# Psychosis on the Road



## 4t7 (Aug 9, 2015)

So...I have this friend who wants to go travelling. He's always talking about how bad be just wants to be on the road and how he'll never be able to, and doesn't want to, do the 9-5 thing day in day out. He's also always going on about how he plans on 'finding himself' on the road and how it's what he wants to do and needs to do. He says he's planning on hitting the road as soon as he gets some loose ends tied up and a little bit of cash from his few worldly possessions he's trying to sell. This all sounds well and good, right? 

Only problem here (that I can see at least) is that he is honestly kinda insane. I've witnessed him having several pyschotic breaks within the last 5 years. Honestly I'm a little worried about him doing this travel thing alone. The thing is he's incredibly smart and coherent when he's not manic or having an episode and he seems really passionate about traveling. He's also obviously been studying up on the lifestyle because he seems to know a great deal about it.

Anyways, to the point of my post...I'm looking for stories any of you guys and girls may have about crazy people on the road as well as stories about your personal experiences dealing with mental illness while travelling and any advice I can maybe pass on to my friend.

I know this can be a sensitive thing to talk about but I'd really appreciate some honest answers and feedback from anyone willing to share. No judgement shall be passed [emoji41]


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## CelticWanderer (Aug 9, 2015)

Ive got somethin' wrong with me, dunno what it is cause i can't afford a doctor. I would sometimes find entries in my journals that I swear i didnt write, or my shit would go missing and it was just me putting somewhere while i was out of my head. There are times where I go fucking insane and lose myself to emotions. I'd say if he's okay with meds to try and get some of those before he heads out, but then if you run out on the road it can really fuck with you.
dunno how he is, but i can usually tell when things are about to go bad for me, it's like you can feel it pushing on the fringes of your mind. Overall though i never had any serious problems out on the road, if I felt an episode coming on i would try and find a secluded spot to just let go and lose my mind. 
While it's a risk, I don't think you should stop him. You probably wouldn't be able to anyway. Maybe have a way to bail out, like a few hundred bucks for a greyhound back home or something if it gets too bad. 

I dunno man, with that kinda stuff you just gatta learn to roll with it.


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## erisiansnafu (Aug 9, 2015)

Traveling from my perspective can exacerbate all emotional conditions. Highs become mountains, and lows 
become canyons. Unless you have some semblance of emotional equanimity then it can be rough. The type of traveling that most of the folk on STP do is fraught with disorder, things will not go according to plan sometimes. Being willing to weather those moments, to have a looser sense of time is imperative to enjoying yourself. If your friend is unable to get his psychotic episodes under control while being in a somewhat stable environment then he certainly will not while on the road. The danger of him having a massive freak out and the consequences there of are far greater. For instance what happens if you are treated badly by a police officer for flying a sign. Folk from STP, from what I've seen will know to deescalate the situation as quickly as possible. Do what the cop says and move on. If your friend reacted badly to that things could go south real quick. I had a friend who went hitchiking without taking his medications for schizophrenia. It did not go well, he ended up being forcibly committed for months. Mental health is a deep and varied topic, it can touch on things many people are wary of. Being honest with your friend about how he plans to deal with his mental health, or if he even recognizes the psychosis is important.


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## landpirate (Aug 9, 2015)

great thread. I'm just going to move it to the staying healthy section seeing as it relates to mental health.


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## spectacular (Aug 9, 2015)

I'd say thats a lot of ppl on the road, he will be in good company... Maybe he's suited to living outdoors better.


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## erisiansnafu (Aug 9, 2015)

You could be right, that type of freedom might help him. Everyone's crazy in their own way.


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## spectacular (Aug 9, 2015)

I mean I've had my share of violent outbursts that scared ppl in my family and around me into calling the police and threatening me with institutionalization. Now that I've been out here for a while I'm still weird but also preoccupied with not being murdered and finding food. Donno how old your friend is. I'm 29. All the psycho shit happened when I was in my mid 20s. I've seen lots of guys and girls out here who start out being all out nutjobs and eventually are worn down to just garden variety wackos, harmless. That being said I've seen some people blow up and do something violent and end up in jail or the mental hospital.


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## Kim Chee (Aug 9, 2015)

There are a lot of free resources out there for people who are poor and need assistance with their mental health. 

If you feel like you can use a little help, it is there. If you send me a pm with the city you are in I'll look up the free resources available for you.

On topic:
There are plenty of people on the street with mental disorders, your friend has plenty of company. 

I've seen crazy.

Uhuh...it's ok.


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## landpirate (Aug 9, 2015)

I have been going through "something" in the last few months. I have the total desire to have absolutely no human interaction combined with a desperate need for being fully immersed in some kind of community situation. Basically I want to be on my own all the time but I know that it's a very bad idea because without outside input I will drown in my brains mess of paranoia, social anxiety and depression.

I have had to in the last few days return to my home town and to my childhood home to be essentially watched over by mother. to prevent me from doing anything stupid. Its not the greatest of situations and a lot of it has been brought on by how I have spent the last few years living my life. Its easy for us to slip through the net and let our health become not so important as we have stuff like getting water and shelter to think about.

I rubber tramp, mostly alone (except for my dog) it can be a really lonely existence and I think that it could exasperate any mental health issues somebody might have. It definitely has for me. However, It's also given me the opportunity to test exactly what I am made of and although I am currently broken I understand that I am stronger than I knew. 

this type of life does allow you to turn your back on many things that can stress a person out like making money and paying rent so in some ways it may reduce situations that would cause issues however it can just replace them with other problems.

I would also say that most people I meet on the road have addiction issues and that's not always the best to be around if your heads a bit of a mess. 

I think what I'm trying to say is, if its possible to be as sorted in the head as you can be before heading out, then that's the best situation as thing will only get weirder when you're travelling. I think everyone deserves the chance to try everything whether they are mad or not .


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## Mankini (Aug 10, 2015)

You gotta find or create community wherever you go. Travel is by its very nature isolating. There are people who are not isolated and stay in the community where they were born for their entire lives. Moving to a new community means finding a new social circle. After all, why do you think so many new members here are "looking for road dawgz''??!! They're F-in lonely!!!!

There is 'fun' insanity, that makes you climb trees, invade stuffy environments, etc...Then there is serious, real health problems: Anyone with something serious should get on Medicaid so they can access healthcare wherever they go.

I try to find a church wherever I go: also there are fraternal org's like the VFW, FNB, Masons, American Legion, Elks, Rotary, etc. Having a supportive group wherever you go is absolutely essential for mental health.


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## Peace (Aug 10, 2015)

I have panic disorder and I'm also a mental health counselor.I think traveling and mental health issues really depends on the person. For me personally, I find traveling to be relaxing- yes there are times when I have anxiety, but I'm able to get through them fine. On the other hand, I work with some clients who I know would not do well on the road. I think the best bet would be to find out his diagnosis (assuming he has one) and go from there. If you have any specific questions about what he may or may not have, feel free to PM me =]


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## erisiansnafu (Aug 10, 2015)

There are many skills and behaviors which can be incredibly useful to those who have anxiety, depression or various forms of social disorders. Meditation, Yoga, CBT, these are all skills that can help you find equanimity in life and on the road. There are also mental illnesses that cannot be treated by holistic means alone and must have a mixture of medication and therapy. @Peace you're right it depends on the person, some people have a good handle on their own mental state, others don't. Go to any big city and you will see the state of some peoples mental health reflected in skid row. It is not just the ability to travel that is important but the quality of travel. You can be homeless and still be incredibly happy, creative and spiritually healthy.The opposite is also true, you can be homeless miserable, anxious and spiritually deadened. For many the choice to travel is not a choice at all, people run from things, be they good or bad. Situations sometimes force those that have no voice into this lifestyle. If you have choices, if you have agency, then use that freedom to find equanimity through various holistic means and if need be psychiatric. I feel it can really be summed up simply. If your miserable in your current life but are generally a happy, creative and healthy person. Then go get out of your 9-5 fuck Capitalism and the suffering it inflicts upon the soul, go be free. If however you've been clinically depressed in your life, have had serious bouts of mental illness that have required or almost required institutionalization or severe medicating. Before you throw yourself to the whims of the road god find some inner balance. Life on the road and in any endeavor will be far more beautiful and joyful.


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## Parker Free (Aug 10, 2015)

I'm diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, Major Depressive Disorder and Anxiety. I'm on meds, and have been through years of therapy. I've been homeless, but haven't been on the road yet, although I'm preparing for it. I don't think I'd have gotten through all the trials I've had if not for the therapy/meds. The meds do the physical work of helping keep me stable. The therapy gave me skills to help me when I'm mentally unstable..to get back to a better place. Your friend probably has different issues, but without knowing what he's dealing with, he is at a huge disadvantage for dealing when his issues hit. You can't make him go to a doctor, but maybe you can suggest he does?

There's also the monetary aspect. Say he does go in and figures out what's up, and needs meds long-term. He's going to need money for them, and I agree with an earlier poster who suggested Medicare. That would take care of all of his health issues, not just the mental ones. To get on Medicare, he'll have to go to a doctor for an official diagnosis...so there's another reason to go be checked out.

I like people and I like being around people. But I feel the best and the most free (and stable) when I have the ability to go where I want, when I want. I am most comfortable when alone. I'm not worried about feeling isolated on the road, because my friends are all online anyway. Plus, I know what to do when my mental demons visit. 

I guess what I'm trying to say is that your friend might do very well on the road, but in my experience, he'd do the best if he has a handle on his head space. I wish him well in either case.


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## 4t7 (Aug 11, 2015)

Thanks for the replies everybody. Sorry it took so long to reply. Lots of good advice here and food for thought. I know this is kind of a half-assed response to what everybody has shared but I honestly don't know what else to say. I really do appreciate the responses though and I'm hoping to get a few more replies from you guys. I can REALLY use all the advice and insight I can get on the matter.


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## 4t7 (Aug 11, 2015)

Peace said:


> I have panic disorder and I'm also a mental health counselor.I think traveling and mental health issues really depends on the person. For me personally, I find traveling to be relaxing- yes there are times when I have anxiety, but I'm able to get through them fine. On the other hand, I work with some clients who I know would not do well on the road. I think the best bet would be to find out his diagnosis (assuming he has one) and go from there. If you have any specific questions about what he may or may not have, feel free to PM me =]



Thanks Peace. I may take you up on the offer. Really appreciate it [emoji41]


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## 4t7 (Aug 11, 2015)

7xMichael said:


> There are a lot of free resources out there for people who are poor and need assistance with their mental health.
> 
> If you feel like you can use a little help, it is there. If you send me a pm with the city you are in I'll look up the free resources available for you



Thanks man.


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## MikeGonett7739 (Jan 4, 2017)

Personally, i find that the freedom that is offered by the road is the best medication for my mental ailments. I have several different.. problems, each of which is unique to itself and difficult for me to speak on. The high highs and low lows of manic depression, the intense isolation of paranoid hallucinations, crippling anxiety and panic attacks, all of these work on their own and in tandom to crush my spirit and push me off the edge. i find that traveling is the only thing that TRULY erases the burden of my thoughts, maybe it has to do with the lack of responsibility, maybe it has something to do with pulling myself out of a stressful situation (life)


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## Renegade (Jan 5, 2017)

I know this is an old topic but I do have some input on it, me personally.. I thrive on high stress and living in the moment.. however some people can't take the road . Example, I took one of my friends under my wing 5 years ago and taught them how to rubber tramp..well about a month in out of nowhere they had a total schizophrenic episode and became psychotic from stress..ended up ditching me in West Texas took all my shit and left me stranded with not even a coat and it was cold that winter.. they ended up coming back after a threat or two over voice mail. . I gently reminded them that I know where they live and shit was about to get real. ..they said they heard demons talking to them saying I was evil. .
I don't usually teach people how to travle anymore because of this'.. I have also had my face slashed open by someone during their episode. . I hope your friend faired well as,it's been over a year I'm sure he left already. .just be careful who you trust.


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## Renegade (Jan 5, 2017)

..double post sry


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## Supposed Mocha (Jan 8, 2017)

Oh boy time to hop on this old thread too.

Totally agree with everyone else who's said their illnesses have gotten better on the road. Coming from pure obsessional compulsive disorder, the monotonous rat race and me don't get along as having zero control over my life and choices leaves me in a massive rut where I can't stop having breakdowns and lashing out at people around me from all the crap going through my head. Getting to move around on my own accord and do what I want, both distracts me and lets me feel I'm the one at the wheel so I can actually live my life again. Sure it can get stressful, but somehow its so much easier for my obsessions and fears to be about where I'm gonna sleep that night rather than how I'm gonna deal with some asshole at a wageslaving job. 

Meditation tho, if one is into it... well its a great thing to do on the road and get good at when problems arise. Also I like to think that its less an illness, and more a different perspective on a clearly sick world and society. Guess that's how I got led into travel among other things.  Hope you and your friend are doing great too!


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