bushes or alike.

But it can be difficult and annoying. Especially in large cities where it's hard to find a spot with no one (and no cctv) around.

Basel, Switzerland was best. Public, self-cleaning toilets everywhere, and you could use them for free.


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## saul (Nov 5, 2018)

yea this one time i actually got detained and they didn't let me go till i proved to them that i wasn't wanted


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## Jackthereaper (Nov 5, 2018)

I usually have good luck peeing into bushes etc near rivers and in quiet parks. Remember, the last thing you wanna do is turn around and piss on the cops legs and shoes (a mate did that and wound up beaten up and arrested for the night(drunk tank))


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## Eng JR Lupo RV323 (Nov 5, 2018)

Just take 2 more minutes to find a better spot. Train tracks off the right of way behind buildings, in the bushes near freeway onramps/offramps, places that distance you from a road that's easy for them to roll up on you.


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## Vance Lee (Nov 5, 2018)

I take this very seriously because of the sex offender part attached these days. I sit yes, sit in metro areas where it is impossible to hold and find a safe spot because of closings. I have gotten quite used to it actually. That dumb law, made it very practical for me. I find that a parking lot - Publix or some other, sitting on the parking block facing away from the roadway and if possible, in the medians also within a parking lot. It is much easier for them to tell you to quit loitering than stop pissing. Sitting is very stealthy for Men, no one expects that is what you are doing. Just wing it out and keep your feet out of the way


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## Eng JR Lupo RV323 (Nov 5, 2018)

Also be aware of your posturing. If you're using both hands and arching your back, it's pretty fuckin obvious what you're doing. If you're looking at your phone with one hand raised up and kinda standing in a way that makes pissing uncomfortable, maybe even direct that stream off to the side that way you're not facing directly at a bush or whatever. There's all kinds of tricks to making it less obvious.


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## Deleted member 125 (Nov 5, 2018)

Vance Lee said:


> I take this very seriously because of the sex offender part attached these days. I sit yes, sit in metro areas where it is impossible to hold and find a safe spot because of closings. I have gotten quite used to it actually. That dumb law, made it very practical for me. I find that a parking lot - Publix or some other, sitting on the parking block facing away from the roadway and if possible, in the medians also within a parking lot. It is much easier for them to tell you to quit loitering than stop pissing. Sitting is very stealthy for Men, no one expects that is what you are doing. Just wing it out and keep your feet out of the way



you must be pulling some david copperfield shit with a 24 inch dick that you can just unroll away from you while you pee or im picturing this completely wrong, because i dont see anyway to sit down and stealthy take a piss without pissing all over myself or cutting up my johnson on my zipper trying to hide the fact that i got skin in hand.


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## ScumRag (Nov 5, 2018)

SlankyLanky said:


> you must be pulling some david copperfield shit with a 24 inch dick that you can just unroll away from you while you pee or im picturing this completely wrong, because i dont see anyway to sit down and stealthy take a piss without pissing all over myself or cutting up my johnson on my zipper trying to hide the fact that i got skin in hand.



Yeah rite? Wtf is that shit about? I can't sit & piss even in shorts


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## Vance Lee (Nov 5, 2018)

Well, I haven't had to do it in anything but shorts - I'm in Florida. I sit and pull the shorts to the side and let go - quickly. That is as graphic as I need to be I guess. Each there own, but at 55, it is not as easily held as it once was.  Not unlike pissing in a gatorade bottle on a road trip.


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## Deleted member 125 (Nov 5, 2018)

Vance Lee said:


> Well, I haven't had to do it in anything but shorts - I'm in Florida. I sit and pull the shorts to the side and let go - quickly.



i just dont see how this is any more practical then just pissing behind a building or on a wall, if a cop rolled up outta nowhere and told you to move on theres really nothing hiding the (what im assuming at this point since you had to piss so bad) giant piss puddle right under neath you.


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## Vance Lee (Nov 5, 2018)

Well, I use a bottle. And like I said, a lot of times there is NO BUSH or other obstacle.


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## Vance Lee (Nov 5, 2018)

ScumRag said:


> Yeah rite? Wtf is that shit about? I can't sit & piss even in shorts


There is an awful lot you can do, when you must.


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## Django (Nov 5, 2018)

I was once asked by a bored security guard "hey! What'ya doing there?".
He was like yelling at me, saving the day this hero fuck.
I was at the end, making sure no drops back in pants, so the asshole assumed I was jerking off or something.

I looked at him straight in the eyes and said "well, what do you think I was doing?"

What a jerk. It wasn't anywhere near children, or people for that matter. ANY reasonable person would understand I was just peeing


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## Mrcharwe (Nov 5, 2018)

What I do is unzip your fly, kneel down on one knee, pull it out and go. If anyone looks, act like you are tying your shoe. It works best in grass, but you can do it between cars as long as the ground slopes away from your knee.


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## Tude (Nov 5, 2018)

Good lord - I work downtown - I see pissers all the time. Just keep on moving and remember what my sister said when we were in Mexico - "see that wet spot up ahead? Keep in mind that it has not rained here in 4 months - and there were many wet spots in the corners ...". Eyes down and step lightly.


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## mono (Nov 7, 2018)

can't speak for anywhere else but if you're ever in the UK i wouldn't worry about this - they don't give a shit as long as you're not very blatantly pissing in the middle of the street

if it seems like you've made even the vaguest bit of effort going somewhere people wouldn't normally go they'll likely let you off - unless you're very obviously drunk, at which point they might nab you for that instead


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## Desperado Deluxe (Nov 7, 2018)

Just remember the privatization of restrooms is a violation of your rights!


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## roughdraft (Nov 7, 2018)

Gaucho Deluxe said:


> Just remember the privatization of restrooms is a violation of your rights!



quite fuckin accurate


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## Anagor (Nov 7, 2018)

mono said:


> can't speak for anywhere else but if you're ever in the UK i wouldn't worry about this - they don't give a shit as long as you're not very blatantly pissing in the middle of the street



I woudld worry about it. I was in UK ...


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## roughdraft (Nov 7, 2018)

Tude said:


> Good lord - I work downtown - I see pissers all the time. Just keep on moving and remember what my sister said when we were in Mexico - "see that wet spot up ahead? Keep in mind that it has not rained here in 4 months - and there were many wet spots in the corners ...". Eyes down and step lightly.



this doesn't surprise me, in the city where i stay right now i was in the most crowded part the other day and hello! a little boy pissing into the street in broad daylight. who's gonna say anything? love the common sense down here. ya gotta go ya gotta go!


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## Big Sister (Nov 10, 2018)

Let me share with you all my *PEE TENT* strategy:

I spend a lot of time in the city, so sometimes there *is* no quiet, out of the way, place to go. Plus, sometimes I am just laying down and I don't want to move anywhere.

What I do is stand on my knees, and make a tent with my sleeping bag or blanket completely covering me, then pee into a cup inside.

In the city they're all over the place, I just take one out of the trash or save one for later. Just make sure you get a big enough cup. 

Ladies can do this too, I've seen it.


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## Dameon (Nov 10, 2018)

I've been caught by cops a couple of times, once 4 of us went to go piss against a wall at the same time, and turned around to a cop laughing at us...he'd been there the whole time. Just warnings every time, second time the cops didn't even bother to run my name.

One important ability is to learn to piss hands-off. Just get that baby out, aim, and put your hands in some natural way, and you can get creative where you go. For example, between two cars in a parking lot can work well if you're just standing there looking at your phone, if anybody sees you they'll just assume you just got out of one of the cars and are checking directions or whatever.

Never known anybody who actually had to register as a sex offender just because they got caught peeing in public.


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## noothgrush (Dec 10, 2018)

pissing-as-you-walk down a dark street or alley works for me, or into a bottle behind a dumpster and chucking into the garbage afterwords. (once i pissed into a bottle and left it in my car during a long haul drive and my friend took a blind sip mistaking it for Gatorade)


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## All Who Wander (Jan 6, 2019)

Im just waiting for this to start happening...


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## Matt Derrick (Jan 6, 2019)

All Who Wander said:


> Im just waiting for this to start happening...




it's a funny video, but really, the solution would be to add more publicly accessible urinals.


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## All Who Wander (Jan 6, 2019)

Matt Derrick said:


> it's a funny video, but really, the solution would be to add more publicly accessible urinals.



But it's always the same problem... we need to build more homeless shelters, more warming rooms, more public bathrooms, more free pools and showers, more services for poor and disenfranchised... but the people who are working, paying taxes, and voting generally don't want to pay for it and the people who really need it the most have almost no power or representation. 

I figure soon they will just start putting walls and guardhouses around suburbs and close them to public travel.


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## Matt Derrick (Jan 6, 2019)

All Who Wander said:


> But it's always the same problem... we need to build more homeless shelters, more warming rooms, more public bathrooms, more free pools and showers, more services for poor and disenfranchised... but the people who are working, paying taxes, and voting generally don't want to pay for it and the people who really need it the most have almost no power or representation.
> 
> I figure soon they will just start putting walls and guardhouses around suburbs and close them to public travel.



the reason there's always going to be a 'need for more' is because they never built the ones being asked for in the first place. it's not an unending problem, it's a solvable one that people in power don't want to spend the money on because it doesn't make them any profit.


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## BusGypsy (Jan 6, 2019)

ScumRag said:


> ever got caught by the PD for pissing in public?
> tonight at the bus depot -i shit you not- a cruiser went by, did their little flash dance & said on their loud speaker
> "DONT DO IT AGAIN!"
> 
> ...



In my experience, at least here in Seattle, since the Starbucks fiasco (kicking out a black guy for sitting) and more recently The Doubletree Hotel disaster (kicked out a black guest), a lot of businesses have stopped enforcing the standard bathroom rules. They don't want to get busted. 
Since the Starbucks thing, you can use any Starbucks bathroom without getting kicked out.
I work at a hotel. Go in, ask to use restroom. Be polite, try not to look scary- pull up your damn pants and pull down your hoodie, it ain't raining inside!
I was at a Panera in SD once; a guy asked for the restroom code and they wouldn't give it to him; so instead he pissed on the restroom door. Panera kind of deserved that.
If you're a POC, I hate to say it but this will especially work for you in today's political climate. Nobody wants to be that fired Starbucks manager or Front Desk associate.
And the cops are assholes for busting you for peeing. Where are you supposed to? They don't care.


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## T Paradise (Jan 6, 2019)

A variant of the pee tent: Get in the poncho tarp you should be carrying anyway and piss in a bottle. Or sit on a bench cover what you have to cover with a jacket and piss.


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## All Who Wander (Jan 6, 2019)

Matt Derrick said:


> the reason there's always going to be a 'need for more' is because they never built the ones being asked for in the first place. it's not an unending problem, it's a solvable one that people in power don't want to spend the money on because it doesn't make them any profit.



But its not some shady hidden billionare club. Public funds those kinds of city developments. Generally regular voters are against spending that money as there are other emergencies they'd rather spend public funds on other than the needs of homeless.


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## All Who Wander (Jan 6, 2019)

BusGypsy said:


> In my experience, at least here in Seattle, since the Starbucks fiasco (kicking out a black guy for sitting) and more recently The Doubletree Hotel disaster (kicked out a black guest), a lot of businesses have stopped enforcing the standard bathroom rules. They don't want to get busted.
> Since the Starbucks thing, you can use any Starbucks bathroom without getting kicked out.
> I work at a hotel. Go in, ask to use restroom. Be polite, try not to look scary- pull up your damn pants and pull down your hoodie, it ain't raining inside!
> I was at a Panera in SD once; a guy asked for the restroom code and they wouldn't give it to him; so instead he pissed on the restroom door. Panera kind of deserved that.
> ...



Our hotel says "our bathroom is for guest use only, its not public." And we kick em out and if they start heading towards the ashtray or dumpster we tell em to leave or we're calling the cops. And if theres no free bathroom at a coffee shop nearby your supposed to buy a .50 cent cookie at mc donalds and use their bathroom.


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## Anagor (Jan 7, 2019)

Matt Derrick said:


> it's a funny video, but really, the solution would be to add more publicly accessible urinals.



Yes, and it doesn't have to be expensive, especially when it comes to urinals.

Amsterdam is a good example:







https://www.nicerightnow.com/destinations/europe/netherlands/amsterdam-urinals/

Basel (yes, Switzerland is quite rich  ) offers more sophisticated toilets:






They are self-cleaning and free to use.

Never had any problems to find a toilet even in the middle of the night in Amsterdam or Basel.


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## NomadFisherman (Feb 27, 2019)

I had a dirty kid show me this trick before I started traveling and it is weird as fuck but shit works.
Pull your trow down to about mid thigh sitting down, like elbows resting on knees. Make sure you got a gap under your pants aim your dick under and piss. 

It's so unusually so inconspicuous people don't realize what your doing till your done.


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