# The Madness of Forced Domestication



## Deleted member 28317 (Apr 19, 2020)

Here i stay, again, in the city that brings out the worst in me.

The apex human zoo. The place that gave birth to the great plagues of our time. A festering heap of human tissue scrambling and tearing for survival.

I told myself the next time i was forced to return here, would be my last.

A populous de-armed, castrated and homogenised.

The swirlings of rage continue. My head is drunken with these thoughts, i can hardly maintain right now.

Rumi tells us that it is only in the seeking of disharmony that we are ever able to find peace. Yet, how can this be accepted. Disharmony is all around us, all the time. Disharmony is the getting up at 6am to shit, piss and force-feed yourself before a day of salary-prostitution. Disharmony is waiting in the bread-lines while farmers burn crops and pour milk . Everything has gone topsy-turvy. An inverse of meaning where nothing is true. As much as the Randian philosophy lacks, in this understanding it was very accurate.

The circus band continues their discordant racket, whipping the crowd into increasing states of delirium and hallucination. This tightness of the chest, the sounds grip me totally, cancelling out all possibly of rational attention. The swirl and spirals. The laughter and distortions. I have to escape this place.


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## MFB (Apr 19, 2020)

Bukowski fan I take it? 😊

Try and find Bang the Piano like a Percussion Instrument until the Fingers Begin to Bleed a Bit. Your post could be on the first page 
Or any of his prose. 
I think youll be able to relate


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## roughdraft (Apr 19, 2020)

you seem like you might be a Godspeed You! Black Emperor fan, check out "sleep" and "the dead flag blues" and "rockets fall on rocket falls" - and shit, check out "mogwai fear satan" while yr at it, really good music to just eat


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## Deleted member 28317 (Apr 19, 2020)

MFB said:


> Bukowski fan I take it? 😊



Bukowski changed my whole perception of what it meant to be a writer.

His writing usually comforts and settles me down, but this time i may be too far gone

I'll be looking at getting a tent and bivy next week if i can't find somewhere


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## MFB (Apr 19, 2020)

I LOVED Bukowski when I was young and angry,
as I got older I find his prose depressing.
Some of his fiction stuff his still humorous, Ham on Rye is a good romp.

@StarMage have you read David Foster Wallace's Infinite Jest?
Its a BEAST. But a good read if you are commited and may help you out with where you are at right now.
Again, I loved it when I was young and angry, whereas I tried to reread it last year and its just too fatalistic for me to stomach.


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## Barf (Apr 20, 2020)

Welcome

I have a Black Sparrow first edition of Factotum somewhere in my study.

Pulp was cool.


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## Deleted member 28317 (Apr 20, 2020)

MFB said:


> Have you read David Foster Wallace's Infinite Jest?



It is indeed a beast, i haven't tackled it yet but am very familiar with it from a cultural pov

Buk's work is very accessible for even the entry-level reader, yet it's structural beauty will satisfy even the most academic.

But right now i can't be getting lost in my library, now is time for some practical moves. Of which, i know not.

To be reading DFW in the belly on the machine is just a bit too hair-raising for me. My favourite time to read realism is on a beachside somewhere. I like the contrast. IJ may just give me the final impetus to start in on that chaos ideal again.

So for now, i am going to be focused on what is within my control, what will predict long-term survival, and how to control this wild energy that is clouding my mind.


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## Deleted member 28317 (Apr 20, 2020)

"Seek Disharmony"
"Surrender Yourself"
"Be of No-Mind"

Why do the sages say such things?

Maybe theirs is a perspective that can only be gained upon reaching those heights.

A climber may need rope to summit the peak, but upon the apex, the rope is no longer required. 
Is it so with the mind?

My whole aim with the mystical practices is that of regaining control.

Control over these energies and thoughts that bombard me so. Waves and waves that erode the ballasts of my faculties.

They want to see surrender?

I would liken it more to madness.

Do they want madness?

It would seem so


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## Odin (Apr 20, 2020)

MFB said:


> Bukowski fan I take it? 😊





MFB said:


> Ham on Rye is a good romp.




LOL I still believe one of the most educational places in ones youth... is under the bleachers.


::drinkingbuddy::


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## Odin (Apr 20, 2020)

That reminds me... I still have to read WOMEN. WOooooooo Man. haha.... 


Guess I mixed mike myers in there...


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## MFB (Apr 20, 2020)

Women is a riot! Though at my age it hits too close to home.



StarMage said:


> "Seek Disharmony"
> 
> 
> A climber may need rope to summit the peak, but upon the apex, the rope is no longer required.
> Is it so with the mind?


I've climbed a lot. The metaphor for me in that experience was always
"Yea, your on the peak, but ya still gotta get down."
The peak is only the half way point.
Ya dig?


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## Deleted member 28317 (Apr 20, 2020)

MFB said:


> The peak is only the half way point.
> Ya dig?



I do see that, and metaphors can get tricky

Though this particular one, i enjoy talking through immensely, not all have the patience to hash out the details, which is understandable.

I wonder how the great writers of our time would have reacted to our current state of forced domestication.


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## MFB (Apr 20, 2020)

@StarMage 
How do you feel forced?
BC I feel free as a bird!

Do have a wife and kids or own a house?
Are you free to be where you want to be?


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## Deleted member 28317 (Apr 20, 2020)

@MFB I have none of the above, but i felt it forced as i was recalled back to the fatherland, as well as the sanctions going around for breaking quarantine for any reason deemed non-essential.
See, i have even memorised their rhetoric. Pitiful.

There are still ways i can resist, currently exploring the options.


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## MFB (Apr 21, 2020)

@StarMage
Ah, I see.
I'm in Arizona so I'm still free to cruise around on my bike and climb red rock everyday.
I wish I had some advice to give; but unfortunately all I can say is 'patience' my friend.
Silly goose times.
On a bright note, you have plenty of time to read, write, and contemplate what you want to do when you are free to do it.

I've been using the extra COVID time I've had to learn the art of gibberish from the master himself, @Juan Derlust . I can't see it every being useful, but I am learning, that's the point! 

In closing, @StarMage , sending positive energy your way, my friend!


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## Odin (Apr 21, 2020)

MFB said:


> I've been using the extra COVID time I've had to learn the art of gibberish from the master himself, @Juan Derlust . I can't see it every being useful, but I am learning, that's the point!



Many perceptions lead to misdirection.... 



MFB said:


> In closing, @StarMage , sending positive energy your way, my friend!



Search the stars... they hold something we wonder for centuries that binds mankind.



Juan Derlust said:


> There is no greater reward than observing my pupil achieve greater heights than I ever could



The master the student and the teacher.... all covet their own position on top of the Hill.


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## SoyPablo (Apr 25, 2020)

Tropic of Cancer always managed to lift my spirits when I read it -- give it a go if you haven't already. Henry knew what time it was way back when and so much still rings true all these years later.

Old Man Miller would surely dig my sig below:


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## roughdraft (Apr 25, 2020)

SoyPablo said:


> Tropic of Cancer always managed to lift my spirits when I read it -- give it a go if you haven't already. Henry knew what time it was way back when and so much still rings true all these years later.
> 
> Old Man Miller would surely dig my sig below:



hard agree, my favorite book and author by far. 

he strikes a perfect balance between high language and accessibility


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## MFB (Apr 26, 2020)

Love Henry Miller;
and piggybacking on him;
for anyone that likes dirty stuff
Anais Nin is really fun to read as well.


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## Deleted member 28317 (Apr 29, 2020)

SoyPablo said:


> Tropic of Cancer always managed to lift my spirits when I read it -- give it a go if you haven't already. Henry knew what time it was way back when and so much still rings true all these years later.
> Old Man Miller would surely dig my sig below:



Miller.. Was he the also author of 86'd? About the alcoholic limosine driver, or maybe the drug-addicted telemarketer, some of these books tend to swirl around in my head forming a universe of debauchery all on their own.


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## SoyPablo (May 1, 2020)

StarMage said:


> Miller.. Was he the also author of 86'd? About the alcoholic limosine driver, or maybe the drug-addicted telemarketer, some of these books tend to swirl around in my head forming a universe of debauchery all on their own.


No, Henry didn't write that one -- Google-Fu tells me that it was written by Dan Fante, who I am unfamiliar with.


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## Odin (May 1, 2020)

I don't give a shit who wrote what... 

The question is ... what books are ... 

Write it and give it in all languages... 

ARE WE FREE!!!!!!!!!

Anyone ready to answer?


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