# when did you realize you weren't normal?



## freegander (Mar 26, 2017)

was it a long, painful process of trying to fit in or have you always known? 

bonus: do you think anyone really is "normal"? does their inner soul truly resonate with social norms, or have they just conformed?


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## Matt Derrick (Mar 26, 2017)

Probably just conformed. I think most people have the potential to be unique but most choose to do what society tells us.

There are of course people that were just born to be robots or cogs in the machine. 

For me it was going to Christian school and realizing it was all bullshit in my sophomore year.


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## deleted user (Mar 27, 2017)

I had never thought of it as being not normal, but all of my life I have stayed very true to my own principles; whereas most people rely on what everyone else thinks or does, I go based off of what I feel myself and think myself. Fortunately or unfortunately, it's always been odd or unique in my case. 

As for my friends, I have had some friends that have steered away from the "norm", but they really just deviated into what I call an "alt norm", which is pretty much just a culture that, although different than the norm, really perpetuates the same kind of "herding". I mean, I respect these people a lot, but I can see that they are, at times, no different than normal people, only that the guidelines they follow are a deviant of the norm. But, that's just my analysis of it. When you study human nature, you realize that there aren't really too many different kinds of people, only different backgrounds. 

That was a blanket statement that will surely catch some fire on here, but what I am saying is that, yes, we are all snowflakes, yada yada yada, but ultimately, we have certain predispositions to react to things in a certain way, and the only REAL difference in any two same-type people is the situations they have experienced.

I'm an INFP, so that should kinda describe what's up with me; I imagine there might be a couple of those types here.


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## lunarfox (Mar 27, 2017)

I went through a long process of trying to fit in, but mostly that occurred at school. I grew up pretty poor for the most part, & the high school that I went to, up until 10th grade, had a lot of stuck up, Abercrombie wearing rich kids.
The girls all had the same shade of platinum blonde hair and fake tan skin, and sadly my first year of high school, I really wanted to have what they had. It's pathetic though. I even bleached my hair at home and it was this horrible yellow, peroxidey shade. I always knew I wasn't like them though but I guess I was pretty desperate for acceptance.
It wasn't until after I dropped out and flew to SoCal that I realized how dumb it was to try conform to something I wasn't After that I started trying to figure out what it was that I liked, and who I was. 

I'm only 20, so I still have a lot of searching and growing to do. 
Did you ever go through a period of trying to fit in? I envy people that never gave a fuck about what other people thought. ​


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## deleted user (Mar 27, 2017)

lunarfox said:


> I went through a long process of trying to fit in, but mostly that occurred at school. I grew up pretty poor for the most part, & the high school that I went to, up until 10th grade, had a lot of stuck up, Abercrombie wearing rich kids.
> The girls all had the same shade of platinum blonde hair and fake tan skin, and sadly my first year of high school, I really wanted to have what they had. It's pathetic though. I even bleached my hair at home and it was this horrible yellow, peroxidey shade. I always knew I wasn't like them though but I guess I was pretty desperate for acceptance.
> It wasn't until after I dropped out and flew to SoCal that I realized how dumb it was to try conform to something I wasn't After that I started trying to figure out what it was that I liked, and who I was.
> 
> ...



Ugh, and even though I liked a lot of them (including you), theater kids drove me nuts. Like, they were just always so happy and loud and being all attention-grabby. Probably just a pessimistic dickhead, but that always kinda annoyed me. I feel stupid about it now, because I think I was just jealous that I didn't have friends like that, but the only reason I didn't is BECAUSE I was such a dickhead. 

Thankfully I have embraced my open heart and open mind a lot more now.


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## ntdxc1878 (Mar 27, 2017)

I think in regards to living a vagabond type of lifestyle and traveling, it really happened when I went to college my first year. Headed off to a big school, on a scholarship, ready to be a business mogul and make lots of money.

Then I get there and realize I didn't want any of that. People get too caught up in a cycle of college, debt, job, kids, etc. I didn't want that cookie cutter life, so here I am now. It's been a big realization for me, but definitely not a sudden one, I could feel it coming a long way off. All and all, as long as people are happy with the lives they live and feel that they are making positive impacts on the world and people, it really doesn't matter if they live the most bland life or the most extravagant and wild, at least in my opinion.


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## deleted user (Mar 27, 2017)

ntdxc1878 said:


> it really doesn't matter if they live the most bland life or the most extravagant and wild, at least in my opinion.



This.


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## lunarfox (Mar 27, 2017)

moonwalker said:


> Ugh, and even though I liked a lot of them (including you), theater kids drove me nuts. Like, they were just always so happy and loud and being all attention-grabby. Probably just a pessimistic dickhead, but that always kinda annoyed me. I feel stupid about it now, because I think I was just jealous that I didn't have friends like that, but the only reason I didn't is BECAUSE I was such a dickhead.
> 
> Thankfully I have embraced my open heart and open mind a lot more now.



Oh my God, I didn't like them either! I was bullied by them. I think I was kinda jealous of them too, lmao, they were just another group I couldn't fit in with.


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## deleted user (Mar 27, 2017)

lunarfox said:


> Oh my God, I didn't like them either! I was bullied hard core by them. They'd call me my first and last name but put Dumb in front of it. I think I was kinda jealous of them too, lmao, they were just another group I couldn't fit in with.



Every group had its cool folks, but they were always surrounded by others. But, it feels good to know I wasn't the only person who didn't particularly enjoy the "cool kids".


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## ntdxc1878 (Mar 27, 2017)

lunarfox said:


> I went through a long process of trying to fit in, but mostly that occurred at school. I grew up pretty poor for the most part, & the high school that I went to, up until 10th grade, had a lot of stuck up, Abercrombie wearing rich kids.
> The girls all had the same shade of platinum blonde hair and fake tan skin, and sadly my first year of high school, I really wanted to have what they had. It's pathetic though. I even bleached my hair at home and it was this horrible yellow, peroxidey shade. I always knew I wasn't like them though but I guess I was pretty desperate for acceptance.
> It wasn't until after I dropped out and flew to SoCal that I realized how dumb it was to try conform to something I wasn't After that I started trying to figure out what it was that I liked, and who I was.
> 
> ...


I've definitely had periods in my life where I looked at people and just wanted to meet that standard or be like they were. At the end of the day it never seems like it ends well, I've just tried to learn to be me, and if you don't like what I am then fuck you (lol). People that don't accept that aren't worth another second of your time. It's been really freeing not trying to meet anyone's expectations for me and just live how I see fit. Definitely felt a more of an inner peace after you drop all that baggage.


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## Fatboy (Mar 27, 2017)

Ive felt weird my whole life. Im an INTJ the rarest of the types so yeah I was always the odd one out.


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## freegander (Mar 27, 2017)

Matt Derrick said:


> Probably just conformed. I think most people have the potential to be unique but most choose to do what society tells us.
> 
> There are of course people that were just born to be robots or cogs in the machine.



so how do you tell the difference? are those in the first group miserable while those in the latter are content? 

until very recently, i believed that everyone thought like me deep down. but now i'm not so sure. i want to believe that everyone has just been crushed into this mold by society, but sometimes it's hard to see that they didn't choose it. 

i was homeschooled my entire life in a rural area, so i was VERY socially stunted when i started college. all through college, i tried to adapt and fit in. and i was successful. unfortunately, i tend to prioritize the needs and wants of others above my own, so i buried myself under the weight of everyone else's personalities. i never experienced social disconnect because i would mould myself to meet people where they were at. 

the summer before my senior year, i spent a lot of time with myself. living in a city where i knew no one. biking to work. doing things that i wanted to do. tuning into my inner heart beat. 

towards the end of the summer, some friends came to visit me. we went out for dinner and i cried myself to sleep that night because i realized i had changed. it was like looking into the mirror and seeing a different face. i detested the shallowness of their gossip and felt, for the first time since entering college, _very_ out of place. i had discovered myself and i was either going to have to grow distant from people that i loved or force myself into their mold again. 

the next semester, i got ill and i guess that was my body forcing me to isolate, avoiding the inevitable indecision. so i accidentally distanced myself from some people, but also got closer to others. now i feel more like myself, but am i just conforming to a different social norm or is it really me? 

“It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson

that is the struggle of my life. i lived in an anarchist community for a bit last summer, and i feel that i really got a sense of who i was apart from societal pressures. sometimes i just think i was subject to _different_ societal pressures, but the community valued independence so highly that i didn't feel pressured to be anything. it felt very much like being in solitude amongst a crowd. 

i guess i've been hearing rumors that i wasn't normal my whole life, but i only chose to listen to that voice when i felt a sense of belonging in a community of _really strange_ people.


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## Anagor (Mar 27, 2017)

Well, interesting question. 

I think I realized it beginning of 2015. I started all this quite late, with 40. Not being in a very good mood in 2014 I found some videos about riding freight and StP by chance. That made me think about going on a backpacking trip in England - something I had never done before (and never thought about before).

Well, mildly interesting so far, cause it really was "backpacking" only. Trevelling by coach/bus, sleeping in hostels on paid vacation. But I visited quite a few cities in England and Ireland, came out of my "comfort zone" quite far and ... I found it exciting.

So I decided to go on a second trip beginning 2015, to England again. There I met a few people who were travelling unconventionally, sleeping rough, living in squats and alike. They introduced me a little bit to this lifestyle I only had read before about (here and on other sites).

And that did it. I remember sitting on a bench alone in Bristol, drinking a cider and seriously thinking about calling my family and the company I used to work for, telling them that I will stay in UK, not coming back to normal life. Well, that was only for 20 minutes, of course I came back. It was just a very unreasonable idea.

But I could not forget about this life and I got more and more depressed doing my 9-5 job. I tried to combine working and travelling, but that failed miserably.

So in November 2015 I quit my job and decided to just live an alternative life.

I don't know if that was a good decision, but I know I had the best time in my (adult) life the last two years. So probably yes. 

A friend of mine once told me "perhaps you had it always in you, but never lived it" ... and I think she is right.


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## todd (Mar 27, 2017)

its been a long painful process...lol


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## Whereamiwhatdoido (Mar 27, 2017)

I've kinda always been the odd one out. At 19 I went out into the world and ended up on a 3 month LSD trip which really took me over the hills, then later I joined a cult for 2½ years, and then now I am back where I came from trying to fit in, which is slowly killing me inside out, but still trying though.


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## somn (Mar 27, 2017)

what the fuck is normal? I've never talked to anyone who believes that they are living to conform to the masses. I have however met alot of people (including myself at times) calling everyone but themselves sheeple. That seems like some hipster bullshit to me. When we are children we can be really exclusive of eachother for stupid reasons, and that can be hard so I'm not trying to hate on anyone who shared their stories here. 

The next yuppie you see could actually be a stealthy hobo ninja living out of their tiny half empty backpack, doing a way better job than you at not drawing attention. you don't know.


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## EphemeralStick (Mar 27, 2017)

Hoo boy, where do I start? I guess the shortest answer is that I have never in my life felt that I was normal. As young kid I was extremely effeminate which did wonders on isolating me from most of my peers. As I got older I would find that as long as I kept myself emotionally distant from the people around me I could fit in, so to speak, with damn near any crowd of people.

I've always known that I wasn't meant to be like everyone else. That there was something a little bit off about me. My head was always in the clouds, dreaming of adventure and exploration. As I grew older I learned what it meant to have wanderlust and would eventually head out in to the big scary world. 

It's been difficult. Not only was I the only queer member of my family but I also developed some fairly radical ideologies that my more "normal" siblings couldn't understand. It was almost like having to come out a second time, once for my sexuality/gender identity, and then again for my nomadic life choices. I don't think there was ever any "aha" moment but instead a gradual acceptance that this is me.

This is who I am.
And that is just fine.


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## N0MAD (Mar 27, 2017)

freegander said:


> was it a long, painful process of trying to fit in or have you always known?
> 
> bonus: do you think anyone really is "normal"? does their inner soul truly resonate with social norms, or have they just conformed?


 For me it was high school i was constantly bullied for the smallest most stupidest thing;
My lisp and stutter - which only comes out when im stresses and being bullied and in highschool really contributed to my stress level.
The fact i cared for other people and wouldn't look down on anyone no matter what there predicament was. 

And a few other things but there pretty irrelevant.


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## deleted user (Mar 27, 2017)

freegander said:


> that is the struggle of my life. i lived in an anarchist community for a bit last summer, and i feel that i really got a sense of who i was apart from societal pressures. sometimes i just think i was subject to _different_ societal pressures, but the community valued independence so highly that i didn't feel pressured to be anything. it felt very much like being in solitude amongst a crowd.
> 
> i guess i've been hearing rumors that i wasn't normal my whole life, but i only chose to listen to that voice when i felt a sense of belonging in a community of _really strange_ people.



So, let me make sure I am understanding this right : when you were with these folks in the community, you felt yourself? And if you did, what do you think yourself is?

The idea of molding rings true to me, because it is something I found I do often. Luckily, I treat it more like a skill and less like an identity. I find molding myself to people can be useful for small periods of time, to enjoy company I might not otherwise enjoy, but it's always things that I must cut out of my life fairly quickly. (mostly people I meet on the road for a couple of days, or 5 minutes, or whatever)


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## awkwardshelby (Mar 27, 2017)

Haha honestly, I probably realized I wasn't normal when I was in elementary school and every one thought I was a boy and kids started making fun of me for having weird clothes and skateboarding and drawing weird shit all of the time. But thankfully I didn't care and I didn't conform to all of the standards kids put on me in school. 

God, I couldn't imagine living a standard, boring life.


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## iflewoverthecuckoosnest (Mar 27, 2017)

Middle school is when I started to come to terms with it. I tried and tried, but somehow I could never be "normal". I spent decent chunks of my childhood without any friends. 

I finally started to embrace the weird as I went through high school, and started making more friends (who were also misifts).

I still tried to do the whole college/job/drone in the hive thing when I hit adulthood. I really didn't know that there was much of another option. I did know that I was inherently dissatisfied, though. _Something_ was missing. _Something_ always had been.

I started befriending more folks on a similar rhythm as I was, and found out about all kinds of possibilities I never considered before.

I dipped my toes in the water by working on a few communes and hanging out with some crusty kids. Then the river sucked me in and I've been doing exactly what my heart wants for well over a year now, I estimate.

I could never go back. That something isn't missing anymore. 

I think a lot of people are oddballs trapped in yuppie costumes. I think a lot of people are needlessly sad with their lives. Maybe they don't realize there are other options, or maybe they are afraid to take the leap (I remember being terrified when I went in to give my two weeks), or perhaps they are tied down by obligations. 

Who knows? All I know is that I'm not one of them anymore.


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## Fatboy (Mar 27, 2017)

Since finding STP I realize that, there are many more people like me. It sucks that I did not know this until 42....better late than never I guess.


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## Benji91 (Mar 27, 2017)

What is normal...I guess normal is just what's common.

I've always been an outsider, the weird kid from kindergarten onwards. The kid who preferred to read in school, the 13 year old who wished he had an injury (broken bone or the like) just to feel some love, the teenager who snuck off at lunch for a cheeky beer on his own in highschool, the 17 year old who used to rock up to parties in drag. The kid who was always on the fringes of a social group, on the edge of acceptance. But, aside from the negatives, I was me - I can't and wouldn't try to be anyone else.

Now I'm the 20-something year old who tries to balance too many conflicting passions - music, travel, BDSM, activism, football (soccer, AFL, NFL), nature, hiking, reading, writing - which all end up clashing. 
The 25 year old who struggles to manage to maintain a happy life after a string of miserable/abusive pseudo-relationships, physical assaults, close friends dying and rape. I'm constantly searching for others with similar experiences to talk to (in person, that is...there are some things that). 

I've found like minded people, but never groups. As a laugh I used to say I was too queer for the punk scene, too _punk_ for the queer scene...but the more I think about it, I've never felt "normal" or even accepted in a group.

Fuck normal, I'm me.
It'd just be nice to have a strong support network sometimes.

Everyday I feel I come closer to the realisation that I'm destined to live something of a lone wolf life, I'm just not sure how I feel about that. Life is the road, or it will be soon enough. 

_...wow, didn't mean to spill so much or get at all deep, sorry if any of that was unwanted or unneeded. I may delete this later on, insecurity is a bitch. _


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## Deleted member 16034 (Mar 27, 2017)

I don't think I ever had a time in my life where I was considered "normal." I knew it, everyone around me knew it. Hell, my imaginary friends fucking knew it.

I did try to fit in a lot at school, I talked to all the "popular" kids. I befriended people who literally left me at a dude's house after I got drugged. I did drugs I didn't even fucking like. The amount of shit I was willing to do just to feel like I belonged somewhere was really over the top. I think once I hit my twenties I realized that as long as I'm not mentally or physically hurting anybody it really doesn't matter what other people think of me.


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## iflewoverthecuckoosnest (Mar 27, 2017)

Benji91 said:


> What is normal...I guess normal is just what's common.
> 
> I've always been an outsider, the weird kid from kindergarten onwards. The kid who preferred to read in school. [/I]




I can relate to that bit in particular. I was always digging into some Robert Louis Stevenson adventure novel or reading macabre books about romantic poets like Mary Shelly. 

Other kids thought I was so weird for reading and writing all the time, but I loved books and I still do. 

Even when I'm hitching around I've always got some tattered Steinbeck or Tom Robbins novel in my pack.


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## Coywolf (Mar 28, 2017)

Well I guess it all started when I went to my First adult film actor interview.....you should have seen the look on that guys face after I stripped down......::fuckinginbed::

But for real, I think the moment I first got the balls to throw on a backpack and start hitchhiking, something changed in me.

I can't really explain it, I mean, I had always been a skateboarder/stoner/wanna-be-anarchist in High School, but traveling made me find my inner peace. And that, to a lot of people I know, was not "normal".

I am currently having a bit of a mid life....something. I mean, I work for the government, so I can't really be any MORE of a son of "The Man". But my views on politics/society/living are forcing me to rethink my purpose here on Earth.

The second I got to my job this summer (which I was super excited about) I immediately missed being on the road, ecspecially because it is almost summer, and now i'm stuck with a job for the next 6 months. I love my job, but I also love being a tramp, and the two conflict, ridiculously.

Anyway. That brings me to my next point. I'm not very weird, or a punk, or have anything to prove, really. But I am definitely not normal. (As in the American dream wife/kids/college/debt/work/stress/then die kind of normal)

I think it was said best here: v



somn said:


> The next yuppie you see could actually be a stealthy hobo ninja living out of their tiny half empty backpack, doing a way better job than you at not drawing attention. you don't know.


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## freegander (Mar 28, 2017)

somn said:


> what the fuck is normal? I've never talked to anyone who believes that they are living to conform to the masses. I have however met alot of people (including myself at times) calling everyone but themselves sheeple. That seems like some hipster bullshit to me.
> 
> The next yuppie you see could actually be a stealthy hobo ninja living out of their tiny half empty backpack, doing a way better job than you at not drawing attention. you don't know.



i have met many people who believe that conforming is a good thing, at least to a much larger extent than i am comfortable with. 

but you make a good point. i think there is a kind of judgmental attitude that roots itself in people who think they are anti-conformist and it becomes very easy to dismiss the humanity of the other; the sheeple, like you said. 



moonwalker said:


> So, let me make sure I am understanding this right : when you were with these folks in the community, you felt yourself? And if you did, what do you think yourself is?
> 
> The idea of molding rings true to me, because it is something I found I do often. Luckily, I treat it more like a skill and less like an identity. I find molding myself to people can be useful for small periods of time, to enjoy company I might not otherwise enjoy, but it's always things that I must cut out of my life fairly quickly. (mostly people I meet on the road for a couple of days, or 5 minutes, or whatever)



it was more of a feeling, not a thought. 
but if i try to put it into words: for the first time, i really divorced myself from the forces of society, the patriarchy, capitalism, and religion. i stopped defining myself by my accomplishments, intelligence, or anything else that normally makes me feel special. in fact, i had to stop finding any solace in my "uniqueness" or anti-conformity. the people i was living with were waaaay beyond me in these things. i believe truly feeling that you are not unique is a huge step in a person's development. it certainly was painful. 
i had to stop comparing myself to others and just let myself be. 

"what do you think yourself is?" you're asking the classic question: "who am i?" 
i can't put it into words. i can't teach it to others. but i know what it feels like. it's like muscle memory, i can now realize when i'm not myself and when i am. and everyday i'm getting better at learning what sort of things feed me and what drains me.


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## Peace (Mar 28, 2017)

you know that hobo song that says " i remember grade school, and starting to notice that i was the only kid sitting alone. i remember high school, and starting to notice that not much had changed since i was six years old." 

That's a pretty good description. I don't view myself as "not normal", but I've definitively never fit in anywhere (school, jobs, with any group of people). Never had more than 1 or 2 friends going back to when I was a child. I dont know, maybe I'm just crazy and don't realize it.


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## Benji91 (Mar 28, 2017)

Peace said:


> you know that hobo song that says " i remember grade school, and starting to notice that i was the only kid sitting alone. i remember high school, and starting to notice that not much had changed since i was six years old."



Ahh Johnny Hobo, those words hit me pretty hard too.


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## N0MAD (Mar 28, 2017)

Peace said:


> you know that hobo song that says " i remember grade school, and starting to notice that i was the only kid sitting alone. i remember high school, and starting to notice that not much had changed since i was six years old."
> 
> That's a pretty good description. I don't view myself as "not normal", but I've definitively never fit in anywhere (school, jobs, with any group of people). Never had more than 1 or 2 friends going back to when I was a child. I dont know, maybe I'm just crazy and don't realize it.




The Top part is very much how i felt, i'd have to try extra hard to get someone to atleast acknowledge me. After a while i just stopped trying and ended up with a couple of friends which i still eventually lost contact with,


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## TheWindAndRain (Apr 1, 2017)

It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.


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## marmar (Apr 1, 2017)

Always knew I was normal and the world is crazy. There are very few normals out here, the rest are human machines. They resent normals.


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## Rob Nothing (Apr 1, 2017)

Peace love and prosperity to all and to all a good night


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## otch0z (Apr 11, 2017)

My name is Alice and I feel like I was doomed to be weird and somehow insane
In primary school, kids didn't like me, neither after that but then I had a pack of people that weren't liked by most of the kids so it was alright
I always felt "not part of it" but i think it is because of personal stuff (my birth wasn't a piece of cake and apparently that leaves traces so that made me "eclectic", said the doctor who helped my mother giving me birth and not dying while doing it)

But speaking of normality, I've just lived something interesting for this discussion (I think)
I've recently moved to Montréal, Canada, after traveling for a few months in the US. Being originally from france, it was interesting to see that I kinda changed because the main counter-culture changed too, and so did my group of friends etc 
See, in France you'll find your "crust punks" (or whatever seems closer to me) in raves in the forest (the movement is huge where i come from). I might get a lot of shit for saying that but errr... punk (music) is kinda dead in france, nowadays people actually have strikes to enforce the techno movement. 
Anyway. I somehow met some friends in Montréal, that are more part of y'all counter culture (if i really shorten things, acoustic music) and my tastes in music, style etc changed. (actually i got back to my 13yo self which is funny) 

So yeah i just conformed to another non-conform subculture
And isn't what we're all doing ?


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## Ori (Apr 11, 2017)

I always tried to fit in middle school and high school.. pretending to like things I really didn't and talked to kids that were popular, thinking it gave me some superiority in life. I did this for a while.. 

It was when I turned like 21 or 22 and decided to hit the road with just a bag and indulge in my true self and I realised it didn't matter what others thought of me, I became happy with myself, and met others like _my _true self and it brought true connections in my life with people.

Now I feel superior to those 'popular' kids in life, they're just a sheep, conforming to society..


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## Grubblin (Jun 14, 2017)

Is birth too early? If not, then birth! Another great question would be 'when did you realize that not being normal was better than normal', but that's another thread.


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## haylee (Jun 15, 2017)

moonwalker said:


> I had never thought of it as being not normal, but all of my life I have stayed very true to my own principles; whereas most people rely on what everyone else thinks or does, I go based off of what I feel myself and think myself. Fortunately or unfortunately, it's always been odd or unique in my case.
> 
> As for my friends, I have had some friends that have steered away from the "norm", but they really just deviated into what I call an "alt norm", which is pretty much just a culture that, although different than the norm, really perpetuates the same kind of "herding". I mean, I respect these people a lot, but I can see that they are, at times, no different than normal people, only that the guidelines they follow are a deviant of the norm. But, that's just my analysis of it. When you study human nature, you realize that there aren't really too many different kinds of people, only different backgrounds.
> 
> ...



Yo I'm an infp!


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## Ori (Jun 15, 2017)

NutSac said:


> every time i'm on the subway, or at a bookstore, or coffeeshop, and see very possibly cool or interesting looking people, but theyre all fucking with smartphones, I'm reminded that I'm not one of them. Is all it takes a smartphone or other portable entertainment object? Bars are supposed to be social centers- but many if not most are noisy and stress inducing. Dining is supposed to be social and relaxing-it cant be if theres loud Nikki Minaj or Bruno Mars or Maroon 5 playing at 110 decibels....
> People need to write long letters in cursive.
> People need to burn their tv's and tablets and smartphones.
> Pop culture needs to emulate me: I shall never emulate it.
> ...



I swear people are scared of human interaction these days.. Hiding behind their cellphones. If you try and talk to people they get so weirded out! Everyone is living in these alternate universe via their cellphones. None of that shit is real, it's all an illusion.. All those likes on Instagram, etc.. it does not compare to human interaction


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## CricketsChirping (Jun 15, 2017)

Ori Kom Trashkru said:


> I swear people are scared of human interaction these days.. Hiding behind their cellphones. If you try and talk to people they get so weirded out! Everyone is living in these alternate universe via their cellphones. None of that shit is real, it's all an illusion.. All those likes on Instagram, etc.. it does not compare to human interaction



Say net neutrality evolves and we lose our information super highway. What happens to all the time you spent liking stupid meme's and starting dumb crap on a dump post? You wanna "Like" something with meaning and not risk losing it at the pull of a cord? Okay then go carve out the like symbol somewhere in nature and start a manhunt to get others to find it and like it too..


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## kecleon (Jun 15, 2017)

School. Before school I never knew it was a thing not to be normal and everyone around me was wacky anyway so my version of normal was completely unnormal.

At school if you don't fit in you don't just feel it you're told it, excluded for it and made fun of for it.

I don't think anyone's normal really. We all have some things in common that are the real normal but the rest is manipulated into us and we're tricked into behaviors. What people call normal is just choosing to conform and not let people learn the real you.


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## haylee (Jun 17, 2017)

NutSac said:


> mew two


That's awesome. Too strange too live to rare to die!


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## The Hiker (Aug 16, 2017)

When I was grade school age, I was bullied by most of the other kids in my neighborhood. All that time I was always trying to fit in and be part of the group, but for reasons I don't know, I was never accepted by them. In 6th grade I moved away across the state, and there weren't as many bullys in my new middle school. The change of perspective gave me some insights, and I ended up with an important understanding (for me anyway) which is that for various reasons, and our brainwashing culture, I'm probably going to be judged by most "normal" people that I meet, and if that's the case then I may as well say fuck their opinions and do whatever I want!

So I started doing that, and just exploring different interests, and at this point in 11th grade, I can proudly say that in school and real life, I am very obviously weird, crazy, but most importantly, I don't give a fuck that that's what all the plastic people think.


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## rooster831 (Aug 27, 2017)

I guess I always knew it just never occurred to me that I should go with it instead of trying to someone I'm not i.e. everyone else


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## FromNowhere (Aug 27, 2017)

Great topic for discussion! My childhood was unusual. As a kid I spent a lot of time with hustlers, degenerates, gangs, etc. I turned out pretty darn good considering, but I have that degenerate streak and sometimes use it to my advantage against normies when I'm in the mood. Nothing too terrible though. I guess by the time I was in high school I realized I wasn't like most people. I've been going my own way since then. From time to time I get caught thinking I can be like others and fit in, etc. In certain ways I can, but in other ways my worldview just doesn't line up like most people.


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## JanKrusz (Nov 28, 2017)

When i tried commit suicide . It sounds awful but it gave one thing to think about. WHY DO I FEEL SO SHITTY ? Then my crusty friend took me for a hitchiking trough Poland . It gave me new idea for life . Helped me crawl out from depression . Some people just need freedom to live . Im one of them.


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## Juno Moon (Dec 1, 2017)

I never really fit in, but didn't think I was abnormal in a good or bad way either. I thought I was just missing some thing that everyone else seemed to naturally have and as a much younger child, this didn't bother me. As I entered the later grades of elementary school and middle school, I realized that wasn't acceptable. Other students and even teachers kept pressuring me to be different. I was forced to make friends and wasn't allowed to observe like I usually did. I tried very, very hard to fit in from this point on. I wasn't happy and just thought that was life. Interacting with people I didn't relate to and doing things I didn't enjoy.. Just life as a whole. 

By Junior High, I was very depressed then I met my first non conformant friend. He was sitting in science class wearing a attention grabbing tie dye shirt in a sea of Hollister and American Eagle and he just seemed so happy. Like unnaturally happy. I was instantly hooked on his energy. We became inseparable and he showed me a whole new way of life. He wasn't a traveler or anything but he viewed life differently than anyone else I had ever met. He did what he did to be happy, not to please others, not to appear normal, his goal was happiness and that really let me come out of the mold I was trying so hard to fit in. He showed me that happy and normal were not always compatible and I'm forever grateful for that lesson. That was 10+ years ago and I haven't looked back since!


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## FromNowhere (Dec 1, 2017)

An absent father and a Zen Master walk into a bar...


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## Deleted member 20240 (Dec 4, 2017)

Always been different. Conformity feels inherently wrong. Were all unique, but trained to conform from the start so were controllable cattle. Our societal systems were created for this purpose, so that the few in power could maintain dominion for thier own personal gain. If thier not getting anything out of you, your cast aside. Hence why the poor are treated so shitty and revolutionaries always end up dead.


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## FromNowhere (Dec 4, 2017)

I've recently


wISDOM said:


> Always been different. Conformity feels inherently wrong. Were all unique, but trained to conform from the start so were controllable cattle. Our societal systems were created for this purpose, so that the few in power could maintain dominion for thier own personal gain. If thier not getting anything out of you, your cast aside. Hence why the poor are treated so shitty and revolutionaries always end up dead.



I understand where you are coming from. There's lots of power games going on in the world. Having said that, I've recently changed my worldview in this regard. I read a book not too long ago that hit really close to home and forced me to take a painfully honest look at myself. I would be bullshitting myself if I said I'm a different person now, but I can honestly admit to myself now, that my view of the world was warped primarily by my terrible upbringing. My parents didn't have the understanding at the time, nor do they even have it to this day, so I can't blame them. It sure would have been great if I had learned some of these valuable lessons from emotionally mature adults when I was younger, instead of feeling like I'm having to play catch up now that I am older. I guess too many people go their entire lives not learning enough about themselves to really feel they are worthy enough to make a difference in the world at all. So I am thankful for suffering less and feeling like I finally have a purpose in the world instead of just drifting around, lost at sea.

If anybody cares, the book is called No More Mr. Nice Guy from Dr. Robert Glover. As a man, this book has been an incredible eye opener for me. Again, I'm not a different person. But I realize what I have been missing out on and I am optimistic about finally finding a purpose and going through life with real confidence and belief in myself instead of pointing the finger at others and feeling sorry for myself. Please understand that I am only talking about myself here. I'm not making any sweeping judgements about anyone in the post. Hell, we don't even know each other, so I really couldn't do that anyway. However, I do suspect that some guys on STP could benefit from this information should they feel they need to change something about themselves, but maybe can't quite put a finger on it.


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## creature (Dec 4, 2017)

Right about when I discovered most other people were assholes..

Kindergarten or thereabouts?


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## Deleted member 20240 (Dec 4, 2017)

Im not saying that our lives are someting that's beyond our control, But the fact still remains that what I stated is true. Any common knoledge of history proves it as so. Where I am right now, what direction I go, are my choices. The fact that I choose is what makes me different.


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## Deleted member 20240 (Dec 4, 2017)

No animosity whosoever.


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## Deleted member 20240 (Dec 4, 2017)

Jesus, I hate typos.


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## FromNowhere (Dec 4, 2017)

wISDOM said:


> Im not saying that our lives are someting that's beyond our control, But the fact still remains that what I stated is true. Any common knoledge of history proves it as so. Where I am right now, what direction I go, are my choices. The fact that I choose is what makes me different.


I agree. There are people with a purpose, and then there are people who have no purpose of their own and instead fulfill the purpose of others. Just because there are people with nefarious purposes in the world doesn't mean I can't pursue a purpose which is contrary to those people, regardless of how powerful they are. I could throw my hands up and say those people are too powerful, they control the schools, the media, and there is nothing I can do. Or I can make a conscious choice to define my own purpose in life and focus on what I can do to build myself and others up, or I can difuse my power by worrying about the misguided and controlling efforts of others. Personally I don't have time to do both.


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## Hobo Mud (Dec 8, 2017)

I don't think there is such a thing as normal. The only difference is that some people are able to hide there character defects better than others. What some might define as flaws or character defects might might be admirable to others. Safe travel's friend.


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## Deleted member 19100 (Feb 22, 2018)

After reading a book on introversion about 7 years ago. 
Up until that point I hated myself because I thought there was something "wrong" with me. What seemed to be everyone else around me enjoying shit like going out to clubs, cold approaching women, enjoying the spotlight, having superficial conversations about crap on tv and doing it all for hours on end. I was always looking for a fix to my non-existant problem.
Realizing that my brain works pretty well opposite of what I had been trying to conform to was... fucking earthshattering!
So yeah, I'm not normal and goddamn happy to be aware that! Woot!


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## roughdraft (Mar 19, 2018)

good topic...lets see my alcoholic dad told me that i was crazy a lot when i was a child so i believed him...and in social situations like school etc..always seemed to have gotten more extreme reactions from people than anything anywhere in the middle...so oscillating between bullying and harassment to extremely warm welcoming and sincere interest with compliments about the way i think and put things together....seems like a lot of people often had something to say to me or about me that was as positive or as negative as you can imagine...so i have a long history of continuously realizing that i am "different"


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## SammyDmn27 (Mar 25, 2018)

I used to believe in normal, but after almost dying from a drug overdose and getting off the bullshit pills that doctors forced on me because I'm diagnosed labeled or whatever as "bipolar autistic", I realized that there's no such thing as "normal". It's just a bunch of make believe fairytale bullshit created by people afraid to embrace individuality or the fact that everyone is different in some way, shape, or form. I've never been normal, I never will be, and I don't give a damn. If "normal" people don't have even the slightest will to be weird, then they're not worth your time. I'm not perfect, either, but I'm willing to admit my flaws, mistakes, and fuck ups and evolve along the way.


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## Koala (Jul 31, 2018)

Nothing really particular stood out to me growing up, I guess....
I'm still in a mentality that I can get along with pretty much anyone and that everyone can come together in some way, shape or form...but I was proven wrong when I moved into an apartment with 3 random chicks this past year at college. They seemed chill enough, but then this thing happened that made me realize just how different we were.

There's a town in Australia called Rockhampton that's the Beef Capital of Australia. They have 6 or 7 bull statues around town, complete with the horns and the balls and everything. Now a favorite pasttime of folks in Rockhampton was to saw off and steal the giant balls off of these giant bull statues. And so the city had to go around and replace the balls and reinforce them with metal beams! I thought, that's freaking hilarious! So while I was there, I climbed one of the statues with someone I was hanging with from Tinder.







And I even got a close up of the balls! On film!






So flash to the apartment in Miami...one night we were hanging around talking about different kinds of animals, when the difference between bulls and cows came up. I ran into my room to retreive the bull ball photo and came back to tell the story of Rockhampton! Everyone kind of laughed and then the conversation went elsewhere. Oh well.

I put the bull ball photo on the coffee table as an interesting centerpiece and eventually we all disbanded and went to bed.

When I woke up in the morning, the bull ball photo was FLIPPED OVER. Someone had been SO OFFENDED by the photo of BALLS ON A STATUE OF A BULL that they FLIPPED IT OVER. That's when I realized....just how different we were.....and I realized _there really are two types of people in the world....those who would flip over a picture of bull balls and those who would frame the photo and hang it for all to see. And I was living in the former....................._


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## LennyLeather (Jul 31, 2018)

Always had a sneaking suspicion, but it never really clicked in my head until I started curling the points of my goatee


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