# I just wanna be on the road again



## GinGin (Aug 9, 2015)

Yep. Just like the title says, is how I feel. Life is good don't get me wrong, but shit just doesn't make sense without being on the road. My ideals: sold for 9.50 an hour at a local convenient store, for a paycheck I have no idea how to spend(or save for that matter ). So, obviously the most reasonable way to spend it is on some dank weed and ridiculously flavored blunts with the occasional natty daddy or OE thrown in for good measure, right!? Wrong. Shit sucks dude. That shit doesn't really solve the problem, granted though it does get me fucked up which is always good, but damn man shit still sucks when that shit fades out. I feel like I'm slowly turning myself into a zombie, with my full permission and I don't even feel like I care. But I do. Memories of being on the road, hopping out, and meeting the nicest and craziest people you ever expect to ever meet feel like a dream. They just don't feel real anymorel. Especially when your looking down the barrel of meaningless employment, monotony, an alienation. I feel like I'm killing that old part of myself off, and I don't know how to feel about it. That bullshit line "you're an adult now and this is what adults do" keeps running thorough my head and it's frankly fucking retarded to me. Fuck being an "adult" I'm 23 years old and goddammit I still feel like a kid. I just want to say fuck the future and enjoy my time on this earth riding trains and doing me(whatever the fuck that means) But I do have a good and loving family, no matter how hard life was growing up they always had my back and I am eternally grateful. Being Cape Verdean means a lot, culturally we fall along the lines of family first and the idea of codependency is commonplace, more so than most cultures. So I'm here now in my hometown trying not to make my grandmother, my mom, my aunt, and my sisters cry when I say I want to leave an get back on the road. A lot of people say you gotta live your own life but when I look at it a lot of people lived their lives for me instead of their own, so brushing them off is pretty hard( and fucked up) thing to do. At the same time I see no high paying job in my future so the good I am to them seems insignificant if jot futile, but I don't know. Maybe next summer I'll be back on the road, maybe I won't, I can't say for sure. All I know now is that in pretty buzzed and bored as fuck, which I a extremely privileged existence in comparison to most of the people on this earth, so I guess I should jut shut the fuck up and be happy. Anyways signing off, hopefully there's more resin in this pipe to be smoked


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## Tude (Aug 9, 2015)

That's a lot of typing there dude! and a lot of your life. Where you thinking of taking off too? I understand the family worrying - I get that even now and I am certainly not a youngster when I talk with my Mom (sister and brothers are a meh - they are used to me with the more wild lifestyle hehe) . But they are family.

You know where you are going to head - I'm planning a trip or trips myself - love to plan. Have fun and be safe (as I always say.)


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## Anagor (Aug 9, 2015)

GinGin said:


> That bullshit line "you're an adult now and this is what adults do" keeps running thorough my head and it's frankly fucking retarded to me. Fuck being an "adult" I'm 23 years old and goddammit I still feel like a kid.



Fuck being an "adult" I'm 41 years old and goddammit I still feel like a kid. 



GinGin said:


> I just want to say fuck the future and enjoy my time on this earth riding trains and doing me(whatever the fuck that means)



Yep. I started all this only about a year ago. (Not riding trains, not feasible here. But backpacking, traveling and stuff.) Will head out to my next trip next week, hopefully.



GinGin said:


> At the same time I see no high paying job in my future so the good I am to them seems insignificant if jot futile, but I don't know.



I can relate, absolutely.

Just follow your heart.


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## spectacular (Aug 9, 2015)

People go thru years of meaningless employment and still kick it all off to go travel or do what they want. You're only killing off as much of yourself as you think you are.


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## Andrea Van Scoyoc (Aug 9, 2015)

When all is said and done, live your life the best way you can.

Look back, ponder, reminisce, but never regret.

Each step , misstep and adventure or catastrophe will shape you.

Best of luck...


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## GinGin (Aug 9, 2015)

Thanks everyone for the responses, it feels a lot better to get that out there and it is all much appreciated. I'm not hearing anywhere atm, but when the time comes I'll prolly hit up the southeast to calif maybe. Who knows though, I'm he gonna go with the flow in the meantime. Thanks again though guys, and be safe and happy wether you're traveling or not. Peace


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## Art101 (Aug 9, 2015)

I feel ya man.I am stuck in mundania do to my own doing.It makes me crazy and actually rather irritable to sit and ponder and stress.I too have family and friends that stressed when I was out on the road and doing my thing.I stayed in touch.Usually a weekly call to let them know I am ok or a posting on social media seems to settle nerves some.Remember all good things come to those who believe in themselves no matter where they are.


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## Corinne (Aug 9, 2015)

Tldr...dude, just do it!


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## CelticWanderer (Aug 9, 2015)

I'm in the same boat right now man. All this shit seems fuckin stupid to me but i know my body isnt ganna be able to keep up with me in the later years an on top of that I hate beggin for money and I got no people skills so landing odd jobs is damn near impossible for me. I gatta work for my shit ya know? 
but god damn if i don't wanna burn my fuckin' uniform and go do whatever somewhere else. 
The way I see it though, I gatta get some skills under my belt so i can get a good job when something happens and I need one. So it's like being in a bow and ur the arrow or some shit. Getting drug back way far and all tense and shit from workin and then being shot out into the wild blue when the time is right.


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## Sip (Aug 9, 2015)

I'd kill for a little mundania right now. Ready for a home and a steady paycheck. Been traveling and kicking around this summer and I'm tired of begging and scrounging just to make it by. But I always feel like this at the end of the summer.  Once January gets here I'll kill for the road.


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