# What is your guys sketchiest experience on the road?



## Frodo (Apr 7, 2016)

me and two other home bums were chilling in cheeseman park in denver at like 2 in the morning. all of the sudden we were surrounded by the silhouettes of like 8 gangsters. they just sat there in silence for a good 10 minutes about 15-20 feet away from us. I think they were hoping to see if we were sleeping, because when we yelled fuck off, they slinked back to whatever hole the crawled out of. heard from a friend they got a 'sodomy' problem at that park. ew. now that's not too crazy of a story, but damn if i didnt have my knife on my chest expecting the fight of my life and its my submission for now. but what about you guys, what crazy gang wars have you been dragged into, scams, jumpings, crazy assholes, fights, crimes, whatever did you end up in the middle of that really made you shit your pants?


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## kokomojoe (Apr 7, 2016)

My first night in Portland I ended up accidentally smoking meth out of a bong for the first time with this one other random homeless dude. I had thought it was weed cause I was drunk sleeping under a bridge near the hop out and he woke me up and was like, "hey wanna smoke?" So I was like "sure fuck yeah" and he sparked the bong and as soon as I exhaled I looked at him like, "dude wtf is that?" He just casually was like, "Oh it's meth!" Not the sketchiest thing but definitely could've gone pretty bad with certain individuals
.
EDIT: Just noticed this song was playing as I was writing this, how fitting lol


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## HitchTube (Apr 7, 2016)

Trying to hitchhike from Haiti to Dominican Republic


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## wizehop (Apr 7, 2016)

Frodo said:


> we were surrounded by the silhouettes of like 8 gangsters. they just sat there in silence for a good 10 minutes about 15-20 feet away from us. I think they were hoping to see if we were sleeping, because when we yelled fuck off, they slinked back to whatever hole the crawled out of. heard from a friend they got a 'sodomy' problem at that park. ew.



Pretty soft gangsters, to just take off like that...sounds more like you were in a gay cruising park. I have had my fare share of those rides hitching, one of the many reasons why I prefer trains.


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## Vulture (Apr 7, 2016)

I took a ride to the grocery store to get fags. The guy stopped for me. 40 something years old, black and in PJ's. I couldn't pass up a break on my feet. Well, after getting smokes, he asked if there was anything I needed to do. I said no. He asked if I wanted something to eat. Why not? Walk into his house, miles away from camp. He gives me the ingredients to a bologna sandwich. We walk into the basement. He has a room at the end of the hall. I sit in a chair near the door. He''s on the other side of a curtain, so when we are talking, I am facing fabric. He asks me if I mind if he gets high. Why not? I peak over and he's almost naked. The tube flicks on for a moment and gay port is on. It flicks back off, he apologizes. It flicks back on and stays on. He switches the conversation to sex. He tells me I am attractive. Then fortunately, a guy calls him to a drug deal. He smokes some weed, to compliment the meth? And we hit the road. Yikes!


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## Frodo (Apr 7, 2016)

wizehop said:


> Pretty soft gangsters, to just take off like that...sounds more like you were in a gay cruising park. I have had my fare share of those rides hitching, one of the many reasons why I prefer trains.


yeah, im pretty sure thats what they were, but it was the gang rapist vibe that i didn't like. i mean if your cruising for consensual dick, just ask god damn.


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## iamwhatiam (Apr 7, 2016)

I will have to think on that. ive been in plenty of sketchy situations but I cant remember right now. but I have awoken before to find tweekers just standing there over me staring down. thats for sure pretty creepy. had one crazy guy come up to me in the park shouting that we was gonna bash my fucking head in with an iron rod he was holding in his hand because he thought I was following him. wtf? turns out this was the same guy who had been banned from all libraries in the area after exposing himself to a little girl in the children's section one day.

Almost went home with a cop who offered me place to stay. I declined and later found out that he got off on beating up young homeless guys and then raping them....yea some sick fucks out there


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## Deleted member 2626 (Apr 7, 2016)

kokomojoe, how was the meth? I had a friend who got robbed in Amarillo by some black dudes. Stupid things that sometimes paranoia creates. . . with me at times. i walked through downtown denver after a rideshare in november and out of it. wasn't sketchy at all near all the college shit. had some sketchy rides this year, My first homosexual come on. I was walking out of Knoxville on side road 11W which goes North actually and got the ole double take and he came back. Gave me and the pooch a ride up the road to a town I cannot recall and was gonna get food in the store and leave me there. I went in to get my peanut butter and bread and saw him pushing an empty car and he came out with nothing. Back outside he comes up to us and says he'll actually take us further now. Okay. Not long later, we are talking, a lot of just me keeping things easy, and I say something about my unappealing appearance or something and he says he disagrees. then a bit later during like some conversation about whatever he tosses in there real quick, you gay or straight? I'm like what and he repeats. I said naw sorry straight but I'm cool with whatever others do and that i have a gal back home which I do not. And he goes to say he was molested and I'm like damn. . and get him off the sexual stuff quick and all went well and he gave us a good ride a ways to a little plaza and park. I oddly never have too many. 
In Scranton, PA i was outside a grocery store kind of listening to this out of it lady and gave her a banana and some junkie shows up shooting the shit. He was a decent guy but tried to give me the story line i never buy. anyway a lady I had noticed came back out and was pacing and looking all over the place for her phone. Her giant husband shows up and they GPS track it and it shows up right in the vicinity of the entrance and where me and my dog and junkie are sitting. He's like guys its no big deal but do you have it. I tell him I'll dump all my shit if I have to. The junky didn't have it either he was sitting talking the whole time. I think I remember them saying something about police but they left and so did I. just a circumstance instance.


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## Tony Pro (Apr 7, 2016)

A guy once offered to sell me weed.
That's the best I got. I guess I'm either blessed or doing something wrong.


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## Vulture (Apr 7, 2016)

Walking around town, West Hollywood at 2AM, I pass a bar. A guy and two other guys stumble out. One asks me if I want to party. Why not? Then if I want weed, apparently 80 bucks worth. I turn it down. He asks if I want the 11inch cock, he knows a guy and can get it to me. No thanks. You smoke meth? No...


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## Desperado Deluxe (Apr 7, 2016)

I was in riverside. And I was with my gf and these two guys roll up on us after a long day of walking and they offer to hang out with us and buy us some weed and beer. After saying they were entrepeneurs who were into selling things... yea first clue to bad news.. anyway my gf says let's hang out with them and I said no. I didn't trust the situation but if I didn't go along with her decision I wouldn't have heard the end of it. 

anyways we end up getting in their car they buy us some booze and take us out to shoot some pool. Afterwards we go out and score some weed from some people they knew. We eventually come to a little convenience store to get more beer or whatever and I fallowed the two guys into the store to get smokes they run out of the store jump into the car and peel out with my gf and our gear. All the while the shop clerk is assualting me because I these guys told him I was going to steal from him. I try to get on my phone in front of the store trying to call my gf hoping they might come back. The shop keeper keeps trying to attack me and I try to explain what happened to him to no avail.

Shortly after my phone dies and I go from place to place looking for a charger for it to no avail. (This is back in the day when phones didn't have the standard micro usb set up.) So after a hellish night. I grabbed some cardboard and passed out in a gutter.

The next morning I woke up puked a couple a feet from where I was sleeping and went on a search for a phone store. Finding one I got my phone charged I called my gf and the police. (They didn't do shit of course) shortly after I got ahold of her and found she was in DT LA so I jumped on the metro link without paying and met up with her.

She said she had been arrested for drunk in public last night during the course of her raising hell because these guys had kidnapped her. It happened at the pool hall that we were at earlier while these guys were bullshitting her about how I might be there.

So we ended up going down to skid row and spending the night at a homeless shelter luckily we found some sheets to sleep with and a nice guy smoked some weed with us. Afterwards we went down to hollywood and tried to get our shit together because our gear had got stolen.


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## Vulture (Apr 7, 2016)

Fox Spirit said:


> I was in riverside. And I was with my gf and these two guys roll up on us after a long day of walking and they offer to hang out with us and buy us some weed and beer. After saying they were entrepeneurs who were into selling things... yea first clue to bad news.. anyway my gf says let's hang out with them and I said no. I didn't trust the situation but if I didn't go along with her decision I wouldn't have heard the end of it.
> 
> anyways we end up getting in their car they buy us some booze and take us out to shoot some pool. Afterwards we go out and score some weed from some people they knew. We eventually come to a little convenience store to get more beer or whatever and I fallowed the two guys into the store to get smokes they run out of the store jump into the car and peel out with my gf and our gear. All the while the shop clerk is assualting me because I these guys told him I was going to steal from him. I try to get on my phone in front of the store trying to call my gf hoping they might come back. The shop keeper keeps trying to attack me and I try to explain what happened to him to no avail.
> 
> ...


Think that tops everything above you....shit.


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## wanderlovejosh (Apr 8, 2016)

Trying to get to the beach out east...my being distracted by a guy giving us a ride that turned out to be a jesus freak.. instead of going left we went right on a road... it led us to the back roads of west virgina... not some where you wanna me.. they make the movies wrong turn for a reason.. either way.. after a few hours we were walking and all of the sudden we were someone yell "Hey you guys wanna beer"....
of course after walking in the sun for hour we do want one.. so we walk to the house.. its pretty.. "trashy" i guess you would say... they invite us to have food, as they were cooking on the grill, then we could contine our route.. 

well I thought i would show my greatfullness by offering to buy them some beer.. don't do that for rednecks ...... not smart...

for some reason the guy was threatened by me.. he kept constantly saying .. " just dont' do anyting stupid and there wont' be any problems". 
which didn't make sense to me cuz i'm not that stupid and i have no interest in creating issues for me and my wife....
so after him constantly talking about how there was a shot gun loaded on the bedroom bed.. he eventually went and got a 357 magnum and brought it out... proceeded to say some gargen then point the gun at me... i tried to stay calm and ask that he please not point that at me... and he fired it in the air.. at this point i was worried that by leaving it would piss him off and set him off... so after he said we could camp on the side of the house... we tried to go to sleep where they proceeded to be drunk and at one point while i was sleeping fired a shot gun across our tent...

after freakign out waking up.. they chuckled and said.. oh sorry about that...
then did it again about 1 min later.. at that point we packed our sleeping bag and pad in our bag and jetted out of there... leaving our tent behind... going down a dark back country west virginia road.... while on the road we jumped to the side of every car that came by thinking what if its them pissed off... finally coming to a small town where we slept in the park... 

not fun.... not fun


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## kokomojoe (Apr 8, 2016)

Tatanka said:


> kokomojoe, how was the meth? .....


It was pretty high quality I suppose, from what people have told me it's typical to find high quality around there. It might've been terrible since I really have nothing to compare it to lol. I don't fuck with hard shit anymore, even if it's free. Weed, occasional psychedelics, and beer is pretty much all I'll mess with nowadays.


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## awkwardshelby (Apr 8, 2016)

Frodo said:


> me and two other home bums were chilling in cheeseman park in denver at like 2 in the morning. all of the sudden we were surrounded by the silhouettes of like 8 gangsters.



damn all I saw in my head was the silhouettes of the goons from a clockwork orange. 

I had a guy in San Francisco stare me down on the subway shouting, "I'm the only superhero in San Francisco! And I'm Gay! But do I have a boyfriend? No! Do I give a fuck? No!" And he went on for about ten minutes, scooting closer and closer to where I was sitting and then proceeded to piss on one of the seats. I got off at the next stop before he got any closer to me.


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## Dmac (Apr 8, 2016)

I wonder why nobody wanted to be his boyfriend.


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## Wawa (Apr 8, 2016)

Nothing actually happened that was too bad, but....A night in bakersfield. Ugh. 

Dude follows me around screaming "WHOOOORE!" until I lose him. Gas station guy freaks out when I ask for water. Buses won't pick me up. Watching guys being slammed around and cuffed by cops with dogs next to my sleeping spot. 

Slept with my boots and pack on, ready to bolt. Since, I've found much better spots in bakersfield.


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## Desperado Deluxe (Apr 9, 2016)

Wawa said:


> Nothing actually happened that was too bad, but....A night in bakersfield. Ugh.
> 
> Dude follows me around screaming "WHOOOORE!" until I lose him. Gas station guy freaks out when I ask for water. Buses won't pick me up. Watching guys being slammed around and cuffed by cops with dogs next to my sleeping spot.
> 
> Slept with my boots and pack on, ready to bolt. Since, I've found much better spots in bakersfield.



Just one of those places that your NOT supposed to get off the train..


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## iflewoverthecuckoosnest (Apr 9, 2016)

Considering that I'm a tiny girl who travels alone quite a lot, nothing too sketchy has happened... at least not yet, and I'd like to keep it that way 

So far the only uncomfortable experiences I've had took place in Fort Ross along the Highway 1 in CA. Itsy bitsy coastal town, only a very vintage gas station, a few hotels, some cool parks to hike around, rural houses nestled in the woods, oh, and OF COURSE A FUCK TON OF MISSING PERSON POSTERS FEATURING YOUNG WOMEN RIGHT AROUND MY AGE.

That alone set me on edge. Then this older man with long, gray hair cornered me in the gas station and began inquiring about my pot smoking habits. 
"I don't have any right now, sorry," I said.
He followed me out to the wagon and started asking me if I was traveling alone. He tried to get me to go back to his house to sleep in his yard. He could've just been a horny old guy, but I was not about to take my chances, especially since I didn't have cell service, and something about him was off putting.
Later that night I was parked at the same gas station. It was closed. Nobody else in the parking lot but me. I was just sitting in the wagon with a lantern, reading my map, figuring out where I would stop next.
This big SUV pulled up, driven by a balding man in his mid 30's. He motioned for me to roll my window down. Nope. I waved my hand and mouthed, "I'm fine."
He started trying to ask me questions.
Was I lost?
Was I traveling alone?
Did I need help?
Was I sure?
Once it became clear that I wasn't about to roll my window down, he finally left me alone.
I mean, it's not like I was scared for my life, and for all I know they could have meant well, but I don't regret being cautious one bit. Something about it seemed wrong, and I couldn't take any chances. When in doubt, don't.


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## Rob Nothing (Apr 9, 2016)

Technically not been 'on the road' very long. More years spent homeless / outside than traveling at this point. There've been many times I thought it was going to turn sketchy and was prepared for the worst, and then it didn't get sketchy at all but stayed in that grey area where shit just feels strange.

I've already told this one on this board I think but probably the most sketched out I've ever felt was in sacramento, my first week hitchhiking. I was stuck there a while, and one night I was walking toward a truckstop out on the north west side down el camino road at 2 in the morning cause the buses were all out of service and I was coming from downtown. I get to a bridge over the rail tracks and there are no lights or street lamps on the far side, but what looks like a wooded area on either side. I was a few blocks away from the lightrail and there was someone else that had come from the same direction walking half a block behind me. Just before I get to the bridge I hear screaming and yelling behind me and when I turn to look I see a mob of maybe 8-12 dudes come out of nowhere and run down this other ped and apparently start beating him.
I was fairly sure I was next but kept walking at the same speed, maybe slower than before, over the bridge. I hear shouts from down below too... and that was when I felt nearly convinced that I was F***ed. But I just kept walking. And nothing happened to me the next 2 hours all the way out to the truck stop. I felt like a lucky sob when I finally laid down for sleep.


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## Adnil (Apr 9, 2016)

Not my most sketchiest, but perhaps the quickest story to tell.
Coming down to the palm tree that held my friend's and my gear I got stopped by the view of a scrawny pale homebum. He wasn't grabbing our belongings or anything, he seemed to just be enjoying the shade that laid in front of the hidden city. Firm words were exchanged as I was trying to figure out why this man wasn't leaving. Homeboy homebum burst out laughing informing me that I was a pretty pretty girl and that I better keep an eye on my back if I didn't want to catch myself getting hurt. I looked at him funny then ordered him to move it. Right as he was out of sight I called my friend begging them to get back because we had to change our post. He assumed I was geeking out on the M again and told me to relax, just as another man who I knew was approaching. I hung up in relief and asked the favor of them to keep an eye while I wrapped my gear together, they chucked and did me my favor. Being back at an old camp with the man I knew before I got a call from my friend the next morning. "THERE IS SHIT EVERYWHERE!". Huh? Turned out the homebum took another visit to bum spray our gear down at the palm tree. Because sometimes a threat, is more shit than a fist.


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## TheWindAndRain (Apr 9, 2016)

I have more but here are some of the worst:

Boone NC a guy invites me over for food. His apartment is filled with children's toys, guns, bolts on the door and bars over the windows. He makes me some food which i sneakily throw away when he leaves the room. He comes back and asks why i didn't eat it. On the counter in front of me is a gallon jug half filled with a rainbow assortment of thousands of pulls. He offers that i can take as many of those pills as i want...
something is very wrong here but i need a shower. While showering i notice a flower shaped mirror permanently cemented into the wall. Suspecting a hidden camera i flip it off. Dude hollers from the other room at me. I turn off the shower and get dressed. When i open the door he is standing there flipping me off. He admits to a child pornography operation and offers to show me the tapes. NOPE.

The worst was a serial killer in brownwood texas. He hinted toward raping and killing homeless and kept asking me if i had lost phone service yet. Fortunately i never lost service and kept my phone out. When he finally stopped, unlocking the door on my side was futile and i couldnt open it. The driver asked if i wanted to come to his house. NOPE. He unlocked my door remotely from his side and i jumped away. 

I have also been shot at, threatened with knives, woken up by bears and any number of other animals over my face, but people are the spookiest.


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## Frodo (Apr 9, 2016)

TheWindAndRain said:


> I have more but here are some of the worst:
> 
> Boone NC a guy invites me over for food. His apartment is filled with children's toys, guns, bolts on the door and bars over the windows. He makes me some food which i sneakily throw away when he leaves the room. He comes back and asks why i didn't eat it. On the counter in front of me is a gallon jug half filled with a rainbow assortment of thousands of pulls. He offers that i can take as many of those pills as i want...
> something is very wrong here but i need a shower. While showering i notice a flower shaped mirror permanently cemented into the wall. Suspecting a hidden camera i flip it off. Dude hollers from the other room at me. I turn off the shower and get dressed. When i open the door he is standing there flipping me off. He admits to a child pornography operation and offers to show me the tapes. NOPE.
> ...


Jesus christ. x 2. some sick sons of bitches out there. I know everyone hates cops, but i would have a little chit chat with the fbi on the child porn dude. what the fuck. and the serial killer? damn. honestly, im just glad you are still here to talk about it.


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## WanderLost Radical (Apr 10, 2016)

http://m.phnompenhpost.com/national/blackjack-scam-bust-tourists

This shit happened to me. I played along, trying to find a good time to fuck off quietly, but at some point they had me back to my room to get my credit card, I slid a knife in my pocket, ready to kick and stab my way out. Went to the ATM, played the "all my money's in another account I can't access right now" card and everything ended well. 

Also, everytime my hitchhiking driver talks on the phone (I only hitched in Asia so far, so obviously in a foreign language) then tells me he has a friend that can house me up for the night, I get a really bad vibe. I know they mean well, everytime I accept, nothing happened, but idk... i always find it sketchy.


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## kokomojoe (Apr 19, 2016)

Not sure if I've posted this story on here before in a different thread. It's more funny than anything, still kinda sketchy though.

I was with a buddy of mine and we were heading east from San Francisco so we went over to Oakland to desert yard. We had been up most of the night before at the south end of the yard with no luck seeing anything so I was pretty tired. We were in this empty lot surrounded by concrete barriers by Target with the tracks not far from us. We smoked a bowl and chilled waited to see if an eastbound was going to come through. I ended up passing out while my buddy stayed awake to keep an eye on things. About an hour or two later I wake up, it's probably around like 10 or 11am maybe? and there's this random crustpunk dude with no gear and didn't seem like a traveler or anything. He's got a case of Corona and is sitting by us drinking it, really quiet dude and kinda strange, didn't hardly say anything to either of us. I look at my buddy and point at the dude, like who the fuck is this, he just shrugs his shoulders and looks as confused as I was. I just sat there and rolled a cigarette while trying to figure out wtf's up with our new friend here. Neither me nor my buddy were drinking any just cause we didn't really drink that much at the time and I can't say I like warm Corona anyways.

It was around this time a couple cop cars pull up on the road by the lot we're in and they get out and start walking towards us. I forget what they said exactly but their attention was more focused on this random dude than us. I remember them asking him where he got the beer and if he was just in Target and he just stared at them. They pulled out their tasers and aim at the dude, my buddy's like, is it cool if we move over there? (since we weren't trying to get tased) one of the cops just sorta nods and motions us over to the side. We're just sitting there watching the cops tell this dude to drop the beer and put his hands behind his back and get on the ground. 

This is the part I found funny. The dude just sits in this weird pose with beer still in hand and starts doing these weird ass yoga/tai chi motions with his hands for a minute or two, and then throws his beer in an attempt to break the bottle but it just bounces and rolls on the ground. He then slowly puts his hands on his head and the cops cuff him and take him to the car. I don't know how the fuck he didn't get tased. They come back and are asking us if we knew him, what was he doing, etc. They were pretty chill towards us and just thanked us and left. Apparently the dude just walked into Target, grabbed the beer and walked out with it and security was yelling at him and called the cops. Definitely a strange dude.


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## codycodnyk (Apr 20, 2016)

Nothing too crazy but I bumped into a homebum at the train station who was geeking off something, I know he was smokimg k2 and his tongue had a giant black spot on it when he laughed. He was tripping hard and seeing shit and getting angry that i wasnt cosigning his hallucinations of people attacking him. So I ended up giving him the rest of my joint and told him I was headed to a party. He kept asking to come, and said 'I got some goodies'. I said wat kind, and he said, 'lets just say I have a bunch of pills up my asshole' and did this crazy laugh. Then he started getting really foxlike and asked how much money I had and that he had a knife, and made a reach into gis jacket. I hopped up and jumped back, grabbed a rock and told him to back off or id chuck it at him. Worst part was the other homebum geeking on k2 was nowhere to be seen and I already knew he was trouble. 
Was a good party though and made up for a shitty night


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## TheWindAndRain (Apr 20, 2016)

Frodo said:


> Jesus christ. x 2. some sick sons of bitches out there. I know everyone hates cops, but i would have a little chit chat with the fbi on the child porn dude. what the fuck. and the serial killer? damn. honestly, im just glad you are still here to talk about it.



Heres another scary one. I once stepped into some woods on the south side of Dallas to pee at night. That section of the Trinity River bottoms is no stranger to having dead bodies turn up. Headlights suddenly shone on me from the woods and shots were being fired at me. I ran up to the bridge and ducked behind a concrete barrier and the shots stopped. When i poked my head back up the Headlights were still facing me and the shots resumed. I could hear ricochets near me. I ran crablike along the shoulder of the bridge trying to stay below the cover of the short concrete wall for a half mile before standing back up and fleeing. They never came up onto the road to finish the job. The most fucked up part was this was right adjacent to a shooting range so no one would question the noise of the gunfire. Here is the exact spot where it happened,

https://goo.gl/maps/8iDjwMY5igK2

you can see the river I had to cross and the shooting range 200 feet to the north.


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## roguetrader (Apr 20, 2016)

back in my hard drinkin' daze we went upcountry to a Punx Picnic in Derby, bout 2 in the mornin' i get a yen to score a bag or 2 of gear (H) and approach this group of homebum's who'd found the party... one of em' agrees to cop for me if i buy him one so we scuttle off to the call box.... while he phones round i find myself waiting squashed up against his girl in a narrow door way - he speaks to his man and we head off into a very dark and very quiet car park to meet the dealer - he asks me to get the cash ready and i dip in my pocket and its NOT THERE - well this is on the same side as the girl was sat and i decide in my drunken state that the bitch had dipped me SO a massive argument ensues with him calling me a fuckin' wind up cunt and i better sort the money or else, and me shouting fuck you yo girl has stolen the fucking money when she sat so close to me and draped herself across me... well after a few rounds of this he whips out a switchblade and SNAP i got a knife too mutherfucker so you wanna get to it ? i was mad, he was mad and we just about to start tryna stab each other when a security sweep patrol car comes into the car park and sits there with us in the headlights.... so the blades get put away real quick and the homebum fucks off muttering threats about what will happen next time he see's me....... funny thing was i found the £30 in my jacket the next morning - it had falling thru a hole in the pocket into the lining ! and i am so glad the situation didn't end in a stab fest - i'm generally totally chill / non violent but i don't let people walk all over me and drinking absinthe that night had put me in a borderline psycho mood anyway, like it does a lot of people.....


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## coyote mogollon (Aug 11, 2018)

HitchTube said:


> Trying to hitchhike from Haiti to Dominican Republic


thats friggin gnarl.....much respect, wanna hear how it turned out


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## coyote mogollon (Aug 11, 2018)

roguetrader said:


> back in my hard drinkin' daze we went upcountry to a Punx Picnic in Derby, bout 2 in the mornin' i get a yen to score a bag or 2 of gear (H) and approach this group of homebum's who'd found the party... one of em' agrees to cop for me if i buy him one so we scuttle off to the call box.... while he phones round i find myself waiting squashed up against his girl in a narrow door way - he speaks to his man and we head off into a very dark and very quiet car park to meet the dealer - he asks me to get the cash ready and i dip in my pocket and its NOT THERE - well this is on the same side as the girl was sat and i decide in my drunken state that the bitch had dipped me SO a massive argument ensues with him calling me a fuckin' wind up cunt and i better sort the money or else, and me shouting fuck you yo girl has stolen the fucking money when she sat so close to me and draped herself across me... well after a few rounds of this he whips out a switchblade and SNAP i got a knife too mutherfucker so you wanna get to it ? i was mad, he was mad and we just about to start tryna stab each other when a security sweep patrol car comes into the car park and sits there with us in the headlights.... so the blades get put away real quick and the homebum fucks off muttering threats about what will happen next time he see's me....... funny thing was i found the £30 in my jacket the next morning - it had falling thru a hole in the pocket into the lining ! and i am so glad the situation didn't end in a stab fest - i'm generally totally chill / non violent but i don't let people walk all over me and drinking absinthe that night had put me in a borderline psycho mood anyway, like it does a lot of people.....








So I've hitched all across the 48, Mex, Guat, Scotland, etc....only one extremely CREEPY TALE. I was up around the Canadian border, outsida Cour d' Lane Idaho, when a dude picks me up, starts to ask the typical biographical questions... i feel he's gay, but no prob, but its the WAY HE RESPONDS to my answers that clue me. He consistantly tries to fit in to my answers, like "oh yea i'm into art too, in fact I gotta pull over here, I'm waitng on a few paintings my firend has sold me. Do you want a massage while I'm waitng?' Like I'm gonna let hin crawl on top of my back, in a van.... 
I'm like no thanks and bail quicklike, shouldering my pack. But i know just to hit the onramp is not cool, so i hide up on a spot where i can see the freeway. Dudes van passes by again n again n again, for over an hour. I still think I shoulda called someone, the fuzz, whoever. He was bad news, I felt it from the start.


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## Tinman (Aug 12, 2018)

A few...

1) Stranded in the Arizona desert, no rides, no cash. Supposed to get down to 30deg that night and we (my buddy and I) had no camping gear at all, we were in t-shirts. I call the cops on us ‘cause I figure a night in the tank beats freezing to death. Cop takes us to a homeless shelter in Casa Grande, instead. They bed us down (we’d missed dinner) in a ten by ten room with two other dudes, in bunk beds. We go to sleep with our clothes on, wrapped in smelly blankets. Wake up in the middle of the night with two dudes (not the two in the other bunks) trying to steal my shoes, right off my feet, which is pretty fuckin’ weird because they’re beat up sneakers and not big enough to fit either of these dudes. I scream like a siren, kick Dude#1 in the teeth and try to scramble out of bunk. Dude number two grabs me and pushes me back down, one hand over my mouth. I sank my teeth into the meat of his hand and shook my head like a terrier with a rat. He screams, my buddy lands on his back from the top bunk and gets a choke hold. Dude #1 starts punching my buddy. I make it out of the bed and punch Dude #1 a couple times, but Dude #2 has got loose and knocks me down. Both guys bolt from the room. Nobody shows up to investigate the noise. The other two guys in the room, I can see their eyes open, but no words are exchanged. My buddy and I spent the rest of the night sleeping in shifts. The next morning one of our roommates introduces himself as Larry, a homeless preacher. He explains that he spends 6months a year working in the states saving money to live on, the other six months, preaching at a church he’s built in a village in Mexico. He apologizes for not helping with the shoe theives, and invites us to breakfast. We’re hungry, so we go. He takes us to a place called “WannaBurger” and buys us whatever their equivalent of a McMuffin was. Weird trip. 

2) Walking back to a friend’s apartment from the bar one night, late, pleasant buzz going. I notice some dude tailing me. I’m kinda meandering and walking slow, but he doesn’t overtake me, maintains distance. My nerves are jangling. Within 30 ft of me he says, in throaty whisper “I’ll suck your dick.” I’m not in the market for such a service by the side of a residential street, so I increase my pace without saying anything. When I glance back again he’s gained on me and is now within 20ft. He says, louder, like the issue is that I didn’t hear his irresistible offer the first time. “Hey! I’ll suck your dick!” I shake my head in the negative and walk as fast as I can without breaking into a run. When I glance back next he’s kept pace and is no farther away. I pull my pocket knife and threaten with it. I say “Leave me alone.” Just that. He stops forward motion. I turn and walk briskly on. When I glance back a second later, he’s in the same spot where I left him, with his dick out, masturbating furiously. I continued to my buddy’s place, without my nice buzz. 

3) Stopped at a crappy motel in Oxnard, California. Waited in line to check in behind an obvious streetwalker and her embarrassed client. The clerk knew her name. He rented us a room, we went to it and discovered that the door had been kicked in at some point and didn’t lock. Didn’t even latch. That part of the door jam was missing. There was a Brick for propping it closed. A brick. I went back down to the desk and told the clerk our room didn’t lock. He stared at me like I was asking for room service caviar and said “Is that a problem?” I said “Yeah, Man. That’s a problem. I want a room with a door that locks.” He sighs. “Fine. Take the honeymoon suite.” Hands me a new key. I go get my homie and we walk down to the new room. It features mirrors on the ceiling, two twin beds, and one double, heart-shaped bed with coin vibration, up on a Dias under the mirrors. My buddy goes “I’m not going near that one.” Pointing at the heart shaped bed. I said “Do what you want, I’ve got a sleeping bag, I’m on the floor.” After a moments pause, he did the same. 

Those are the three sketchiest adventures I can think of off hand... oh, I should tell about some shit in Tijuana... maybe next time. Anyway, those were what I thought of first.


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