Crazy hitchin story (1 Viewer)


StP Supporter
Apr 16, 2009
I hithced a ride out of a festival with this dude who was an "artist" he says who had a tnt at the festival where he was doing art "sculptures' with junk. and he says he trades everything he wants in life for his art. and everything in life is art. when I first meet him he's painted all over his upper body with body paint and glitter even on his nails, and he's' wearing jeans and sandles. I though it was a tad weird, but mind you it was like 2/3 in the after noon, late august upstate, ny hot summer, I was drunk since like 9 or ten in the am off of groundscored beers and festival security was telling he had to leave imediately, so the threw my stuff in his van and we left. also he had a ton of shit just thrown in th back of his van there was barely any room for my bag to go another b ad sign that I overlooked due to being cocked. after some random stops and getting pulled over for speeding on the NY state higways and having drug dogs come out becuase this idiot told the cops were coming from a festival were tons of drugs go and come from. and even told the cops ther might be a tab or 2 acid in the back of
his van becuase he picked yup trash of the ground for his art and people drop tabs on the ground sometimes. and he even gave the cops some stupid schetch that said cops are cool and had a peace sign and the cop just luaghed when he gave iit to him. I'm sitting shotgun watching this guy drive around on the same streets 3 seperate times, he hjad no real idea of where the fuck he was going and he said he was getting his bearing on where we needed to go by guiding himself by the stars, but he really diddn't know what he was doing aperently. then.. he wants cigs fromt he gas station and he still can't find his wallet. so he thinks, he's gonna trade a peice of artwork to the gas station lady so he can get cigs, I tiold him it wasnt gonna work so we just went in, bough him a pack of rollies and we got some slices of pizza and were on our way again drivign aroundin circles going now wwhere. our 1st destination was supposed to be NYC where the twin towers were so he could build an art memmorial, but It didnt seem like we we're getting anywhere. he asked me to drive for him for a while and
I noticed his gas tank was getting down to a 1/4 tank and I asked him what he was gona do about the situation and he said we'd make it to NYC but we were more than a couple hrs. away. I was starting to wonder even more if this guy was for real or not, I was starting to think more and more how rediculous this dude was. my tolerance for him was decreasing, then he ask me to drive for him, so I agree to drive, he says he want to take a nape for a little while. we switch seat, I start driving, the all th sudden he starts breathing real weird and starts drawing the designs/pictures all over him and is kinda in a trance/physcotic like state, like heh didn't even remmber I was there or something, the he breaks open the marker and smears it all obver him and before this he rubbed deoderant all over his body including head neck and face. then he takes crayons and starts coloring himself. inbetween all this he decides he doesn't like the radion anymore and decide that he thinks he can wire up his mp3 player to the radio while thwe cars is driving. so he starts popping off buttunes with his knife to remove the dash panel while I'm driving his knife comes like 6 inches or so from my face several times. now he's really getting to me, kinda startinbg to freak me out., literally breaking the dash bord off to get at the stereo, the he pops the radio out with his knife and cuts the wires with his knife while the radio was still on cuase he broke the volume, so we listend to static the whole time he was trying to do this shit, this go on for over a half hr. the he poorly spliced the wires of the mp3 player and radio and proceeds to use plastic grocery bags as elctirical tape, what a joke. and that aint gonna work! mean while his gas tank is gettingnear empty and all this crazyness was diastraing me from the road and we had smoked a bit to so.. I was watching him more than the road becuase what he was doing was so buizare. so ou tin the middle of niowhere I stoped his van under a street light on a back road in NY on rt 30 near the delaware river. I got out of his van took my shit and ditched a few bags of extra shit on the side of the road and walk 15 mins down the road walked up into the woods went to sleep. I woke up and had no idea where I was! I knew I was in NY and that was it. so I packed up all my shit and had decided to dich some more shit, a nother bag of stuff. walked for a while and really no cars where evne coming down the road it was like 9 in the am. I was trying to get somewhere atleast but I was worried. after being on that road for a while I hear another road with but with faster m oving cars on it, I assumed it to be somekinda highway, so I cut through 5 mins of woods to get there and that's wher eI came to the delaware river to fill up my water bottle aand take a break with my opack off while the purification tabs took effect. so after a lil break I keep walking, then I after I getback on the highway I start walking with my thuimb up everytime a car goes by, no luck until after walking for over three and half hrs. up the steep hillled roads with my way to heavy pack I got a ride from some big guy in his 60's he gave me a soda and a ride to one of the next towns over delhi, ny. it was collage town, so I though maybe i could find someone ppl to chill with and try and get them to bring me to this fest. so I waitied in the collage parkinglot for somebody to come out of the buildings, and 10mins later someone did and they told me to go to oneonta, ny and I he told meI coudl take a 5 dollar bus up there, but I decided to make a sign and sit by the stop light and five mins I got a ride from some kid who was just getting outta school and was going home to oneonta.
he brought me there and dropped me off behind a strip mall on a main street,found some ppl to let me stay with them 4 the week til the weekend and also found a ride to next fest.
We sell all kinds of other stuff in our Etsy store!


The Captain
Nov 2, 2007
around the USA
Holy shit, that's kinda rambling but interesting.
Interesting in the way that I'm glad I read of it rather than experienced it.
Fuck that nutcase "artist".
Lucky that you were the one driving then and could stop.


StP Supporter
Apr 16, 2009
oh... by the way.. if you ever run into me on the road, ask me about my crazy hitchin story! it'll be alot better told in person. nut maybe even more drawn out. oh well, I tried.

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