# Growing a beard



## happyearthhomes

So I am growing out my beard trying to do a viking two point any tips for beard grooming my dad cant grow one but i sure can just never have so he is no help and i noticed a few members were sporting some good ones I am like 2 months in and have been trying to train it to grow a certain way by brushing it like 5 times a day i know there is a beard pomenate but i dont want grease in it cus i only use water and sand to bathe with soap root and baby powder for a clean fresh smell so any tips are appreciated on june 1st i started a no shaving or haircutting objective of 1 year


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## nivoldoog

Good luck with the beard, annoying as shit at first, and end. Been growing mine for like 9 months now, I am trying to get mine close to poisidens, still stuck on davey jones, got some shitty dreds in it to keep it contained other wise it looks like a mane for a lion. Rawr!


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## happyearthhomes

ya i am past all the itchy parts i am about where urs is in ur pik mine grows fast at first and than seems to hang out in the zak galifanakis stage for bout 3 months i have gone 5 mos b4


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## Cardboard

step one, stop shaving. Step two, beard.
http://a3.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc1/6571_110108735171_505075171_2347103_5832647_n.jpg


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## dprogram

Haven't shaved in a week or so and this shit always itches at this stage...how long does it take to stop itching? lol


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## happyearthhomes

30 days 45days 45days


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## happyearthhomes

last pic also has a gun show


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## bryanpaul

hahaha.....hells yeah...lookin like a lumberjack and shit..............


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## dprogram

Damn hippy! J/K Looks tough man. Before you know it the guys from ZZ Top will be jealous.


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## happyearthhomes

I want the zz top beard thats what im goin 4


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## Vonuist

Coconut oil is brilliant for beards, I just rub some on my hands and massage it in every few days. It smells nice, keeps the beard healthy & shiny and moisturises it.It's great for your skin too.
Most shampoos are unsuitable for beards because sodium laureth sulphate (the foaming agent) dries them out too much and causes split ends, which leaves your beard looking very scraggy and crappy. Best to keep things simple. Herbal shampoos are good, I use a jojoba and seaweed one, but soapwort and spagnum moss does just as well in the woods.

On a more absurdist note:
If it gets really long you might want to keep a double-ended toothpick tucked away in it's recesses. It can be very amusing when some shit-head grabs you by your beard and gets spiked in the palm.

Here's a picture of my very scruffy beard. Apologies for looking like a serial killer.
http://farm7.static.flickr.com/6202/6084914453_11fedee1fa.jpg


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## happyearthhomes

ya dude i been using a african american orientated coconut hair product on it cslled clubman bay rum. it has kept it soft and moisturised. i dont use shampoo its very harmful to you and the environment. our current mass production soaps dry out the natural oils our bodys produce to protect ourselves from the elements and sun. and then they add wax to make us look like we would if we didnt use their products. Which we than have to use a product to remove it. very circular and designed to make us slaves to chemicals


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## happyearthhomes

Nice trick with the toothpick and I am not sure but i think GQ said the serial killer look is in this fall


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## plagueship

you just gotta ride out the itching. i don't know about bathing with sand but i wash mine with soap and/or shampoo on a regular basis or else it gets greasy/itchy/gross. i also trim it a little here and there so that the overall shape stays nice for my follicle pattern


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## Puckett

if you smoke you can use the ash from your cigarette and rub it into your beard. the carbon keeps it soft and smooth and eaisier to work with. at least thats what my brother says and he has a sick beard.


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## LeeevinKansas

happyearthhomes said:


> ya i am past all the itchy parts i am about where urs is in ur pik mine grows fast at first and than seems to hang out in the zak galifanakis stage for bout 3 months i have gone 5 mos b4



FUCKIN RIGHT!?? lmao.

everytime i got a good beard growing in the past id end up shaving it off for some gay reason.

but right man? ive had this thing growing now for like 3 months almost and its just stuck in the same position.

my number one problem is when ive got idle time on my hands and i subconsciously start munching on the thing. fuckin annoying. or twisting the thing this way and that. it looks small but i cant get the damn thing to grow man. its like going half a millimeter a day.


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## happyearthhomes

i understand it seems to go real slow after the first 2 inches i keep having to trim what would be my side burns in order to keep it looking even or else they would be like 5 inches long


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## spoorprint

I tied but it was too complicated. i'm just not that smart.


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## dharma bum

man i've had a beard for about 2 yrs. i remember asking about beard maintenance a while back. it does ittch after a little while, and then it doesn't. then it itches again and you've got beard dandriff
a little longer than that, i started to get split ends and broken hairs.
i grabbed some type of cream called groom & clean from the black section of the hair dept of wal mart.
seems to be working great.


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## happyearthhomes

Suffered a horrible grooming accident this morning. I was trimming the beard and the height guard popped off and i cut into my beard had to shave a big portion off. I left a large goatee and am starting th beard again to grow into it. I have become obsessed with my beard. My wife thinks i am an idiot.


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## happyearthhomes




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## Puckett

sorry for the loss of your beard. lol


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## happyearthhomes

Pucket those are hilarious pics i didnt know about that site


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## NyxNomasters

You know when you find long lady hairs floating around? Well, we shed all our hairs periodically and they grow in at different rates. Keep growing it out and don't worry about patches that don't grow in right away. They will eventually. I recommend using an electric trimmer or scissors to simply trim around the edges and the mustache part to keep it looking nice. Also a big fan of the Amish beard where just the mustache is trimmed off. 

I second that coconut oil emotion.


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## dharma bum

happyearthhomes said:


> I left a large goatee and am starting th beard again to grow into it. I have become obsessed with my beard. My wife thinks i am an idiot.



beard separates the men from the goatees.


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## Nelco

thought about growing a beard but decided it would be to much work to keep up with


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## Stope

This thread makes me sad that I shaved off my scruff.


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## dharma bum

"without a beard you're the same as every other woman and child"
-greek proverb


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## Puckett

dharma bum said:


> "without a beard you're the same as every other woman and child"
> -greek proverb


they had a pic of that saying like the other ones, and a pic of a guy shaving with the caption that says ''she's not worth it''


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## dharma bum

Puckett said:


> they had a pic of that saying like the other ones, and a pic of a guy shaving with the caption that says ''she's not worth it''



yeah i saw it on beardly.com they have lots of good ones


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## LeeevinKansas

what is a good tonic or solution to straightening beards? i understand that beards are pretty much like pubes on your fucking face.

ive noticed that when i use conditioner on my beard, and comb it through, then wash it out and blow dry it down its slightly more straighter each time.


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## wildboy860

i've had a beard for over 3 years now and i do nothing but shave my mustache every few months when the hair starts to get in my mouth and i also suffer from beard dandruff here and there, but as with my dread dandruff im used to it, sometimes i put alill tea tree oil in it and that helps. besides that i dont do anything else and i get compliments all the time.


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## Earth

I treat me beard no different than me hair.
Enjoy it!!


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## Vonuist

LeeevinKansas said:


> what is a good tonic or solution to straightening beards? i understand that beards are pretty much like pubes on your fucking face.
> 
> ive noticed that when i use conditioner on my beard, and comb it through, then wash it out and blow dry it down its slightly more straighter each time.



Mane n Tail or any other kind of conditioner made for horse hair.


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## Kim Chee

I've been growing mine for awhile and ran across this website.
It has lots of pictures and stories. Many different styles of
beards. Everything you ever wanted to know about beards
is probably covered there:

http://www.beards.org/




No, this isn't me its just an example of what you can find there.


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## Vonuist

In the UK we have The British Beard Club which, like most things in the UK, appears to be primarily an excuse for drinking a lot of Ale.


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## Puckett

http://putyourbeardinmymouth.tumblr.com/


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