# Losing my mind...Anyone willing to help a guy out?



## GhostWithTheMost (Sep 19, 2019)

Whats up everyone, I just need to vent a little, while at the same time seeking some advise/ communication.

So Ive been housed up now since 2014, lived on the street for almost 15 years up until 2011, and struggled for 4 years before finally getting off the street. The thing is, is that now ive been so ridiculously lonely, and feel so isolated and disconnected. Aside from my fiance, who works nights and sleeps most of the days except her off days I dont know anyone here where I live. Ive lost contact with pretty much everyone I knew outside. Ive been living with non-responsive depression my entire life, but the last year its been pretty bad. I miss everyone, and just wish I could meet people again...Im stuck in nascar-bible land with no other like minded people so far. Its just gotten so hard on me mentally, i feel either empty, or serious despair most of the time..there isnt much of an in between. Im in Southern Ohio, which is where ive been since getting off the street...

So i guess what im asking and all is if there is anyone out there willing to maybe just give a guy some company sometime, even if just on here to have some kind of steady communication, it would probably keep me from a rope at some point. I just am at a loss for what to do, I have a bike and it helps when I can ride, but I dont have much else than that. Sorry to lay this random shit out there...But if anyones down to shoot me some (Serious) advice or just chat man...Please hit me up. 

Until, be safe out there guys.

Fist and Faith
*Squirrell-SQRL 503-208-740*


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## Deleted member 26446 (Sep 19, 2019)

Oh, shit, a fellow Celt haha. Dude, you're legit a hop, a skip, and a jump from where I'm camping. I can understand where you're coming from, housed life was the loneliest time of my entire life; ya' ever need to talk feel free to hit me up. There's the StO Discord too, man: it's generally fairly active. 

I'm currently working so that I have some cash before I head off again. Could be anywhere from 2-6 more months as I have some loose-ends to tie up. If ya' wanna kick it during that time I'd be game, most any weekend would be good for me and catching a ride around here is cake so easy come, easy go.


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## starpurple (Sep 19, 2019)

start a bike gang with the local groms and learn wheelies and stuff? maybe try volunteer and visit with old people in homes? idk i struggle to find new friends today and im often alone too. i usually just go skate. i meet kids at the skate park and jus shoot the shit


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## Deleted member 24782 (Sep 19, 2019)

Would love to come visit next time I pass through Ohio.


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## GhostWithTheMost (Sep 19, 2019)

WavesAtDeer said:


> Oh, shit, a fellow Celt haha. Dude, you're legit a hop, a skip, and a jump from where I'm camping. I can understand where you're coming from, housed life was the loneliest time of my entire life; ya' ever need to talk feel free to hit me up. There's the StO Discord too, man: it's generally fairly active.
> 
> I'm currently working so that I have some cash before I head off again. Could be anywhere from 2-6 more months as I have some loose-ends to tie up. If ya' wanna kick it during that time I'd be game, most any weekend would be good for me and catching a ride around here is cake so easy come, easy go.




Hey man, yeah id be down to hang out some time. if you can message me on here I could get you my number or what not.


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## GhostWithTheMost (Sep 19, 2019)

starpurple said:


> start a bike gang with the local groms and learn wheelies and stuff? maybe try volunteer and visit with old people in homes? idk i struggle to find new friends today and im often alone too. i usually just go skate. i meet kids at the skate park and jus shoot the shit




Haha, wrong kind of bike man. I ride BMX not motorbikes ha. I miss skating too but havent had a board in a while. Our park here sucks..all the kids are those "Supreme" wearing type of kids mostly either that or 12 year olds..and they arent much conversation usually.


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## GhostWithTheMost (Sep 19, 2019)

Brodiesel710 said:


> Would love to come visit next time I pass through Ohio.




Just give me a heads up so I can clear it with my mate. But im up.


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## GhostWithTheMost (Sep 19, 2019)

I dont know that it matters, but I suppose throwing out there that Im Straight Edge (39 years and counting) might clear somethings out. Not a hardliner, just dont do anything personally.


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## Barf (Sep 20, 2019)

Are you cooped up at your pad all day?

Isolation is a bitch.

If you're a grown ass person you gotta do something.

Find a reason to get out of the house for an hour or two.

Trust me shmang, I know.


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## GhostWithTheMost (Sep 20, 2019)

Barf said:


> Are you cooped up at your pad all day?
> 
> Isolation is a bitch.
> 
> ...



Yeah pretty much man...The town i live in is shit for anything to do. More churches and restaurants than anything else. Plus where I live its an hour walk one way just to get into town, so that in itself can be daunting sometimes...I dont mind the hike, but when its every time I want to get out and do something it can be tiring especially with the heat recently.


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## LuckyMinnie (Sep 21, 2019)

An hour walk to get anywhere? You really are isolated. I was going to suggest taking a class at the community college, just to have something to occupy your mind and maybe make a friend by being a study partner. But it sounds like you're nowhere near a college. Social isolation isn't healthy. Does your fiance have a car that you can borrow when you go out? How is this situation going to work long term? In my point of view, you need to communicate with her. Tell her being isolated and cooped up is not good for you mentally. Maybe y'all can come up with a solution. I wonder if there are any volunteer opportunities in your town. If you are volunteering, people will probably give you a ride, and you get a lot of satisfaction from the social interaction and the fact that you've helped someone. Idk. I'm trying to think of solutions. Hopefully something I've said turns out to be useful. I'm open for conversations if that can help you.


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## GhostWithTheMost (Sep 21, 2019)

LuckyMinnie said:


> An hour walk to get anywhere? You really are isolated. I was going to suggest taking a class at the community college, just to have something to occupy your mind and maybe make a friend by being a study partner. But it sounds like you're nowhere near a college. Social isolation isn't healthy. Does your fiance have a car that you can borrow when you go out? How is this situation going to work long term? In my point of view, you need to communicate with her. Tell her being isolated and cooped up is not good for you mentally. Maybe y'all can come up with a solution. I wonder if there are any volunteer opportunities in your town. If you are volunteering, people will probably give you a ride, and you get a lot of satisfaction from the social interaction and the fact that you've helped someone. Idk. I'm trying to think of solutions. Hopefully something I've said turns out to be useful. I'm open for conversations if that can help you.




Yeah, we have a community college here, but its a bit farther out, think maybe an hour and 45 minute walk from my place. Taking a class would be a good idea, and have thought about it, but im on disability, so funds are tight..and I accidentally defaulted on a student loan back in like 2004 so cant get financial aid until thats paid off. Me and my mate have talked about the moving issue, we actually lived in town up until last october, but her grandma offered to let her move into her old place (where we are now) and she was all about it, she is the "wants a white picket fence and yard" type, Im the opposite. I didnt want to move here and she knew that, but she opted to move anyways..and I couldnt afford my old apartment by myself sadly. So here I am, compromising sucks sometimes. As far as volunteering goes, im not sure of any places in this town that does that. I mean literally the population here is less than 23,000 people...so its not really the kind of place that has a lot of option. Predominately pill-heads, and junkies, if you dont do the bar thing or church, theres not much to do. Seriously go to google maps and look up chillicothe Ohio, then just type church in the search thing..its crazy lol


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## Coywolf (Sep 21, 2019)

I'm glad to see this post. Not that I'm glad you are feeling alone or helpless, just glad that people have built this fuckign thing called StP so that someone like yourself can post something like you just posted.

I say this to everyone who is housed up after being on the road for so long. Ever though of foaming? I know most foamers suck, but there are plenty of people out there that used to travel and now just get to know EVERYTHING that the rail companies are up to.

Also, ya, StP discord chat. Easy way to meet people.

Best of luck. I feel the road always comes around after you have ditched out for a while...loves to slap you in the face with opportunities.


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## Koala (Sep 21, 2019)

Getting a bicycle could help cut down that commute time by so much, and give you independence to check out new places and maybe get involved in something in town

Edit: oops didn't see in your post you do have a bike! Having wheels is great


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## CaptainT (Sep 22, 2019)

Hey so what shit are you into? Other then bikes?


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## GhostWithTheMost (Sep 22, 2019)

Coywolf said:


> I'm glad to see this post. Not that I'm glad you are feeling alone or helpless, just glad that people have built this fuckign thing called StP so that someone like yourself can post something like you just posted.
> 
> I say this to everyone who is housed up after being on the road for so long. Ever though of foaming? I know most foamers suck, but there are plenty of people out there that used to travel and now just get to know EVERYTHING that the rail companies are up to.
> 
> ...




I keep seeing that, but what is discord? lol Sorry Im not up on a lot of things still, I mean i know/think its another kind of website, just no idea what it is or how to use it.


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## GhostWithTheMost (Sep 22, 2019)

Koala said:


> Getting a bicycle could help cut down that commute time by so much, and give you independence to check out new places and maybe get involved in something in town
> 
> Edit: oops didn't see in your post you do have a bike! Having wheels is great



No worries ha, yeah im working on getting a more comfortable bike for longer riding. Got a BMX but for a ten mile round trip roughly (5 miles in- and 5 back) its not the greatest for getting around.


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## GhostWithTheMost (Sep 22, 2019)

CaptainT said:


> Hey so what shit are you into? Other then bikes?



Mostly nerdy shit lol I mean i hike and what not when i can, but play a lot of Xbox in the last couple years ive been housed up. Do a bit of DIY crafting from time to time when I can find the inspiration or bits and pieces to make stuff. But it varies, really...


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## Stiv Rhodes (Sep 22, 2019)

I've lived a half hour walk from a bus line outside a fairly small town with no car. The isolation and physical rigor definitely put me to the test. I didn't mind the long walk so much when the weather was nice, but the other half of the year really got to me. Volunteering at the local food bank and soup kitchen was a good outlet for me to meet people. They were mostly elderly religious folks, but the nice ones, and it turned out to be a good exercise in relating to people along our similarities while putting our differences aside. I was also a good social bridge between the staff and the folks working off court ordered probation, and they were in dire need of helpers in their physical prime. My bicycle was extremely important to me during that time, as was my computer/internet access , but there's no real substitute for human connection. I found that a lot of rednecks liked to chat and share skills on the DIY handicraft stuff even though our politics were in stark contrast to each other. This website is a good outlet to reach out and hear like minded voices, hopefully one in your area.

Stay strong.


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## Coywolf (Sep 22, 2019)

Discord is a live StP chat. They have the link on the main homepage somewhere. Some interesting shit goes down there, lol


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## GhostWithTheMost (Sep 22, 2019)

Coywolf said:


> Discord is a live StP chat. They have the link on the main homepage somewhere. Some interesting shit goes down there, lol



Oh rad, thanks..Ill have to see if I can figure shit out. Seems like it could be cool.


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