# east PA insanity + cat and mouse with cops



## Diagaro (Aug 21, 2010)

NOTE:Some names have been changed so as to not offend some folk but the implied descriptives were all implied by the individuals themselves from the get go. I do not personally condone sexist, racial or demeaning behavior just an observer.
8/21/2010
3:25 Pm 
Dansburry park east Stroudsburg, Pa

Well this has to be the most interesting 12 hours of my life by far.
I'm sitting amongst a bunch of church folks in a park in eastern rural Pennsylvania, just as I was yesterday, drawn by the prospect of free food; earlier this week flying a sign downtown "spare something green??" a pastor and Christian book store owner came and gave me 2$ from the store register and said if I was still around next week I was welcome to come to the park and join in a gathering of several area churches - at least eat free food all weekend.
So here I am just as I was yesterday. The food and drink was put away about 10 PM and they seemed to need someone to stay around and watch the residual stuff - nothing really worth messing with to anyone. But I offered several times but they said no over and over again. Just before all the churchys left a blue pickup truck pulled up and a butch girl from earlier that day who had asked me for a cigarette in front of the Kmart got out toting a VERRY drunk waif of a girl. butch girl (well call her jenny from now on) so jenny hardly recognized me but tended to her drunken female prize - or so I thought very soon the truck came back. Two older guys a younger somewhat homely girl and a younger guy (Marcus) turned out he was the designated guy to watch the Christians park gear over night his girlfriend was the drunk girl who was now having a marathon puking session with the trash can in the far corner of the picnic covered area. The non pickup driving old dude was named Steve the driver a fat flop of annoying shit I don't know his name but he kept shining a single bulb LED flashlight in everybody's eyes and spewing apologys the drunk girl kept yelling for "babbbby" and often asking for him to rub her back. He would tell her to shut the hell up from a distance and she would fall face first on the cement. All this I laughed heartily at while drinking a beer Steve would call to her telling her that she was a this and a that and to shut up and other fucked up shit - why should I care? I laughed so damn hard . . . 
Soon three people came through the darkness. All three turned out were between 18 to 25 and announced to all that they were "not straight" in a more derogatory manner and ( we will call them *not straight* as I was laughing too hard to hear names + there names are not important) as three doller bills and not ashamed to flaunt there *notstraightness* to all freely.
Steve gave them some shit for being *not straight* and they schmoozed around and took pity on the puking girl yelling at Marcus to come and take care of his girl I laughed harder when Steve said something about *notstraights* everywhere and the three guys started rolling there necks and snapping there fingers and saying "OH-no-you-di-nt" and Oh I know he didn't just call us that" one even said "Mr. Man you are out numbered by us, maybe we should come over there and crack your head for you" I fell off the bench dumping my beer unable to breathe this was a riot . . .
They walked off and the not drunk younger girl went with them during all this the fat man and the jenny left to get more beer and the police had come now Steve said "oh shit! the cops!" and was gone I kept laughing and went to the front of the covered area - closer to the cops but sat next to my bag so it would not be left behind somehow totally exposed to the cops about 400 feet to my 10 o'clock in there cars driver side to driver side possibly taking about some ball game or swapping high school blow job under the bleachers stories they sat like this for a good 30 minutes I got bored and shouldered my bag keeping sure to keep my packs reflector out of sight to them lest to reflect in there headlights and give my self away. I returned back to the incapacitated girl now laying under the bench in the far corner in a huge puddle of bile Marcus shoving her lower telling her "oh shit baby the cops are here get you head down" . . . I don't think her head could get any lower into her own puke if there was a hole in the cement big enough for her face to sink into . . .
Steve came back and said wheres Diagaro? I said "I'm right here" and he said something that got me cracking up again witch lead to us getting loud again to the point that the cops had to have heard us but they never came our way. . . Fuck we were too loud to not have been heard even if the po's had radios blaring and talking to each other over them but they left after about 5 more minutes of us being loud like that. Then maybe another 10 minutes I seen the blue truck driving around like it was trying to find the entrance of the park. he came to the front of the the covering and left all his lights on like a big fool.
Marcus said load up we are going. The jenny started yelling about some stupid shit and after alot of bad noise me, my bag, Marcus and Steve piled into the back of the truck and the drunk girl on the jenny's lap in the passenger seat. Fatty backed up . . . RIGHT INTO THE U-HAUL the churches had brought!!!! He did some other four wheeled fumbling and finally we got the fuck out of the park parking lot and onto open street . . . . riding the double yellow!!! Oncoming traffic dodging off the road over curbs and into yards, Marcus yelled at them to learn how to drive wile Steve kicked him in the ribs and I laughed at all this even harder. We came up to a T junction, us having to turn either left or right on this major street trying to wait at the red light the truck kept moving - creeping really in to the busy intersection cars honking I yelled at the driver "may as well run it now! GET THE FUCK OUT OF DODGE!!!" he did just as the light turned green anyways two lane and he was driving straight down the white line. By now Marcus had finished his beer and was yelling at the driver "MOAR BEER, TURN RIGHT HERE, RIGHT, RIGHT, WE NEED BEER!!!!" he turned right, right over the curb and sidewalk into the right aid parking lot and across it over the curb and sidewalk again now were on a one way street - going the wrong way! Marcus yells "here turn here" oh dear god I think as we turn into a parking space slanted for traffic traveling in the opposite direction!!! but it seems were ok now . . . except the truck keeps going!!! Engine racing way too high like he forgot what peddle is the brake and wich is the gas or the brakes are going out or throttle cable is sticking he manages somehow to stop the out of control pickup a mere inches away from smashing into the front of the banks sidewalk ATM.
Other drunks are standing there staring at us in front of the bar in disbelief. Marcus is yelling for more beer, Steve is telling him to shut the hell up the jenny threw the drunk girl on the ground outside the truck and jumped out to start yelling at the drunks in front of the bar that the fat guy driving tried to kill her. Me I'm amazed were still alive!
Fat man drives off with jenny soon after the last thing to happen is the jenny yells "I'm a lesbian, I only like pussy, Marcus give me a kiss" Marcus toungs her right there, faces right in front of the fat drivers face, jenny slobbers all over the driver meanwile the drunk girl is up and telling someone in front of the bar how good Marcus is to her.
Then jenny kisses the driver and tells him about how wild a night she is gonna give him - I'm laughing again.
Marcus hands me a handful of change and asks me to go and buy a four loko so I go into the bar and wait till the tender gives me the beverage and when I go back outside the cops are there and they are hassling everybody. I stand there with a four loko in my hand watching and open it just as the cops are pouring out Steves four loko I take a drink of mine I confer with some chick smoking outside of the bar about what happened she says "the one with his shirt off saw a cop drive by and started yelling at him and throwing stuff at him" I think what the fuck?!?!?! Marcus is insane!!! I like this guy!!!
Well the cops leave and Marcus, his girl and Steve come over and start yelling about the tickets they got Marcus starts shredding it and throwing it at people and chews a piece and spits it at the bar window the bartender comes out and start screaming at him we mosey over to the steps leading through the building to the alley in back we sit on the steps and Steve goes for another beer we sit and drink our beers and continue on this Kamikaze war path with anything that moves or speaks. Marcus soon tires and lays down face first on the pavement and his girl (at this point after watching her for nearly 2 hours she is 100% insane total wingnut status) she sits next to him and begs him to get up Steve says hes going home and offers me a better place to stay saying he lives in an abandoned warehouse he calls the "boillerworks" we trek to the north end of east Strasbourg and just where I got spooked the previous night that I had camped out side of the wendys there was this huge warehouse right next to the tracks complete with derelict boxcars sitting on axillary tracks he shuffles into a room and says "this is mine, go find your own" I stagger into the main chamber and see some steps leading up into some kind of storage loft or formans office and lay my bag down in the soot and dust
and slept.
When I woke I lit my 3rd to last cigarette and exited my room and went down the stairs and ascended the ladder to the right just before I landed on the cement slabs of the massive warehouse floor. At the top I was abreast of a massive kiln or cement lined boiler, some large steel and cement covered cylindrical object about 40 feet up. Just as I really started to wake up and enjoy my morning cigarette (though it was about 12:30 pm) I heard a crunch down the warehouse length I crouched down and to my surprise I saw 3 cops in full street gear with M16's fully equipped with all kinds of gadgets sweeping from room to room on the west side of the main building. I watched and my pulse quickened I knew that any movement would probably make noise on the rotting steel covered with cement debris so I stayed frozen forgetting entirely about my burning cigarette I watched one cop broke away from the pack and slowly made his way toward the stair landing not with rifle up in the safety position but letting his muzzle lead him in full ready stance. They were ok in the sneaky and quiet department; but just not good enough if I chose to I could have traversed the whole place like an urban warfare gorilla and never been heard they were sloppy and poorly trained as the cop came slowly step by step up the stairs the edge of his rifle mounted flashlight played with my lazy cigarette smoke I was now close enough to piss down the V neck of his collar. He came to the top of the stair case and entered the room I was just in leaving his back to me I knew that it was too late to announce my presence and if he noticed me I would probably get shot. He scanned my room totally missing my backpack and drunkenly made bed of clean clothes and totally ignored the lavatory in the room next to it. I was so close I could hear him breathing I could have kicked him in the back of the head and I still did not move, even breathe. He turned around I swear he saw me; blue jeans and iron gray thermal , black rag with red and white skulls on it around my neck, leaning on the banister with both arms, cigarette between middle and index and yet he slid down the stairs with no notice of me less than 2 feet from him. I breathed out a sigh of relief and snuffed my smoke and lay down on the dirty deck and covered my head in case they backtracked for some reason I heard them moving around down the way and eventually heard what I swear was a car door closing moderately firm I re lit my cigarette and went back to my room and lay down and waited a little more.
After I was sure they had left I gathered my shit and shouldered my pack and went about exploring the compound its too grand to try to list but suffice to say it is fucking huge!!!
got to chase cigarettes now as I am well fed by the grace of god.


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## BUMJUG (Aug 22, 2010)

ohh shit....haha i think weve all met a marcus........


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## Dannywaste (Aug 22, 2010)

Holy goddamn. Hell of a night. Glad you're ass didn't get pinched.


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## Diagaro (Aug 22, 2010)

Shyt, talken to some locals I'm lucky I didn't get shot in the face.
Just hung with Marcus again today, hes one of those guys thats fun to hang with once in a wile bit too tough and your bound to go to jail for something. he belongs back in the wild west days - a real hellrazer.


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## Diagaro (Nov 17, 2010)

Heres where I slept. the stair case and structure I stood on wile the cop walked by me is to the left






Looking south down the expanse of the main building




And looking north





Artistic BW fisheye of the compound




Yea thease are not my Pixures, i had to steal them from someones photo hosting site cus a friend had used all my cellphone minutes up - but I would have taken thease exact same pixures had i still had minutes on my phone


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## Storm Smokes Rocks (Aug 17, 2011)

crazy story man


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## plagueship (Aug 21, 2011)

i'm being That Guy but for crying out loud.
gigantic blocks of text with no returns make me eyes blur.

especially white on black.

use the return key.
it is your friend.
and i can read your stories and be your friend too


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