# I need advice...ASAP



## AnarchistRon

Or at least in 36 hours.

I've been chatting with this girl who has......stolen my MIND...ever since I've met her...I haven't been able to think about anything else. Anyways, she was giving off great vibes and I thought she liked me...so I asked her out for a cup of coffee and she laughed and smiled and said I'm really busy, have to work, study, etc. etc. And....obviously I feel like shit now...I've felt like shit for many months even before I met her, I was hoping that I would stand some chance with her, it would turn my life right side up...

Anyways, I'm wondering whether all hope is lost with her or whether I could somehow still be friends with her...I sent the following facebook post:


> i feel like a total idiot for asking you out...again. i'm not apologizing, but i feel like an idiot
> 
> 
> 
> 
> you know,  i really thought i was receiving good vibes, but clearly you were just being friendly. i hope we're still cool and that i don't come off as a creep or anything


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## Beegod Santana

If she "likes" your fb post then ya'll are obviously meant to be together forever. If not, all hope is lost.

Or you could just grow a pair and talk to her about it in person.


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## TheUndeadPhoenix

^this
People will think you're a creep more ofter then not on facebook. No matter WHAT you're talking about. You can fuckin upload a picture of a lolcat and there's always some asshole that's gonna say YOU'RE A CREEPER!


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## Alaska

Yeah, you shouldn't have done that. The FB post, I mean.

Just do what I do when I drunkenly hit on someone on that damn website: Ignore them until they talk to you first. It makes the shame easier to digest.


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## whaleofashrimp

b prepaired to be let down..but try to meet up with her as friends..see what happens from there..if she wont then she just thinks your a rapeist make her feel comfterbal..what kind of moron gets intense with a girl on the net?


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## AnarchistRon

yeah...i totally fucked up. she hasn't replied to that post, it's been 8 hours. It's fine, i'll just kill myself


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## whaleofashrimp

bitchs aint worth it man


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## Beegod Santana

AnarchistRon said:


> yeah...i totally fucked up. she hasn't replied to that post, it's been 8 hours. It's fine, i'll just kill myself



Don't forget to post "FML!!! I'll never find true love!" right before you do...

I know most of you "Anarchist" FB users tend to diss on porn, but ya know, porn helps.


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## whaleofashrimp

u will be an hero


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## AnarchistRon

Beegod Santana said:


> Don't forget to post "FML!!! I'll never find true love!" right before you do...
> 
> I know most of you "Anarchist" FB users tend to diss on porn, but ya know, porn helps.



After about a decade, it gets old...and you inevitably come to discover that there's a whole fucking world out there waiting to be experienced, the smallest cell of which is not the female counterpart. I have lost my prime years to pornography and video games...i do not wish to continue living in this manner.

Unlike my anarchist colleagues, i don't think porn exploits or degrades females, if they are consciously making the decision to place themselves in that condition. All things are tolerable in modest quantities...


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## whaleofashrimp

the reason your anarchist friends say it degrades women is because there trying to get laid and are starting to belive there own bs..dude i did a shoot for a gay porn rag..jerked off in front of a camera for 100 bucks..i didnt feel exploted or degraded


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## Pheonix

AnarchistRon said:


> After about a decade, it gets old...and you inevitably come to discover that there's a whole fucking world out there waiting to be experienced, the smallest cell of which is not the female counterpart. I have lost my prime years to pornography and video games...i do not wish to continue living in this manner.
> 
> Unlike my anarchist colleagues, i don't think porn exploits or degrades females, if they are consciously making the decision to place themselves in that condition. All things are tolerable in modest quantities...



I'll take porn and video games over suicide any day.


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## slurricane

lol dude she's probably shy
don't give up your game
get it


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## whaleofashrimp

imaybe its like my father used to say.."no is a shy yes"


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## wizehop

DUDE you are way looking to fucking much into things... chill out! although if anything killed you its the apologizing for asking her out...cut that shit out..if you want to hang with her dont be sorry about it and dont fucking worry if shes not standing by her phone..good things take time, dont expect so much right off the bat.

And porn is good because its degrading..fuck it Im going to rub one off right now to some vulnerable chick getting gang fucked before bed


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## AnarchistRon

Well thanks for the reassurance but....She really doesn't seem like the shy type...although she did seem shy at that instant with the chuckling and smiling but...fuck it...i'll just chat with her a little bit on thursday see how things go...act natural, as though nothing happened. I probably just scare her...


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## whaleofashrimp

it was a rape joke...move on..start ignoring her..bitchs love that


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## Rancho

Why are we even talking about this?


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## whaleofashrimp

brotha needed a new pov..wed do the same for you


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## Earth

Why not, got a problem with it?
Aint nothing wrong with the brother looking for advice..


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## Beegod Santana

Rancho said:


> Why are we even talking about this?



Cause I'm bored as shit in Nevada and my lady friend is three big states away.

Ya'll can thank me later for turning this from a thread asking for relationship advice into a discussion on the merits of jacking off in front of computer screens / cameras.

Cause that's how I roll.


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## whaleofashrimp

nevada...now theres your problem


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## Pheonix

AnarchistRon said:


> Well thanks for the reassurance but....She really doesn't seem like the shy type...although she did seem shy at that instant with the chuckling and smiling but...fuck it...i'll just chat with her a little bit on thursday see how things go...act natural, as though nothing happened. I probably just scare her...



she's not the shy type but she was shy at that instance.

dude, man... she wants you to be more assertive.


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## Earth

I suppose I should say something here, and against my better judgement I shall.

About 2 years ago, now... I was in the midst of an intense relationship with a woman I met at the plant who moved here from outta state.
I decided upon seeing her 1 year previous to this that I needed her to be mine.
Crazy, huh??
I was going through the exact same thing you are.
Then, it clicked when I least expected, and man it was great.
(for about 3 months, maybe 4...)
Afterwards, I went through a period of maybe 3 months of purgatory followed by a solid year of hell.
Why??
Damn good question, which I still never figured out myself.....
I do know this:
She wanted complete freedom to do anything she saw fit to do, including leaving me - at any moments notice.
Now - I'm cool with that - but why jump a broom with someone you care less about??
So, I guess I kinda turned the heat up a little bit and 'encouraged' her to get the fuck out since that's all I ever heard her complaining about, the whole being trapped thing... Fine, get the fuck out.
Now, I am free - and happy.
AND I GOT THE DOG!!
WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER!! 

(opps, sorry....)

Ok - here's the deal.....

Rule 1: It is the fool who goes where the wise man runs away
Rule 2: Doing most of the giving (remember, relationships are about give and take) is ok BUT DON'T DO ALL !!
Rule 3: Never sell out, or sell yourself short either for that matter.
Rule 4: Never compromise who you are / what you are about either (I guess that's Rule 3 in a way...)

Fuck playing games - this shit between girls saying something but really meaning something else.
I'm a hard motherfucker and I take everything at face value.

Last but not least: You are a human being - always remember that - and there's nothing wrong with writing something emotional on-line about / to somebody you care about / for... and if they / somebody's got a problem with that, then tell them they can go fuck off!!

God Be With You...........................


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## slurricane

i thought youd never met this girl..so what exactly would be a smile and a chuckle?


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## AnarchistRon

I should probably have given more detail...we go to the same class. afterward i just approached her, asked her whether she'd recieved her notes from the teacher, because she was absent the day before (i had initially planned to offer the notes to her if the teacher said no), she said that she had, and so i said something along the lines of: i was wondering would you be interested in having a cup of coffee with me sometime... to which she chuckled, smiled and said she was very busy with work and studying, and she concluded it with i'm sorry. I then said its fine, i'll see you on thursday and walked off.


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## Pheonix

yea, you probably still had a chance until you apologized.
real men don't apologize for being men.


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## CXR1037

When I look at what the Internet has done to my generation it makes me want to cry.

cxr - disconnected


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## AnarchistRon

if she really liked me that wouldn't matter so much and she would probably have said yes initially. I mean...this woman is really stunning and very sociable...she's probably approached by many men.


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## scatwomb

I dunno Ron, if she laughed at you when you asked her out, that's not a good sign. In fact, something like that indicates arrogance and carelessness on her part, not something I would personally look for in a partner. Or, SHE JUST DOESN'T WANT TO GO OUT WITH YOU - get over it.

When I was in college, I would get tons of "dates" by just asking questions about the class or notes to girls I had crushes on and would say "well, I'll be studying at so-and-so place with a friend, if you wanna come along." Sometimes girls said "no, that's cool" and other times we studied together and it lead to _other things. _It's a passive strategy, but, I wasn't looking only to fuck them - I wanted to get to know them because they seemed interesting and/or cute or whatever.

But yeah, don't get all dramatic and shit if some girl doesn't want to get coffee with you. One will eventually, and you'll probably have loads and loads of degrading sex with her!


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## whaleofashrimp

u know what women hate/ a man who loves and cares about her feelings..treat her like shit..shell turn around


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## AnarchistRon

She didn't out right laugh...she chuckled and smiled unconsciously, it was obvious that it was not a forced or conceited laugh...i'm thinking about this too much again, but that's the sort of person I am....i think...a lot...not just about her, but in general.

i don't understand why people always interpret my writing as overly dramatic, i'm really not...it's just the way i write. I like this girl...more than i have ever liked any other...and would like to get to know more about her if possible.

this will sound perplexing to some and gay to others, but i don't give a rat's shit about the sex...she is nothing short of the most stunning woman i have set my eyes on...but i don't care about the sex right now. i just want someone to hold, someone with whom i can share my secrets and thoughts, someone who's mere presence will relieve me of all the burdens in life...someone i can worry about so that i won't have to worry about myself.


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## Pheonix

a giggle is not always a laugh it is sometimes a flirt, and what I got from the first part is not a "no" but a not right now. apologizing for a flirt or come-on is dumb, just continuing to talk about the turn down is a stupid thing to do. I think he would benefit from your passive strategy, scatwomb, but not if he 's going to be suicidal a wanna cut his wrist every time he gets rejected. I hate to say it but suicidal people shouldn't be in a relationship cause they never end well and always end with emotional baggage. he says he scared her with the facebook post but she ain't scared until they shack up and he threatens to kill himself if she leaves. I guess what I'm trying to say is suicidal people make bad partners, so good for her, she avoided a trainwreck by saying no.


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## whaleofashrimp

i hear ya man...but us kind senseative men..we fail at being our selves so we have to go out of our way and deuch it up to be taken seiously


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## TheUndeadPhoenix

Ron, what ever you do, do not get into the FRIEND ZONE.


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## AnarchistRon

xD I wasn't serious about the suicide...i should probably have said that..then again, i didn't expect anyone to take it seriously.


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## AnarchistRon

TheUndeadPhoenix said:


> Ron, what ever you do, do not get into the FRIEND ZONE.



I'd rather get into the friend zone, then lose her entirely.


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## scatwomb

AnarchistRon said:


> someone who's mere presence will relieve me of all the burdens in life...



Potential partners can sense this type of desperation. If any girl falls for it, she will also be pathetic in many ways. My advice is not to try and find happiness in another person, but, to be happy with yourself. Once that happiness and the calmness it facilitates comes, the ladies will start rolling in - think of all the bosoms you can cry on  You seem to suffer from some sort of clinical depression, so, I don't think it will be easy for you to attain happiness alone, I dunno.

Oh and, I don't think the way you write is dramatic, I think the way you seem to be acting is. I mean, shit, you said you were going to kill yourself (I assume you were joking) if she didn't reply to your Facebook post.

I still love you though. Anarchist solidarity and the like...


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## TheUndeadPhoenix

AnarchistRon said:


> I'd rather get into the friend zone, then lose her entirely.


Good point


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## scatwomb

AnarchistRon said:


> I'd rather get into the friend zone, then lose her entirely.



NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


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## whaleofashrimp

fuck bitchs,make money..buy whore


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## Pheonix

AnarchistRon said:


> I'd rather get into the friend zone, then lose her entirely.



she won't take you seriously as a friend she will think you just want to stick around in case she changes her mind. if she is a bitch (and there's alot out there) she will use your feelings for her to take advantage of you, but still never give it up. don't start buying her friend gifts.


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## AnarchistRon

i'll admit i've said a few awkward things around her that would make her conscious of the fact that i liked her....bah...i don't know...it's just difficult thinking about what could have been...and when i'll meet someone else this wonderful.

how can i possibly be happy with myself? i don't want to share my life story here...but if you knew anything about me...i don't have much in my life to make me happy.

and this has come to translate into the way i speak and write...(i'm really trying not to sound like an asshole here, i don't usually write like this) so it's very likely that she interpreted me as some gloomy mysterious fellow...whereas, if she would have just indulged me for 10 minutes over a cup of coffee, she would have granted me with sufficient joy, enough to reveal the true me, underneath all the grief i've been experiencing over the past few years.


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## scatwomb

AnarchistRon, you need to watch Richard Proenneke's and mimic his life. After you build your cabin in the Alaskan wilderness, you will be a flanneled burly badass with no feelings whatsoever - you won't give a fuck about how girls interpret your actions and you'll get so many ladies, you won't even know what's what.

Stop questioning what you're doing and what you did with this chick. Just. Stop. It.


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## AnarchistRon

YOU KNOW WHAT....I'm gonna ask her why the fuck she said no...i'm gonna do it...on thursday i'm going to approach her and ask her why she said no...then i'm going to convince her that it's all a load of bullshit and i'm the happiest gayiest motherfucker she's ever met...


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## scatwomb

AnarchistRon said:


> YOU KNOW WHAT....I'm gonna ask her why the fuck she said no...i'm gonna do it...on thursday i'm going to approach her and ask her why she said no...then i'm going to convince her that it's all a load of bullshit and i'm the happiest gayiest motherfucker she's ever met...



If you could have a friend film and post it on StP, that would be great.


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## Pheonix

AnarchistRon said:


> YOU KNOW WHAT....I'm gonna ask her why the fuck she said no...i'm gonna do it...on thursday i'm going to approach her and ask her why she said no...then i'm going to convince her that it's all a load of bullshit and i'm the happiest gayiest motherfucker she's ever met...



I wouldn't say "gayiest" and yes I would love to see that go down.

can we get a link to her facebook page?


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## AnarchistRon

her facebook page is private


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## Kim Chee

I hear women are turned on by confidence, I think you may have blown your chances. Grow a beard and forget about women anyway, they're really fun, but in the end just a waste of time.


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## AnarchistRon

that facebook message was a sign of weakness? i just wanted to make sure we were still cool together...i even stated in the post that i wasn't apologizing for asking her out...and i was pretty confident when i had asked her.


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## Pheonix

stating that it wasn't an apology makes it feel like an apology, and thus you will suffer any adverse effects the same as if you would have apologized. you apologized without apologizing witch sometimes is worse.

but it's ok, there's more fish in the sea, she wasn't the one, blah, blah, blah.....etc..


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## finn

My advice is to never mistake her curiousity for interest. Keep moving and don't stagnate, since this obsession really isn't going anywhere.


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## AnarchistRon

i don't know why i even created this thread....it has served only to confuse me further


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## CXR1037

My advice is to definitely maybe probably call her and maybe, just maybe talk to her and probably talk about things, insofar as to say perhaps bring up a point that there is veritable evidence perhaps pertaining to something, and, or, some junk.

cxr - wut


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## Pheonix

AnarchistRon said:


> i don't know why i even created this thread....it has served only to confuse me further



what were you expecting, you ruined your chances with the facebook post. we can't help you, you already messed up before you even asked us for advice. seriously what kind of advice do you want, the best advice I can give you is to go back in time and prevent yourself from making that facebook post. we can't help you with this girl, but we can tell you what you did wrong so you don't do it again. however you already knew what you did wrong and something tells me that you will end up making the same mistake in the future, and thus never really learn from your mistake.


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## scatwomb

Yeah man, the feedback we provide will _hopefully _prevent you from fucking up in the future.

Don't be so hard on yourself. You made _one_ mistake with _one_ girl - just learn from it and don't do it again. Although, I think pheonix is correct in saying that this may happen again, and, I have a feeling it has happened in the past.

You shouldn't expect to find happiness solely in a romantic partner. That is really fucking unfair to that person, and, it's completely irrational to think another person is going to eradicate all your loneliness and unhappiness. That type of thinking has led many (idiot) men to threaten suicide upon a breakup, or generally act like a pseudo-romantic douchebag whose whole world revolves around some pathetic girl - don't be that guy, AnarchistRon.

As an "anarchist", shouldn't you be rejecting this type of cultural brainwashing?


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## AnarchistRon

I spoke to her again, and she was perfectly fine...as though nothing happened...clearly she hasn't thought as much about it as we have. Turns out she had a boyfriend.


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## wartomods

AnarchistRon said:


> YOU KNOW WHAT....I'm gonna ask her why the fuck she said no...i'm gonna do it...on thursday i'm going to approach her and ask her why she said no...then i'm going to convince her that it's all a load of bullshit and i'm the happiest gayiest motherfucker she's ever met...


Thats the attitude, and if she says no again, slap the bitch in the face.


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## wartomods

oops slap the bitch in the face and say "Why do you have a boyfriend " She will drop her panties in two second


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## Danny Dissent

...and on to the next one.


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## veraladd

l


whaleofashrimp said:


> it was a rape joke...move on..start ignoring her..bitchs love that


aughing at this also wondering if you were referring to southern comfort in atl earlier.


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## c0dy

i wouldnt get all bent out of shape man, dont worry be happy


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## Tigers eye

Leave it be. Youll see her round in the usual places, strike up a coversation when its comfy.
youll be able to tell if she digs it or not. No rush. Dont know how old yar but smetimes theres sme baggage
fear trust issues. Mop. Take it easy if you really like her.
easy does it.


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## Tigers eye

P.s. your face book message snded fine to me.
your message is clear.
no more facebook messages.
jmo.
good luck


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## Shakou

A girl isn't going to be attracted to someone who beats themselves up over trying and failing. It was a brave move to ask her out, even if she wasn't interested. You should be proud of that. Lick you wounds and move on.


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## NM Black Cross Medic

As someone who is entering second semester of freshman college and has not had a steady relationship since grade 6, let me give you some advice:
Don't chase after women, just live your life, have fun with your friends. I made the same mistake for a very long time, I was always looking for a relationship, always disappointed when I didn't find one. Soon after I said "fuck it, I'll just start living" I was much happier person. So in short: let her know that you screwed up (in person) and tell her you'd rather start over. If she's not a bitch, she'll say okay and you'll resume being friends. If any part of her is interested in you, she'll probably give you a chance just for being honest and approaching her as a human being. If she says "fuck off", she's not worth associating with and you're better off walking away and forgetting about her.

Whatever happens, just keep living, and I don't mean survive, I mean LIVE.


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## whaleofashrimp

the gay porn rag/ southern cumfort..yes


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