stealth pissing (aimed -no pun- for the guys....)

ScumRag

ScumRag

me, hellarity, oak, ca. about 2006
ever got caught by the PD for pissing in public?
tonight at the bus depot -i shit you not- a cruiser went by, did their little flash dance & said on their loud speaker
"DONT DO IT AGAIN!"

well, fuck man! I gotta piss somehwere. the bathrooms are closed cuz of 9/11 and so i'm caught waving at the cops
with my D in my hand.

any tips im missing cuz i really don't wanna go down as a sex offender just fer waving my D in an alley
 
Yep, but fortunately with no consequences, just being told "not to do it again" as you experienced it.

Well, tips ... when I needed to ... and nothing was open (no McD, no KFC, etc, no puplic toilets) I always tried to find a really quite alleyway where you wouldn't be surprised by cops or some park where you can go behind some bushes or alike.

But it can be difficult and annoying. Especially in large cities where it's hard to find a spot with no one (and no cctv) around.

Basel, Switzerland was best. Public, self-cleaning toilets everywhere, and you could use them for free. :)
 
yea this one time i actually got detained and they didn't let me go till i proved to them that i wasn't wanted
 
I usually have good luck peeing into bushes etc near rivers and in quiet parks. Remember, the last thing you wanna do is turn around and piss on the cops legs and shoes (a mate did that and wound up beaten up and arrested for the night(drunk tank))
 
Just take 2 more minutes to find a better spot. Train tracks off the right of way behind buildings, in the bushes near freeway onramps/offramps, places that distance you from a road that's easy for them to roll up on you.
 
I take this very seriously because of the sex offender part attached these days. I sit yes, sit in metro areas where it is impossible to hold and find a safe spot because of closings. I have gotten quite used to it actually. That dumb law, made it very practical for me. I find that a parking lot - Publix or some other, sitting on the parking block facing away from the roadway and if possible, in the medians also within a parking lot. It is much easier for them to tell you to quit loitering than stop pissing. Sitting is very stealthy for Men, no one expects that is what you are doing. Just wing it out and keep your feet out of the way :D
 
Also be aware of your posturing. If you're using both hands and arching your back, it's pretty fuckin obvious what you're doing. If you're looking at your phone with one hand raised up and kinda standing in a way that makes pissing uncomfortable, maybe even direct that stream off to the side that way you're not facing directly at a bush or whatever. There's all kinds of tricks to making it less obvious.
 
Vance Lee said:
I take this very seriously because of the sex offender part attached these days. I sit yes, sit in metro areas where it is impossible to hold and find a safe spot because of closings. I have gotten quite used to it actually. That dumb law, made it very practical for me. I find that a parking lot - Publix or some other, sitting on the parking block facing away from the roadway and if possible, in the medians also within a parking lot. It is much easier for them to tell you to quit loitering than stop pissing. Sitting is very stealthy for Men, no one expects that is what you are doing. Just wing it out and keep your feet out of the way :D
Click to expand...

you must be pulling some david copperfield shit with a 24 inch dick that you can just unroll away from you while you pee or im picturing this completely wrong, because i dont see anyway to sit down and stealthy take a piss without pissing all over myself or cutting up my johnson on my zipper trying to hide the fact that i got skin in hand.
 
SlankyLanky said:
you must be pulling some david copperfield shit with a 24 inch dick that you can just unroll away from you while you pee or im picturing this completely wrong, because i dont see anyway to sit down and stealthy take a piss without pissing all over myself or cutting up my johnson on my zipper trying to hide the fact that i got skin in hand.
Click to expand...

Yeah rite? Wtf is that shit about? I can't sit & piss even in shorts
 
Well, I haven't had to do it in anything but shorts - I'm in Florida. I sit and pull the shorts to the side and let go - quickly. That is as graphic as I need to be I guess. Each there own, but at 55, it is not as easily held as it once was. :D Not unlike pissing in a gatorade bottle on a road trip.
 
Vance Lee said:
Well, I haven't had to do it in anything but shorts - I'm in Florida. I sit and pull the shorts to the side and let go - quickly.
Click to expand...

i just dont see how this is any more practical then just pissing behind a building or on a wall, if a cop rolled up outta nowhere and told you to move on theres really nothing hiding the (what im assuming at this point since you had to piss so bad) giant piss puddle right under neath you.
 
I was once asked by a bored security guard "hey! What'ya doing there?".
He was like yelling at me, saving the day this hero fuck.
I was at the end, making sure no drops back in pants, so the asshole assumed I was jerking off or something.

I looked at him straight in the eyes and said "well, what do you think I was doing?"

What a jerk. It wasn't anywhere near children, or people for that matter. ANY reasonable person would understand I was just peeing
 
Good lord - I work downtown - I see pissers all the time. Just keep on moving and remember what my sister said when we were in Mexico - "see that wet spot up ahead? Keep in mind that it has not rained here in 4 months - and there were many wet spots in the corners ...". Eyes down and step lightly. :)
 
can't speak for anywhere else but if you're ever in the UK i wouldn't worry about this - they don't give a shit as long as you're not very blatantly pissing in the middle of the street

if it seems like you've made even the vaguest bit of effort going somewhere people wouldn't normally go they'll likely let you off - unless you're very obviously drunk, at which point they might nab you for that instead
 
mono said:
can't speak for anywhere else but if you're ever in the UK i wouldn't worry about this - they don't give a shit as long as you're not very blatantly pissing in the middle of the street
Click to expand...

I woudld worry about it. I was in UK ...
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top