Nitemare85
New member
hello guys my name is noel from texas nothing really interesting going on with my life I have 3 kids, relationship isn't so hot,work a shitty job anyway enough about me anyone from texas?
Greetings from Texas
- Thread starter Nitemare85
- Start date
not from texas, but..
what's going on with the home life?
how are the kids?
what's the job..?
man.. it's fucking tough..
we are born with all this idealism..
idealism we could *practice* & *achieve*, if we were just allowed to operate within the context of the freedom of our fucking ignorance, rather than being forced to try & achieve those same ends within the constraints of what is 'allowed' without the punishment derived from law...
without giving others profit for being traitors to our race..
man.. i fucking feel for you..
you can't even be a goddamned father without your kids or your parenthood not merely being threatened, but you have to deal with your kids being fouled by all the bullshit *they're* assailed with, too..
& so what do you do?
work your shit job that you hate, trying to keep what you love alive?
continue to be hit by criticisms from those whom you love the most about how fucking inadequate you are?
keep fighting the circumstances your kids spiral towards that you feel you have no way to materially deflect?
tear yourself up because you are trying so hard, but falling so short of what you hoped for & loved?
& love..?
yes.
the answer is fucking yes.
there are any number of kids on here who will tell you that the people they now hate most, or are at least are most disappointed with, are the ones they once loved most..
don't fucking give up, man..
don't give up..
there comes a time when you can say that you have not done only what was 'required' of you, but that you did your best to do what you *hoped* to do, however imperfect it was..
that honor, my friend, is not something only for yourself..
it is a thing which migrates into all those you took responsibility for, and although it frees you from nothing.. from absolutely *nothing*..
it also does not condemn you.
it is a thing which goes into those whom you have loved as deeply as fucking DN fucking A..
you can give no one any better tool for awareness than to show that you will not leave them.
make no excuses for yourself.
because as much as honor is the force through which very destiny determines what She shall do with us, Honor is also an act of will..
anything worth teaching is worth risking loss..
you may work your ass off only to find your kids become manipulative shits no matter *how* much you busted your fucking nuts degreasing walmart fucking floormats..
but..
but...
we can all yap for hours...
unity.. you need unity..
what are some of the problems in the relationship?
any way to fix them, or make stuff better?
peace, bro,
c
what's going on with the home life?
how are the kids?
what's the job..?
man.. it's fucking tough..
we are born with all this idealism..
idealism we could *practice* & *achieve*, if we were just allowed to operate within the context of the freedom of our fucking ignorance, rather than being forced to try & achieve those same ends within the constraints of what is 'allowed' without the punishment derived from law...
without giving others profit for being traitors to our race..
man.. i fucking feel for you..
you can't even be a goddamned father without your kids or your parenthood not merely being threatened, but you have to deal with your kids being fouled by all the bullshit *they're* assailed with, too..
& so what do you do?
work your shit job that you hate, trying to keep what you love alive?
continue to be hit by criticisms from those whom you love the most about how fucking inadequate you are?
keep fighting the circumstances your kids spiral towards that you feel you have no way to materially deflect?
tear yourself up because you are trying so hard, but falling so short of what you hoped for & loved?
& love..?
yes.
the answer is fucking yes.
there are any number of kids on here who will tell you that the people they now hate most, or are at least are most disappointed with, are the ones they once loved most..
don't fucking give up, man..
don't give up..
there comes a time when you can say that you have not done only what was 'required' of you, but that you did your best to do what you *hoped* to do, however imperfect it was..
that honor, my friend, is not something only for yourself..
it is a thing which migrates into all those you took responsibility for, and although it frees you from nothing.. from absolutely *nothing*..
it also does not condemn you.
it is a thing which goes into those whom you have loved as deeply as fucking DN fucking A..
you can give no one any better tool for awareness than to show that you will not leave them.
make no excuses for yourself.
because as much as honor is the force through which very destiny determines what She shall do with us, Honor is also an act of will..
anything worth teaching is worth risking loss..
you may work your ass off only to find your kids become manipulative shits no matter *how* much you busted your fucking nuts degreasing walmart fucking floormats..
but..
but...
we can all yap for hours...
unity.. you need unity..
what are some of the problems in the relationship?
any way to fix them, or make stuff better?
peace, bro,
c
Hazardoussix6six
RideBikesPlayPolo
love reading creatures responses!
Nitemare85
New member
work at a call center, me and wife argue about past mistakes ive made"cheating". I love my kids they my reason for staying. It's just frustrating sometimes arguing over things that happened in the past. I don't give her reasons to doubt me every month we argue about it and sometimes she gets violent and hits me. Been like this off and on for 10 years. Sometimes I want out of the relationship and sometimes I say to myself you brought this on yourself for cheating. I try to avoid conflict and when I get angry I ignore my wife and she nags for me to forcefully talk to her even though I don't want to. She tells me she hates me wants me to die then acts like everything is normal. She says i play the victim and try to turn things around and say it's her fault. I'll give you an example I might get out of work late and text me where the fuck are you and I tell her just got out and she doesn't believe me.she says I've never gone out if my way l, which I have. And that I don't appreciate anything she's done which I do. When she's not like that things are ok. I don't know how I feel about her though im used to her I know that. So basically she gets mad, brings up the past we argue about it, it's a cycle month to month.
sounds tough, man..
you put "cheating" in quotes.. i think that's a fairly black & white issue..
i mean.. if you were physically intimate, at all, then i dunno if quotes should be used..
if you weren't, other than being caught with the clear intent to act, the you weren't..
if you were *thinking* about screwing around & got caught before you said "fuck it, i'm going for it", then even *that* isn't very grey, if you didn't try to screw around afterwards..
if it's just a matter of reigning in your imagination, well..
fantasy is about as hard to control as a heroin addiction, so don't be too hard on yourself, so long as you try to remain under discipline..
in that context you need to determine whether you *deserve* to be forgiven, or if your wife is just being a vengefull bitch who has no way to deal with her own frustrations, rather than to focus them upon you, because your guilt is the only thing in her life she has any power over.
did you actually cheat?
would you forgive her if she did the same thing?
is there anything she actually wants from life, other than material comforts?
i was thinking about your situation while working..
it kind of hit me: "do the two of them do anything together?"
i thought about a lot of things that married couples might do, but a lot of times that just reduces to watching movies together, or eating microwave dinners..
the it struck me further "maybe they should try exercising together.."
make a time in the day for it, to go out & first start, not by walking, but jogging for 5 minutes, if you both aren't too fit.. something where you have pay attention to something else (the effort), but are still both in each other's presence..
if yer in ok shape, maybe a bit more.. & i don't mean at a gym.. if the street is good enough, that.. if not, get to a park..
or hell, bicycle together.. but *something*..
my mom & dad used to have coffee together every morning at about 5 AM..
they'd listen to us kids get up, etc., talk & put the love they had for us to work..
yeah, they were republicans, or whatever, but they were hardcore..
who cooks?
what do you cook?
if she does, maybe you could try doing it a bit, if you can work it in..
get some super simple ingredients, a hot pan & love her with it..
snow peas,
salt,
chicken,
butter
sesame oil (1 teaspoon or so)
garlic crushed by palm, & crumbled in..
make the chicken boneless & skinless from legs or thighs, unless you find something already, at a good price...
sizzle that chicken in a tiny bit of water & salt, at first then when it's up to temp (all white on the outside, throw in the sesame oil, turn the heat way up, throw in half the garlic & sizzle in just the oil, until it starts to crisp brown to however dark you like.
bring the temp down, keep flipping, throw in half the butter.
when that melts, throw in the snow peas & other half of garlic..
flip until the snow peas just tender, throw in 2nd half of butter, flip a little & throw that stuff on a plate.
separate the snow peas & chicken a little, salt gently, sprinkling from your fingers, & then maybe garnish with a few thin apple slices (those sprinkled with just a little bit of brown sugar), fork on the plate, & say "i love you"..
i feel for you, man..
i hope you can work it out...
peace,
j
you put "cheating" in quotes.. i think that's a fairly black & white issue..
i mean.. if you were physically intimate, at all, then i dunno if quotes should be used..
if you weren't, other than being caught with the clear intent to act, the you weren't..
if you were *thinking* about screwing around & got caught before you said "fuck it, i'm going for it", then even *that* isn't very grey, if you didn't try to screw around afterwards..
if it's just a matter of reigning in your imagination, well..
fantasy is about as hard to control as a heroin addiction, so don't be too hard on yourself, so long as you try to remain under discipline..
in that context you need to determine whether you *deserve* to be forgiven, or if your wife is just being a vengefull bitch who has no way to deal with her own frustrations, rather than to focus them upon you, because your guilt is the only thing in her life she has any power over.
did you actually cheat?
would you forgive her if she did the same thing?
is there anything she actually wants from life, other than material comforts?
i was thinking about your situation while working..
it kind of hit me: "do the two of them do anything together?"
i thought about a lot of things that married couples might do, but a lot of times that just reduces to watching movies together, or eating microwave dinners..
the it struck me further "maybe they should try exercising together.."
make a time in the day for it, to go out & first start, not by walking, but jogging for 5 minutes, if you both aren't too fit.. something where you have pay attention to something else (the effort), but are still both in each other's presence..
if yer in ok shape, maybe a bit more.. & i don't mean at a gym.. if the street is good enough, that.. if not, get to a park..
or hell, bicycle together.. but *something*..
my mom & dad used to have coffee together every morning at about 5 AM..
they'd listen to us kids get up, etc., talk & put the love they had for us to work..
yeah, they were republicans, or whatever, but they were hardcore..
who cooks?
what do you cook?
if she does, maybe you could try doing it a bit, if you can work it in..
get some super simple ingredients, a hot pan & love her with it..
snow peas,
salt,
chicken,
butter
sesame oil (1 teaspoon or so)
garlic crushed by palm, & crumbled in..
make the chicken boneless & skinless from legs or thighs, unless you find something already, at a good price...
sizzle that chicken in a tiny bit of water & salt, at first then when it's up to temp (all white on the outside, throw in the sesame oil, turn the heat way up, throw in half the garlic & sizzle in just the oil, until it starts to crisp brown to however dark you like.
bring the temp down, keep flipping, throw in half the butter.
when that melts, throw in the snow peas & other half of garlic..
flip until the snow peas just tender, throw in 2nd half of butter, flip a little & throw that stuff on a plate.
separate the snow peas & chicken a little, salt gently, sprinkling from your fingers, & then maybe garnish with a few thin apple slices (those sprinkled with just a little bit of brown sugar), fork on the plate, & say "i love you"..
i feel for you, man..
i hope you can work it out...
peace,
j
angerisagift
New member
I lived in Woodlands/Magnolia Texas for couple months. Whataburger BIIITCHES